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Topics - OmAumOm
« on: March 14, 2012, 08:48:45 AM »
Yes, MY EX AND I ARE BACK TOGETHER... well, sort of
!!! it's been almost 6 months and it's been an insane journey, I don't even know where to start...
I first started visiting these forums out of desperation, and fear, and everything was going down hill for me... I got heaps and heaps of advice, these forums helped me stay stable in the times I couldn't keep myself up. And then after a few months of waiting for something I felt like I was just desperately hanging onto for comfort... I let it go. And I mean REALLY let it go. It's hard to explain but I'll try my best for you guys
So there was a LOT of crap surrounding the situation between my ex and I. there was bitchiness, name calling, hatred flown all over the place, we went for periods without talking, he did some really stupid things and I did some really stupid things. I'd always tell myself that I deserved better, that he wasn't worth it and I tried really hard to move on. But no matter what I did, I knew that deep down I had feelings for him... no matter how much I denied it to myself and everyone around me. I'd even tell my friends that I'd never be able to see him romantically again, and I probably believed that at some time - but whenever we would talk, it just felt so... right and normal and comfortable. Both of us were pushing our feelings down though, it was a really strange friendship.
He didn't cheat but he did break my heart, moved on really quickly and everything... if you've read any of my other posts from awhile back you'd be able to hear my pain through everything that I'd say... and then I came back once he was with this girl to be all "I just want to be his friend" when he hated me. Well I figured out I was hanging onto the friendship for a particular reason! haha.
When I stopped actively trying to get him back, when I stopped caring.. that's when everything fell into place. When I was literally like "hey, this doesn't matter anymore, whatever happens happens, I'm awesome either way" THAT'S when we got closer and eventually admitted our feelings for each other again, and decided to give this 'thing' a go. We're not official we're taking things slow... but we're both really happy. I have a lot of 'reasons' that would kind of determine me not getting back with him but logic just gets thrown out the window in these situations hahaha.
If anyone is looking for advice... which a lot of you are: all I can say is this. It's a journey. Nothing will happen overnight. You learn SO much about yourself through the law of attraction, and don't just use these tools to get an ex back. How you really get your ex back? Ask and believe it. Spend some time focusing on it, then LET IT GO. Don't worry about it anymore!!!!!!!! Get over him/her, do what you love, focus on your own happiness. I finally understand what all this advice is about - I'd be trying hard to be happy just to get my ex back, but when he came back it was when I knew that I would HONESTLY be okay with or without him. Without him I'd be happy, with him I'd be happy. I didn't NEED him. I stopped trying to get him back. I know it's kind of contradictory, but this seems to be the way the law works!
If you have any questions feel more than free to ask!!! Absolutely anything. I owe these forums so much... and I know I left things out here... I'm kind of just on a roll, I'm not even sure if this will make sense hahaha.
Lots of love!!!!!!!!!!!
« on: February 10, 2012, 08:44:33 PM »
The feelings associated with a breakup can be so... confusing. It's been four months and I'm still feeling mixed emotions and the past few months are a blur and I've had moments of clarity and moments of confusion.
I guess this is what happens with every breakup, right?
I mean, I am moving on. I could never be with him again. He couldn't be with me again. Sometimes I wonder if I try to convince myself that he still has feelings for me, because it makes me feel more in control or something.
Like we're not talking and he said he didn't want to be friends because he thought his feelings for me would come back. Then he'd be insanely rude to me. And he said he'd try to convince himself he hates me so those feelings never come back.
I know this will all go away with more time, but it's been four months already, that's longer than half our relationship. I mean, why is this taking so long? All the false promises, the mess when it ended, everything.
I feel regretful, yet at the same time I feel grateful. And I'm still incredibly confused how he feels.
But I guess it doesn't matter how he feels.
I need to move on with my life.
You guys all have such strength even considering getting back with an ex. I couldn't. I think there will always be something there but after everything, I just couldn't.
I can't remember what it's like to even like someone and I can't imagine being in another relationship but I hope that all changes soon.
You know that u2 song with or without you... that song describes how I'm feeling. On one hand, I know it could never be like how it was, and we're different people now. But those feelings just... linger there. I miss the love and care, and then afterwards wondering if it was all for a show because he moved on so quickly. Just so many mixed emotions. I mean, are breakups always this confusing??? How do people open themselves to a new relationship? I just... whaaa.
I miss talking to him but it's not the same. I can't talk to him. I miss it all but at the same time I need to let it go. I can never go back to how it was. I don't think I want to. Nostalgia is just getting the better of me.
Sorry, this is just kind of like an outlet I need... something to publish.
« on: January 25, 2012, 08:40:23 PM »
Hey guys, been away for sometime because I've been really busy and focusing on other things... I'm so happy at the moment, 2012 has been incredible and I'm just so happy with everything. I have so many things to be grateful for, especially my best friends, we've all hit 2012 together after a crap 2011 and we're all having an amazing time, j'adore la vie it's truly beautiful...
I hope you have all had a brilliant start to 2012 as well!
Noooow, here is the confusing part in my life. My intentions when I came to this board some months ago were to get my ex back. Since then I've honestly gotten completely over him and I could never, ever imagine myself romantically involved with him. HOWEVER, the part that does hurt is that we did try to be friends, then all of a sudden he's turned sour and hates me for no reason. Or whatever reason, it's terribly petty/silly. I guess I care because I was once so close to him, and now he's gone all negative and horrible. An update on what happened: we broke up, we were friends, he got with another girl shortly after, we were still friends but it hurt me a lot and that was my "screw you!" phase which I think he took to me "I still have feelings for you" so then he suggested for us not to be friends, and during this time I think is when he started disliking me... probably from random things people say, and also my friendship with this guy that he absolutely hates, yada yada there's probably multiple factors... ANYWAY, at a gathering he was at I tried talking to him and I just said look we can be friends I don't have feelings for you anymore (this was like 2 weeks ago and honestly I my feelings had become completely platonic) and he got really blunt and rude, telling me he didn't want to be my friend and how it upset him that I went on antidepressants after we broke up (aka got happy again) and then he started saying he hated me sometimes, and I was just so confused because I hadn't seen him for over a month so this was all coming out of no where it seemed... anyway, then he was saying that he loved his girlfriend and he didn't want to be friends because he wasn't sure if she was a rebound or not and then he was like "I don't know if my feelings for you would come back or not if we were friends" and then we just stopped talking because he was being a boob (I was drunk and he was sober and he hates alcohol so that probably had something to do with it). Anyways, then he sent me a text saying he didn't want to me friends, for me to leave him alone, and that if he wanted to be friends he'd talk to me but right now he doesn't want to.
After that I was like pfft screw him, and did leave him alone. Since then, he was at a party I was at and he was with his girlfriend, and I barely saw him, didn't look at him, barely noticed him because I was focused on this other guy (who I eventually hooked up with
) and then he broke up with his girlfriend (well, now ex I guess) and today he was at another gathering and we just avoided each other completely.
WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH HIM? I just want to be friends because honestly, he was a big part of my life and he was special to me, and I appreciated him as a person and he always said that he wanted to be friends and would say that I was great and everything, then all of a sudden he's bitter acting all victimised thinking that there's a war going on between us and that my friends are turning against him (which they haven't despite everything that's happened)... in a way I feel sorry for him because he's doing it to himself but I think he's just blaming others. I don't know if he hates me or why he hates me or what the hell is going on, or if he just doesn't give a crap anymore. I'm NOT going to talk to him first, he was so rude to me and I wouldn't want someone like that in my life anyway - I guess I just wish he got better and stopped being so negative!
Guys, help me out here! How is everything like this now? I was so sad when we broke up, and he was meeting a new girl and new friends, and now it's flipped and he's hating everything and I'm in love with the world. I think it also has to do with the fact that I am actually immensely happy now, and when we were together I was really depressed refusing medication, and I wonder if it's because he wishes I was happy then so none of this would have happened so that's why he's so full of hate now? I dunno. People are strange!! I dunno if I even want to be friends with him now because he's acted like a twit, I just don't get why he's being so sour!
(I know this doesn't have much to do with LOA, but I value all of your guys opinions and obviously LOA can be incorporated into everything)
Love to you all!! xxx
« on: January 01, 2012, 05:54:26 PM »
Last year (because as of today it's now 2012! woo!) I went through severe depression and anxiety and was crippled throughout most of the year, and lost people (my ex) in the process and had an unbelievably tough time coping with everything, I was very much so on the verge of suicide. I've been taking antidepressants, something that I was mostly against, because it was a last resort and I couldn't get myself out of it. They have made me feel better, but of course not 100% because a lot of it is internal work... also, there was mostly no cause of the mental illness
I was wondering, how could you use the LOA to mentally heal you? What kind of things should I be doing - affirmations about being happy, etc?
Any help would be much appreciated
And happy new year guys
I wish you all the best for 2012
« on: January 01, 2012, 04:24:52 PM »
(p.s. HAPPY NEW YEAR GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
some annoying thoughts have been rolling around in my head - this is gonna be a pretty elaborate vent, so... just a 'warning'
I think I let go of a good guy, a nice guy. Before we got together I was TERRIFIED of being in a relationship because of my parents failed marriage and I was TERRIFIED of being as hurt as my mum was, because I saw her go through all of that. I was afraid of being vulnerable, afraid of getting romantically close to someone, and even kissing someone freaked me out! It took SO MUCH to get with my ex in the first place, and it's because I knew that he'd be worth it, because he was so caring and lovely - he knew how I felt about being vulnerable, and he was okay with it and didn't make me feel silly or pressure me or anything. I really thought I had found a gem.
Months down the track, I was severely depressed and he couldn't handle it anymore. I was crying all the time and self harming and just wanted to die. I was scared of losing him. I felt like I was a burden to him, a burden to everybody. And then... he had enough. I don't blame him, it would have been incredibly hard on him. It was so unbelievably painful at the time though, because of the fear, because of my insecurities, and because of my fear of being hurt.
And I feel like it's all my fault.
He'd say "it's my fault for not being strong enough", but it's really my fault for being a whiny bitch all the time. I guy who cared about me stopped loving me because I couldn't stop crying or be grateful about anything.
It took so much for me to let myself be vulnerable, and as I fell more in love with him I fell more into fear and self loathing. I was a goddamn mess. I still am.
And he's got a new girlfriend now. And they spent new years together. They started talking really really really soon after we broke up. Like a week after. And she's better for him. And now he doesn't have the burden of me on his back. And I'm trying SO HARD to get over him and SO HARD to stop thinking about him.
The thing is, he was a nice guy, he was lovely.... but in the end - was he as nice as I thought he was, did he change or something? But I can't say if he was a nice guy or not because I mean, every human being does silly things.
And I feel like a whiny insecure jealous girl who can't let go of something. I feel stupid for being so hurt. I feel stupid for screwing up the relationship because I didn't have my head on properly.
This year, I want to be genuinely happy. I want to be okay with myself. I want to genuinely love myself, not dip in and out of it.
I want to be able to say "I'm happy" and know I'm 100% happy, not saying it with uncertainty.
I just wanna be okay again.
« on: December 26, 2011, 05:10:15 PM »
Thought I'd start this thread to get the positivity rolling. What are the reasons you want to attract your ex (love) back? What are you grateful for in regards to your love? Why do you want your love back specifically, and not somebody else? What provides you with the most faith?
As a lot of us here want an ex back, I thought it'd be nice if we all shared our stories
most of you know from me sharing my journey, I'm no longer manifesting my ex back because I realised that we weren't right for each other. It still hurts, and it may for sometime, but I know there's a better guy out there for me. This quote by Marilyn Monroe made me realise that I was essentially wasting my time on a guy who wasn't even right for me: "I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."
My ex is with a new girl now and I wish him the best, even though sometimes I do feel like punching him in the face (hey, I've had my heartbroken). I hope one day I can be friends with him.
I'd love to hear all your stories, a collective thread of our experiences of LOA and relationships
« on: December 21, 2011, 08:04:40 PM »
Hey guys, I hope you're all doing well. Kind of in need of a venting session, it's easier for me to put it out here where I can get feedback instead of in my diary where I just mull it over in my head.
This is killing me. I just want to forget about him. I spent like two months trying to get him back, and it just prolonged the pain. I couldn't give up. I've faced that we're never going to get back together - I don't want to. You know, I still love him, but it hurts way too much. I couldn't trust him like that again. It hurts coming to that realisation. It hurts knowing he is happy with someone else.
I feel like I can't do certain things because of him. Like it hindered me. I was invited to this gathering and him and his new gf were invited to, I wanted to go but I couldn't face them. My ex and I ended on good terms then he realised it'd be better if we weren't friends for the meantime, because I need to get over it. It's like he always has the say, he always has the power. He was the one who ended the relationship, the one who chose to be with the other girl, the one who chose not to be friends now. I want to be friends with him in the future... I think. The no contact thing is good though because I need to get over him, I want to get over him so badly. Talking to him would just prolong the pain. I want to not think about him and just... not have it hurt me any longer. I'm angry. I feel rejected and worthless.
I commend all of you guys for keeping the faith in getting your ex back. I know how goddamn hard it is. You're all amazing, incredible, strong people.
To be totally honest, part of me still wants him back. But I think that part is just the part that longs for the comfort of having a romantic partner. I just couldn't get back with him, not with how things went. Deep down I know for sure there's a better guy out there for me. It hurts all the same though. It's almost been three months... and I still have down days.
Tonight I felt particularly bad. It feels like it's a lot fresher than it was. Like the wound is fresh.
Part of me wants to go to his house and smash all his windows, and part of me wants to go to his house and hug him. You know the feeling.... urgh.
In my head I know I shouldn't be hung up about some tosser who wasn't there for me... "if you're dumb enough to leave, I'm smart enough to let you go"... even though he was tactless about the whole thing, it's proving hard to get over him, I just wanna erase him from my memory.......
« on: December 12, 2011, 11:00:46 PM »
I know he's not the one for me, he's with another girl now and we're still friends yet I do miss him still. The thing is, I don't want to be with him because it didn't work out before and we're just not right for each other... the relationship we had is not one that I want with the next guy. I want someone really suited to me, ya know? And it hurts because he moved on so fast yet I know he still values me but it's like... I wasn't enough. He wanted something new, I don't like to admit it but basically he just got bored or something. We're so young though so that's normal, I was getting bored to but I clinged to it because I had become so emotionally attached to him.
I don't want to attract him back like I used to and I have been really happy recently. But still, there are days like today where I don't feel good about it. I don't feel good about being dumped, not being able to move on after two months, and I miss kissing him and... other things. He's got someone else to fill that space now, and I don't... I have my friends whom I all love dearly and my amazing family, and I'm so grateful for my friends and family but everyone likes to feel romantically adored... and I had that for a long time, and now that it's gone it's proven hard to adjust to. Part of me still loves him and wants him, but I know deep down it really isn't meant to be. If we ever got back together it just wouldn't be the same. We're on different paths.
I'm posting this because I don't really have anyone else to talk to about it. I've spoken to my friends about it and they all say the same advice that I already know, it takes time and I will get over him eventually. When I feel like this I don't want to go back to them about it because I kind of just need an outlet, not advice, because I already know the advice.
Could anyone here tell me stories about getting over past ex's (obviously not the ones you're manifesting back into your lives) or first love stories, etc?
I've learned a lot from the whole experience, but I wish I could listen to certain songs (like "our" song) and not feel sad about it. I am positive I'll get over it eventually, but it's the one thing that brings me down and I need an emotional bandaid for it in the meantime...
« on: December 02, 2011, 12:53:31 PM »
As some of you may know as I've posted about it here and there... my bf and I broke up early October and since then have talked every now and then, him initiating the contact (usually messaging). We both agreed to be friends after the break up and I was so distraught after it but eventually got myself back on track with the help of LOA and pulling myself out of a pit of depression that I've experienced for most of the year (I'm not out of it completely, but I've come a long way). Soooo we talked a bit up after the breakup, although that's all kinda irrelevant now. Anyway, as we had both organised earlier in the year that a group of friends would all go on a holiday, and we decided we'd still do that even though we had broken up and everything.
I got home from this week today. I guess there's a lot to say... but firstly, I was pretty worried about this week and did have a bit of a crying moment on the first day to myself. I quickly snapped myself out of it though, reassured myself that my week was not going to be ruined because of him. It was a bit difficult at times, like it's hard to get someone out of your mind when they're around all the time but it was mostly fine. We had a few talks, he asked me how I was feeling about everything and I said I didn't know... he said he didn't know either. I told him that I thought I was over him but being around him proved that I wasn't. He said that the time we'd been apart he missed me, and although he likes a new girl he still feels something for me. I told him I was split between wanting him back and wanting to move on, and he said he was split between wanting me back and wanting to be with this other girl. After tears and hugs and all that, we agreed that we'd remain good friends. I wished him luck with the new girlfriend.
Anyyyyyyyway, throughout the week there was a bit of a sexual tension build up, and one of the nights... we got a bit "physical". We didn't have sex but we did ah, other things. It was kind of like a release from the sexual tension from the week... it seemed right, I don't know. And it was fine in the morning, not awkward at all, and we both knew where we stood with each other.
I know that this is part of the process, and him being with this other girl is part of the process (and part of my past negative thoughts) and this break will do us good. I love him enough now to be absolutely fine with friendship. Who knows, maybe I'lll meet another guy soon and date him for awhile, and who knows how long him and the other girl will last. It doesn't matter anymore. I'm really happy and I'm grateful for the time I spent with him and I know that we're going to remain good friends even if it doesn't turn into something more and that's fine with me because I know that I'll find a man I truly love whether it's him or not and I know he'll find a girl he truly loves whether it's me or not.
Everything is perfect right now because everything is how it should be, no matter how crap your situation may seem. It all leads up to the big picture and we have to wait out and enjoy the ride.
I hope this wasn't too long
[[edited for personal reasons]]
« on: November 24, 2011, 06:41:45 PM »
Broke up with my bf over a month ago, he's moved on and has a thing with this other girl at the moment, she's a really lovely girl actually... I no longer feel the pain of heartbreak, no longer cry over him, no longer sit around wishing for him to call. This morning for some reason I played this seen in my head of me bumping into the girl he's kinda got a thing with (they're not officially going out yet but they like each other) and what do you know, I bumped into her... with him! AND I WAS FINE WITH IT! I said hello to both of them, at first I felt that fight/flight thing (you know, when your stomach drops, adrenaline kicks in...) then I sort of laughed to myself. It was just such a bizarre 'coincidence'... though I know of course, the universe was purposely throwing this at me
I'm actually happy for them, they suit each other. And I feel kind of bad if I keep going with attracting my ex back because I don't want the other girl to be heartbroken at the end of it! If, for some strange reason, he told me that he didn't know if he should be with her or me (I'm not hopeful of this, I'm just using it as an example) I would actually tell him to pursue the other girl. And I wouldn't be saying it as a reverse psychology thing, I would really mean it.
The thing is, I would still like him back. And I miss him at times, and some days I miss him more than others. And sometimes it hurts a bit when I think of him with the other girl. But I'm content not being with him. I know that I could find another guy, in fact I met a guy the other night and we were holding hands and cuddling... I mean, it was just a random drunken thing but it's like, I've just been thinking about him less and less. And yes, I'd like him back, but I just don't care anymore. I want him to be happy, I want that other girl to be happy, and they may find happiness together - maybe they're just more suited for each other. And I'm happy right now, just being myself, getting on with my life without him! I have no idea if I'm moving on or letting go? I have no idea what's going to happen. I'm trusting the universe, and diving into the unknown... because I don't have a clear intention of getting back with my ex, I can't "trust" that it's going to be the guaranteed outcome. But I know something pretty damn awesome is coming my way.
So, I think I'm asking for guidance because, I mean... I do still want him back, but I'm not bothered about it anymore. I feel at peace with it. I'm probably just posting this because I want some reassurance and someone to say "everything's gonna be fine, he'll return better than ever, you're letting go, watch him come back to you!" but then again, none of us know anyway. I trust something good is happening, but I don't know what, I don't know if my ex is coming back... I just have this good feeling. I guess that's all that matters, right?
« on: November 21, 2011, 11:08:54 AM »
I feel like we could get back together (my ex and I), but I don't know if it's worth holding onto... I don't want to hold on to someone and hope for them to come back, if they never do. I don't feel the need to "long" for him any more, I mean I miss him and want to be with him but I'm okay with or without him, and I want him to happy to - which may mean, not with me. I don't know what's gonna happen and I don't know if anything will happen or if I'll just eventually move on and find someone else (he's moved on and found someone else). I'm not consciously intending it any more, it's kind of just at the back of my mind, I guess I'm trying to center myself and go with the flow and trust the universe. I'm not sure if this is 'letting go' or not, I don't really care if we get back together because I know I'll be able to find someone else, even though it'll be work to totally move on, I know that I can do it. I don't have complete faith that we're going to get back together, because whenever I try to work on that faith it just kicks me in the face and makes me desperate for it. So I'm kind of... embracing freedom and going with the flow. And I still would like to be with him but if I'm not, that's cool too, and I'll get over it eventually. I'm happy being friends. I just don't want to cling to the faith because it messes with my emotions. I get really positive but then something knocks me back because I rely on it to make me happy, so I just find it easier not caring because then I feel more in charge of my emotions and it doesn't affect me as much. Am I heading in the right direction?
I've obviously got a lot of questions to ask/answer myself, but I'm just wondering if I could have input from someone who has gotten their ex back, or is working on it, or tried to get their ex back but then moved on, or just any insight at all.
« on: November 19, 2011, 01:52:02 PM »
About a week ago, my eyes wandered on a cycling magazine that was on the bench (my brother cycles a lot) and I immediately thought of this guy who I knew years
ago who lives around my neighbourhood who I know is very into cycling, as I've seen him riding around. As the thought of him flickered in my mind, I decided that as a "test" and a bit of fun I'd attract seeing this guy soon, just to see how the universe would throw it at me. I'm not friends with this guy, I hadn't seen him around for at least 6 months, I just thought that it'd be funny to pick out someone totally without significance in my life and see if I could manifest bumping into him. So I closed my eyes, visualised seeing him, then forgot all about it. Because I didn't take it very seriously it was easy to forget about.
Well, the very next he was on my train. The same carriage, and got off just a stop before me. I had actually forgotten all about the intention and when I saw him, I was flabbergasted! I hadn't seen him in ages, I don't have any connection to him at all... and he was there. Now of course, this didn't particularly make any change in my life because I purposely chose something eccentric and random to see if it would manifest. And it did, within a day. I've started doing all these little insignificant manifestations just to keep my faith up, and they've been happening within a day or two of me briefly thinking about them. It's lots of fun
Basically the point of sharing this is, that yes, the law works all the time. A lot of people "doubt" it and wonder how you can use the law of a attraction to get something... well, you don't necessarily use
it, because you're always using it whether you're aware of it or not. You can direct it but not "choose" to use it... it just happens. Doing these small manifestations also made me realise something particularly important - being absolutely, completely detached is what brings it to you fastest, because it's okay if you don't get it or not. Unfortunately, it makes it harder to attract the things we really
want... but it's a very important lesson I've learned, just from doing these tiny manifestations. Doing this exercise also puts me in a good mood because it strengthens my belief that everything really is in divine order, and I can have anything I want
« on: November 18, 2011, 10:32:56 AM »
Letting go is the part we all seem to have trouble with, I found this quote and it helped me understand/trust better so I thought I'd share:
"Imagine that you are out on the sea. Sometimes it is calm, sometimes it is stormy. And you feel that you have to have your compass, you have to have your charts, you have to see the stars, you have to see the sun, you have plan your course and you have to adjust the sails and work the oars and man the rudder and all of these things in order to get where you're going. In order to get where you'd like to go, where you think you want to go, you have to do all of these things. And you think "easy" then means that the sea remains calm with just the right amount of wind, not too much sun to burn you but enough to keep you warm, and all of these things that would support all of these procedures that your mind thinks it has to do.
But actually "easy" means letting go of all that. Letting go. Trusting that the waves, the wind, the sun, will all somehow propel you to exactly where you need to be. You can just enjoy the ride. You can just lie back, know that you're getting there, perhaps catch a fish now and then, perhaps write some poetry. Whatever you might do out on the ocean. "Easy" means allowing it to happen, even when the storm comes up, even when the wind seems to be blowing the opposite direction than it did the day before. Can you trust this? Can you allow it to be easy?"
found here: http://www.youaregodalso.com/channels/reality-creation-and-the-mind
« on: November 17, 2011, 09:52:05 AM »
My boyfriend and I broke up over a month ago... I'm still not over him and I was going to try to manifest him back. However I've decided that I really need to let him go, I want to get over him and not feel the pain anymore. Attempting to manifest him back for me is clinging onto him, and causes my moods to flicker between "yes I can do this!" to "no, I can't do this" and it consumes me a lot. We're friends now, and he likes another girl (she likes him back), which is fine (although painful)...he has free will. I guess what I'm saying is, I'm going to try my best to really get over him. I'm not going to focus on the "getting your ex back" things anymore... I'm going to focus on me, what I need to do to feel content, complete and fine in myself, and really connecting with my Higher Self.
Part of me wants him back in my life, and part of me wants to move on and not be back with him in a romantic relationship (but that's because of the hurt I'm still dealing with). The thing is... it's hard trying to get over him, because in a way I don't want to because I think deep down I do want him back, I'm just trying to convince myself otherwise. But I need to move on so I don't deal with the pain and sense of loss anymore. I have my good days and my bad days. I guess my question is, if I did want him back, wouldn't I have to really move on from him anyway, so I wouldn't be 'needing' him? In moving on and finding inner peace, the Universe will then provide me with the relationship I really desire - whether it's with him or not. So, I'm letting go of getting a specific person back, as this lowers resistance. I'm also still healing from the break up so I'm not even in a position where I could get into another relationship because of fear and doubts still wandering my mind.
Is this the right way of going about things? As you can probably tell, I'm a bit muddled/confused...
« on: November 14, 2011, 01:07:42 PM »
So I've been talking to my ex a little bit, he initiated contact. I think he just wants to make sure that I don't hate him or anything haha
Anyway he told me that he was thinking about asking out this girl he's been talking to, he said he wants to ask her out and I think they've gotten along well and I'm happy for him... I mean it hurts but, good for him I guess. I told him that he should do it, and that she seems like a really nice girl (which she does). I think he was a bit surprised by my casualness of it all actually, haha.
I still want to get back with him, but I'm a little bit confused now. Can you get an ex back even if they're with someone else? Would it be wise to let this all go, and not really bother attracting him back anymore? The thing is, I had signs from the universe and everything about my intention, I felt like I was moving along and manifesting, and there's this little speed bump about him interested in this other girl (which I actually think I may have attracted over the past month). I'm not really sure where to go from here... give up and move on? Keep desiring? Has anyone on here gotten an ex back even though they were with someone else? To be honest, I'm not sure if we're right for each other, but I still love him a lot.
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