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This forum has been a strong support for me since I first discovered it. A lot of LOA principles actually align with many of those "getting your ex back" program, and the main focus is to find yourself, love yourself, and be strong as an individual again. I saw Mariposa's blog post and it reminded me of how confident I used to be. I remember telling myself and some of my friends jokingly (and confidently) "I am the right person for her" and it's my new affirmation now. It's just a shortened version of "I am attractive, etc. and will attract the her and people like her."

I know for a fact it's a matter of time before I see her or meet her for coffee and I am working hard on myself on being positive, and authentic, by the time I meet her. I can't wait to have a wonderful conversation with her .

However, I'm in a little dilemma, as much as she has been responding to me (even called me back after one of my messages), sometimes I feel her drifting away. Actually when she called me it felt like she was in a rush to end the call, so I don't know why she called to begin with. With that said, I am grateful she called .

I know I have hurt her a lot with my words and behaviour towards the end of the relationship, and I know her heart is closed to me right now. As much as she says she doesn't hate/blame me, I know for a fact that she isn't able to fully let go either. Her messages to me give me a mixed feeling, part of it feels very positive but another part feels like she just wants to end the contact. I know I should not overanalyze, and as such I have decided not to contact her for a week or two to work on myself and maybe give her the space she needs but isn't telling me. Right now it seems that she isn't facing her issues at all and is spending every day out with friends (at least that's the impression she is trying to give). I now accept that I cannot do anything about this.

On the bright side I guess her being somewhat cold is better than being completely normal...

Will really appreciate some input, especially from the ladies. Thank you and positive thoughts to all .

I have been guilty of reading into everything i was being told and overanalyzing things but it hasn't brought anything positive to my life at all, just worry and doubt and in terms of Loa the more you dwell on doubt and worry the more reasons you'll have to doubt and worry.

As you mention Mariposa's post, I think that's the way to go! I have come to the same conclusion as her and applied this to my life since i've been back in touch with my special someone and I have seen positive results. He used to be cold and distant but now we are much more closer than we've been.

There could be a number of reasons why she is cold and distant at times and they may not be related to you at all! The best thing to do is to "pretend" she is not distant, and to act as if she isn't distant. Don't take any negative behavior/words she has/says personally. If she called you it is because she wanted to talk to you.

Stay positive!

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Hi renee27, just my two cents, I don't think No Contact should have a timeframe applied to it. In my experience I did it for 6 days and she contacted me. I realized I was not emotionally ready yet, so I did it again. When I felt ready I gave her a call and had a good conversation. I am not sure what would've happened if I proceeded without contacting her for 30 days. At the end of the day I think the main thing is to trust your gut feeling.

The timeframe isn't really a rule, but in Renee's situation and given the informations she has given, she is clearly attached to her old relationship with that person and she isn't going to let go in 6 days..
Obviously the no contact isn't going to be a tactic of sort but rather to give her time to heal from that previous relationship and be ready for a new one with that same person if that's what she wants.
In any case, that person seems to be pulling away and no matter how many times she initiates contact that's not gonna change, it looks like it'll be counterproductive instead because he'll feel overwhelmed. When that is the case it is best to let the other person come to you when "they feel" ready because when they do initiate conversation you know that they are ready to listen to what you have to say.
All in all, it is not so much about no contact but rather letting the other person come to you when they have also healed and feel ready.

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Thank you for sharing this with us Mariposa!

As a matter of fact this is something I've come to realize too just recently when I read an article about changing people's behavior towards you, if that is possible, etc..and which advised to focus on the positive traits of the person and ignore everything that is negative, like in the beginning of a relationship. It led me to the same conclusion as you and I decided to apply it!

I thought that in my relationship to my special guy the same pattern kept recurring and so if I wanted things to change this pattern had to be broken somehow and the only way to do that was to change my attitude towards things and him. And so I decided to focus only on the positive aspect of things between us and our communications. I stopped reading into everything and most of all I enjoyed the present without worrying about what things may or may not lead to.

This is a person that I had been on no contact with for about 7 months and after we got back in touch and I applied this I've started to see him talk with me more and more, and get closer to me in new ways. It is still in the early stages of this but I think your article is spot on and a very good advice because I'm seeing results myself!

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It is nice to share your Loa diary on the forum Renee. It goes to show the kind of emotional rollercoaster we all go through when we miss someone.
I had been on no contact with my special guy for 7 months when we got back in touch and are closer now, so nothing is ever hopeless.
However, I think you should really go on no contact for at least 30 days like the other members advised you. Men tend to pull away like that and the best thing for you to do, even if it is really difficult, is to pull away too. You should let him come to you and not pursue him at this point. Most of the time men respond to actions and not words or persuasion.

Stay positive!

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I agree! Remote Seduction does work very well. Sometimes, there were period of times when I thought it wasn't as I couln't see any visible results/proofs, but i always found out thereafter it was working all along.
The other person feels the positive vibe but they don't always act on it immediately for whatever reason.

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From what I have read and my own experience, the dreams that matter or bear meaning are the ones that are usually very vivid and made an impression on you when you woke up.

I have also wondered and paid a lot of attention to my dreams..the day before my guy contacted me again after months of NC I had a very vivid dream of him doing so, it was very strange/coincidental as we hadn't talked for a long time and that dream just happened at the right time. I imagine the universe just showed me that my wish was about to manifest or that there was no longer a conflict between what I wanted and my belief of actually getting it.

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Thank you!

I don't quite remember, it was written Law of attraction, but we were not able to open it. I imagine there are quite a few out there now but I was surprised about it as i had no idea it existed.
What is the Loa tarot about? How does this work exactly, and why don't you like it much?

I'd be interested in getting one of your general readings!

Also, I was wondering if you are using/or know about the LOA cards, I thought by the name of the topic it was what it was about..I was in a library the other day and I came across it, it seems to be a set of cards related to LOA exclusively but as it was plastified I couldn't open it and have a look..

Do you remember what it was called? I know there's a LOA tarot deck, but I don't like the art. There are various oracles, too. I have an Abraham one called Health and the Law of Attraction. I wouldn't mind getting my hands on others in the series, eventually. When I do, I'll probably offer readings with them.

It will be a bit of a wait for your reading here, though. I'm so behind!

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I'd be interested in getting one of your general readings!

Also, I was wondering if you are using/or know about the LOA cards, I thought by the name of the topic it was what it was about..I was in a library the other day and I came across it, it seems to be a set of cards related to LOA exclusively but as it was plastified I couldn't open it and have a look..

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Well it is difficult to judge without knowing the bigger picture and how A and B are possibly interconnected (?).
Attachement can be a possibility and probably the reason there.
Perhaps the universe needs to give you B before A for whatever reason that you cannot see right now, no matter how much you want A to happen before B.. it is quite possible that the fastest way to get A is to get B before, but again it is just a theory.
Lastly, the universe is already aligning things to give you A but B just happened to take less time but it doesn't mean A isn't on the way!

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I visualized, usually at night before going to bed. It didn't take much effort, mostly I knew he would make a step towards me. He sent me a first message a few months ago, i didn't answer and he contacted me again just a week or so ago, and it has been almost 7 months or something since the last time we talked. I didn't reply to his message. Instead I commented on some random post he made on Facebook because I felt I should make a step forward at that particular moment, it was just instinctive.. and he unblocked me from there so it shows he wants to talk to me. I haven't planned to make another step towards him until he does now but I believe he will. It is just a matter of days/weeks.
Now the funny thing is that when he contacted me the first time after a few months of no contact, I had a dream of him actually doing so just before so it was kind of weird..I have had several dreams of us talking like that. They were always very vivid.

Nothing is impossible, it may seem to you that you'll never get in touch again but it is not unrealistic to believe he will contact you. I manifested me and my guy meeting up, and he flew from the other side of the world for that, it did feel impossible then so a simple phone call or email is much easier

I think you're dead on with being between the fear of missing something and the feeling you're delusional. So how did you manifest his contact. I honestly don't visualize or do any of that stuff bc I don't know how consistent or high-vibrating I will be so I had been focusing on letting go all of this time, but that hasn't worked. I completely get that FB is an opening but until he contacts me that won't happen only bc of where I stand. So how do I stay high on the near impossible yet possible thought of contact? And where are you now with your story Lily?

Thanks so much Big hug to you!

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I know how that feels. Myself, I am stuck between my inability to move on in the fear of missing out on something and my fear of being delusional about the whole thing and thus wasting time.
I used Loa to have him contact me and it worked, had he not made contact I would have probably lost hope by now, but I have manifested great quasi impossible things in the past thanks to LOA so whenever I'm stuck I think about that and it brings me faith.

If he broke into your account it is a good sign that he cares and is affected by what you do. I have the same fear about Facebook but when you are no longer talking and you live apart it remains the best way to keep some sort of contact. Like I said you can block his feeds while he can see yours, likewise you can block him from chat while still giving him access to your profile which is also a good compromise..it is a matter of you not being tempted to look at his profile.
So you have all those options to choose from when he contacts you, and he will eventually, focus on it, visualize it and it'll happen

I have posted this story before, it is my fav story on the secret website because I can totally relate to it, I hope it will help you too: http://thesecret.tv/stories/stories-read.html?id=17644

I know that he may think that way and I'm almost 100% that as much as I'm afraid of rejection he's doubly afraid. But I was so hurt by seeing his constant feeds and it had been on the heels of him telling me he loved me BUT...I was hurting and I thought the only way to move past him in my heart or at least begin somewhere was to not have that heart pounding moment everytime I signed in to FB, so I blocked him. He immediately broke into my account, logging in with my user name and password from his laptop and FB alerted me. As much as that made me feel a little good it didn't change a damn thing and he never reached out regardless. So yes I'd love to dialogue with him and I agree that if he were to take initiative I would unblock him but in the meantime I can't help but wonder. Thank you for your post, it always moves me when I can identify with someone's story. Especially since I can't really talk about it or I sound like the girl who's never moved on and is delusional after 7 mths of healing

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I know exactly how you feel and i have been having the exact same way of thinking. The first few months that we have been on no contact and that i've been wondering whether i should make the first step or not I always held back thinking that if i did make the first step towards reconcilliation it would like admitting that it is ok to treat me like the way he did and he would lose all respect for me and thus no real healthy relationship could be built after that, which may sound like a silly reasoning to most.

He did try to get my attention several times and contacted me twice during that time and I felt it was ok to make a step towards him as a result because I don't believe you can solve problems without talking neither can a relationship be built on no contact..no contact for me only works to heal and get rid of the anger or to move on. I'm past that now.

He may have wanted to contact you but is worried of how you may react or whatever reason holding him back. Let him make a first step towards you before you unblock him this way he'll understand that you are open to dialogue. He could be thinking that the fact that you blocked him means that you don't want to have anything to do with him anymore.

To stefzilla: It's funny u say not to post and I usually do my best not to post on that issue but instead read other's uplifting posts or just read up on LOA, but in having that excitement that LOA can work I end up thinking "well how do I make a conscious effort to improve while not focusing on the desire to want him back". I mean, essentially, I am on this forum to improve my life bc I wasn't happy with myself and that was clear but my desire to attract my ex overlaps so how do I set that intention and forget about it when I'm on here? It can't help but creep up especially when so many posts are so often about  updates with  exes. I completely understand that my problem is the problem but how do I let go.? That has been my intention from day one...when I use anger it doesn't work, when I try forgiveness, I have unresolved issues that come up. How do I release without focusing on the wrong things? I do go out with friends but honestly after 7mths the going out has really dwindled bc I'm tired of it! I read and I'm writing a screenplay...it's just so hard. For example I even tried to go teach in Italy for the summer, so I could do me and get out of my comfort zone and I never got a call back. I've been trying to go on vacay all summer and no one is available. I'm doing my best to not crack but I feel like everything is working against me. I've done over 30 days of a gratitude journal, really appreciating what I have and hoping to feel on top of the world. I've even watched "how you can heal your life" and the secret" Instead I feel so alone and sad at times...

To lily: I'm comforted by your situation and it helps in knowing this altho I feel if he truly wanted contact by now he would have made an attempt. Did  I matter so little to him, that it weighs on my mind and not on his? I'm so forgettable to him. Secondly, once I blocked him, I feel silly to unblock especially since it will be so obvious to him and will inadvertently give him the upper hand once again. Not that I'm into games but what I mean is it will easily give him that signal that he can easily have me and that was the problem before, he clearly lost emotional attraction to me.

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Hello Newella,

There really is no rule, it doesn't matter how long you have been out of touch there is always hope. I have heard of stories where people reunited after years of being apart.
Me and my guy had been on no contact for 5 months when he contacted me a first time, and 7 months when he contacted again as I hadn't answered the first time. I think people need to deal with the issue and when they are ready better communication and contact will ensue.
If Facebook is the only way you have to show him the progress you have made/and or the only contact you have with him I don't recommend blocking him. You can hide his feeds but I think it is a good thing that he has the ability to see yours..

I just see that so many ppl on here got their exes back but it was just a matter of keeping in touch and their exes seeing their progress over time and a having a vested interest in what happened even while apart. My ex and I broke up 7 mths ago...he said he wanted to stay in my life but didn't know how to do it when I saw him last. He kept my stuff for a while and said he still loved me but shot me down (4 mths ago). Since then, it was too difficult so I blocked him from FB and he logged into my acct from his laptop, probably to see if I had blocked him. I didn't do it to get a reaction I truly did it to move on bc I was so hurt. Then he texted me shortly after for my Birthday but I had been so torn down by everything that I didn't answer. In and of itself his text was short and guarded. It read Happy Birthday, all the best, so I ignored it...now's it's been 7 mths and I wonder, can it ever be? Wouldn't he have reached out by now. I've done a lot for myself in this time and don't normally sound this dejected but when I read success posts, often it's with ppl who break up for a mth or two and stay in constant touch. That, to me, is an automatic sign that the ex hasn't let go and chances to  get back are high. I want to completely let go but seem to be stuck. I do Sekhem energy and I've tried Binaural beats but he's always in my mind and heart, daily

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I agree with Stefzilla, from my own experience, just because you don't see any immediate signs proving to you that it is working, it does not mean that it is not working. The person is feeling the effect but for whatever reason hasn't decided to act on it yet, you shouldn't give up though because eventually you will see the results.

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http://thesecret.tv/stories/stories-read.html?id=17644

I'm not ready to admit my feelings to her since she seems so close to and involved with him. I want to, but I think for now it is best to wait until I can draw her closer to me, so she may be more accepting of how I feel and more willing to reconsider our relationship.

How do I stop thinking the worst and thinking of him when I think of her?

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