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Damn, ILR, I  know  this  wasn't  directing  to me,  but  that  hit  home  and  says  it  all.  often  times  we seek  reassurance  or  wasn't  others opinons bc  we  are  second  guessing... our  maybe  we  are  so  intertwined  in a situation emotionslky  we  want  an  outsider opinion  or  assessment.  You  are  right  though. I  needed this tonight.  thank  you.

P.S. I've missed  your  face around here. Stop  being a  stranger :p

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I've actually never thought about it like that. But you bring up a good point and you are probably onto something...

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Well I don't try to look for signs too much, But l do notice them occasionally. It has to be something overwhelmingly flashing for me to chalk it up to a sign. There is one thing that I take as a sign that I'm on the right path that I wont mention  b/c it's personal that I see often but last night a rather odd thing happened to me. I use an app for sms messaging. I have different backgrounds for each of my people that i sms regularly. My love had texted me last night and I replied I went back in the message to see if they responded. Their background was changed by itself, at first I thought maybe I did it by accident so i looked in my downloads but i never downloaded that background before or saw it and it wasn't in my list. The background was a stick guy with arms stretched out and it read "I love you this much". It kind of floored me and shocked me as I've been questioning if she loves me. So there ya have it. I don't make much over it really..maybe it was a universe saying she indeed loves me a lot..idk. But I think it's a good thing.

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I can tell you that I've done exactly what you mentioned in your OP. I successfully manifested her back in a huge way last fall and we became so close friends. Doing everything together, making all kinds of future plans, she told me I was her best friend, etc. I wanted more of course, but she wasn't ready. She has ended up talking to another person now and that stung...I know for me personally it's been hard to stay detached from the outcome with her being in my face 24/7. I love this person, want to be with them, have this wonderful life with them, yet they don't. So it's not an easy situation to be in. I'm looking for ways to clear the negativity and focus only on end result and not the hows, whys, insecurities, doubts, etc. I think though really if you were to do this, it needs to be from a place of complete detachment for sure. Ask yourself will you be okay if that's what happens to you, if they date others or another person seriously while still wanting to be your close friend. How you will handle being detached. I'm working on it now. So any suggestions, let me have them. It's a good idea though and I can't say I don't agree with you somewhat. In the beginning we both agreed to get to know each other again slowly through friendship, we became super close which made me more attached and expecting that we were working out, that is when those doubts, and worry crept in because she wasn't making more stronger advances and moves, then she dates someone else.

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nofear10. Just relax. The choice is yours. Don't bother yourself of what everyone else will think, that's not what's important. The question is how do YOU feel about things? Don't let negative what ifs and fears overcome you. Just decide what YOU really want and go for it with a good attitude. You will be asking for more bad things if you start off things with negative fears, etc. I think you should really just take your time and if you love your ex and feel like she is right for you, go for it! At the same time, you have met someone whom you are also interested in. Well if that makes you happy, do it. You don't have to jump right back into anything quickly. You are free to take your time. Best wishes and congrats! Don't fall back into negativity and worry.

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It's really simple...you still love her and she dosnt.

lol  thanks  for  that. I  wouldn't  go  so  far  as  saying  she  doesn't  love me...but hey.

I  think  she  does. Thing is..I DONT look at her Fb. Someone else told me withiut my asking....everyone thought we were back together so they were shocked. I mainly was posting to vent about how things can drastically change so short. and was abit taken back that after such a short period, she was all googly over this person. You made some good points. I agree that I should stay away from sisituations that make me feel bad. and she probably is taking me for granted. I know im a great catch and an amazing person. It doesnt matter. I know I can have anything that I want and desire. Sometimes it helps to have outside encouragement a long the way. I felt since im not too concerned with her new person, this must be close to detachment. I believe in love and I believe in our connection. Im dating others now too.  I'm leaving the door open though. maybe she is catching up to me or vuce versa. idk. only things is I know what I feel and what I want. to be quite honest your post was a but depressing, yet it didnt even affect me hard. true sign that  I'm letting go. thanks for your reply. maybe it was a sign that she doesnt love me...who knows...but she can fall in love with me again. I cant be perfect all the time. everyone has down times. ive done really great all week. its okay to release and clear these negative thoughts. Either way ill be okay.

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 so  thought  I'd  update. Facebook is  the  devil! No,  I'm  not  friends  with  her  there,  but  we  have  mutual friends. Little  bird  told  me  that  she appears  to  be  madly  in  love  with  this  new person...:/.  Lovey  pics  with  captions  that  read  how she  has  met her perfect match..blah blah. Its  like  it  happened  overnight...Two weeks ago we  were spending  everyday  together and now this? Id  be  lying  if a bit of me wasnt concerned. my  friends  say  she  seems  happy.  I haven't  spoken  to  her  in a  week bc  shes been  gone on a trip, vacation,  with  her...out  of  the  blue  she  texted  me  tonight  to  let  me  know  she  was  home  and  ask  how  my vacay was.I politely  replied  and  she  never  responded  back. I  don't  get ppl. They are so  confusing. The Weird  thing  is, is  that I  was  not  too concerned  by  this  other person. Now,  my  friends  got me  wondering cuz  of  the  crap on fb. On  the  other  hand, I  feel  oddly  calm  and  okay  somewhat...weird.  Any  thought  loves?

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Moroccan Argan Oil for sure. Hair masks work great too! I realllllllly love the moroccan oil though. I use the Moroccan brand, not sure if youre in the states and where it's available. It's kind of pricey but it works amazing! It's a blue bottle with an M on it. I use the shampoo and conditioner as well. Use the stuff too that they make that you put on before drying it or flat ironing it. Mayonnaise - I know it sounds gross, but it works great too. Sleep in it with a plastic bag on your head and mix a raw egg with it. And of course affirmations, visualizations, and believing acting as if. Good luck with your hair!

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Actually I am LOLx3. I used to be pretty active here, but feel away for awhile. My post was very lengthy the other day, which is possibly why some didn't respond. It might have been hard to understand. I just really appreciate and am grateful for the support tonight! It means a lot to me. I don't have ANYONE in my life that is positive about this stuff. No one that knows about LoA. So I really am trying to apply it in my life. And I had some great success with it last year, really. No just with her. I gained so much money, when I wasn't even working. Out of nowhere I gained a huge amount of money 10k that I never expected from an unexpected event, end of last year. Earlier I received money before when I was without a job that I didn't expect, not once but twice. Then, I got a great job. All of that, then she came back full force into my life on her own without my instigating, it just bummed out. I'll be okay. I know. I can't say though that I don't have questions, cuz I want to know where I went wrong. So you can see how I was walking on cloud nine for so long, was so near my success story, to have a fail. But maybe I did attract this, or maybe I just am trying to hard to push things faster. I need to relax most of all and focus more on ME. I am very grateful and I agree that I have gotten some wonderful advice.

One reason I didn't post more during these months, is bc i have some superstition where if I talk about something going great, then it's bound to backfire. That's a belief I guess I should work on, but maybe if I were more actively involved, I could have continued growing in my vibration. This is a wonderful support forum.

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First of all, thank you so much to each one of you that replied. If feels great for people to care enough to post and offer advice and insight. So thank you again.

TL - I agree. It can be emotionally draining for sure. I think I have just gotten way too wrapped up in it this time, because I thought this was the real deal. Why after so long did she come back in such a strong way only to tell me this stuff again. I question myself about this and think back. Have I had doubts? YES. Have I feared she would date another instead of me? YES Have I felt that she wasn't into me romantically? YES Have I felt unworthy b/c of my looks and appearance? YES. Therefore maybe I did attract this again. Because I never truly let go. I still let the physical reality of now dictate my thoughts, which have been negative at times, at the same time remaining hopeful. I do appreciate your post, and I do not think it was negative! Do I think we can attract specific people? Yes I do, but I think it depends on letting go and letting time take it's course, not pinning dates on it and that's hard to do once you are actively involved on a day to day basis with someone on the deep level that we are. Do I feel like I have ever truly "let go"? Nope, I don't. I have been close but not fully let go. Thank you very much for your post and you keep loving yourself, that's what I am going to do, I unknowingly have put her back on the pedestal and let her rise up above me. I will be okay.

Luvingmenow - I agree, thanks for the reminder to ignore the present and thanks for the wonderful encouragement as well. Also, thanks for the reminder of the things I should be "practicing" to achieve overall balance and love for myself and others. I know that I'm a damn good catch and honestly, I have been talking to another person as well. It's in early stages, idk what will happen, but I enjoy the conversation for sure. I am open to the possibility. I am more desperate for support than I am for her at this stage. I have posted a few times and not gotten much help . I feel I am between a rock and a hard place with my choice of whether to continue a friendship with her. She is so adamant and I know it will hurt us both, and I don't want to hurt her - at the same time I wonder if I will be happy with this. Will I be okay if she is seeing someone else? Although she will respect me and keep it from my face. She is like that. I mean we have literally been together 24/7 and her phone never goes off! I had no clue she had been talking to her the last couple months! She wants it that way too. I did ask her how fair that was to the other person....she replied with why does she have to know bc she and I are only friends? I just didn't think that was right considering the feelings i have for her, I wouldn't want my girl being best friends with someone that they dated previous and still wanted them so...ya know? I have a question about something you said. If you could further clarify what you mean. You said "Remember you're not giving up your desire to have a relationship with her, only the intense focus on the outcome which is generating the feeling of lack and keeping her away." What do you mean by the focus on the outcome? Help me out there lol.

LOL -Thanks. I need to read ML story. I haven't ever read it. Maybe it would do me some good.

I feel like I definitely attracted her back for sure, but I just didn't "finish it" I got there, close, but didn't finish. Before I practiced affirmations, r/s, etc. But once I got her back in my life, i stopped those things and see what happened? When she said she wanted just friends, it kinda re spiraled me into negative self doubt etc. again.

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This is great. I hope that things work out for you! I just know that they will. Needed to read this. Thank you.

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Very Cool Story. It Seems You Detached. Thats Great! SoundS Like Things ARe Working Well! Keep It Up.

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Please, I know it's long, I need some guidance, understanding

So a few weeks back, I posted an update. Things have been progressively better over the last few months. We see each other daily, flirt, etc and even she had told me that it was okay to hold onto hope of us together one day, when before she always said never again.  I feel like things were progressing definitely. We had so much fun together, movies in bed all the time, dinner, trips out all day - just all kinds of stuff. Making plans to take trips together, etc. Things seemed to be finally coming together. I was more positive and more hopeful and believing. I still had my doubts b/c something is holding her back from going into it with me. She did sweet things for me at times, went out of her way. Things have been so close, but just didn't fully materialize yet. She and I have began to argue more b/c my patience is wearing thin. I question shady friendships of hers with ppl she has dated, yet i truly believe there is nothing there with them. They were short lived r'ships. Anyways, she has said before that it's okay to hope for us together, at the same time it isn't a guarantee and it might not happen. I still remained positive and believing b/c for the first time she said it was okay to feel hopeful, instead of saying it will never happen as she's said in the past.

Now fast forward to this week. Remember we were hanging out almost daily until the wee hours of the morning, talk all the time, etc. etc. She has remained single. But she also said after a spat, one in which she got angry for me questioning her friends, that she probably could date or talk to someone at some point, and she would prefer i just don't ask questions. I said I already told you I would no longer be around on the same level if that happens. I wouldn't hate her or be angry and would catch up once in awhile, but I would remove myself from a big part of her life. She got upset, and asked why??? why can't we keep it separate, i will still be around with you as much, i would never talk to the new person around you, text them, talk about them, rub it in your face, etc. etc. I repeated what I had already told her, that if that happened we would cross that bridge then, but most likely i'd be gone in the sense that we had been together the last couple months. She didn't understand, but we left it. No sense in arguing right? Anyways, I went over for a movie with her Sunday, on Monday she worked and normally she calls me after work and we talk long. This time I get a brief call with someone calling in and she said she will call me back, she doesn't call...the next day, she and I hang out but their is a lot of tension bc i sense there is something up. I see her again last night, but it was uncomfortable b/c i feel like she is hiding something from me and my thoughts had also turned negative, bc she has been out of her normal character all week. I have asked twice if she is trying to break away from me, if she is okay, if something has happened. she says no. I was informed that beginning this week someone has been posting flirting messages to her on fb. So it seems what i feared is in the works? Everything adds up to she has been talking to this person all week and went to see them tonight and i feel like another night earlier in the week too. Even though she is adamant that she doesn't want a relationship with anyone right now.

I don't understand the situation. Just last week I was on a meet people website chatting some ppl on my phone, my phone was going off alot, i was with her, she kept getting my phone and trying to see who i was talking to, and acting upset about it and even told my friend about it then next day like it really bothered her. Did me doing that cause this to happen with her possibly talking to someone new this week? (I was talking friendly to the ppl btw. I don't want anyone else. My profile clearly states to make friends on there) But why does she care what I am doing if she is doing this? (Although, I am not positive her and this person are dating, but I know it sure seems like it with the fb stuff, and the way she has been all week. Distant, the most unhappy she has been around me since we began talking again.

For those that don't know we dated a long time. We have been split for awhile, but have went through periods of NC and brief contact throughout. I feel spiritually connected to her. I can sense these things about her, without her even telling me. I truly feel like she loves me and part of her desires me, but something is holding her back. My friends tell me that maybe she has some more experiences to face before she can let the wall down to me and realize. She can be quite immature when it comes to emotions and is very reserved with showing her feelings.

I am at a crossroads though of what to do, she isn't aware that I know about this new girl, she told me she was going to hang with friends an hour and half away that she hangs with often. This girl and her have been somewhat friends awhile, but never like that. She lives in the city where she is visiting tonight and I'm sure they are seeing each other b.c of fb. Can't say I'm not a bit disappointed at the moment. I am questioning whether my limiting beliefs attracted this, i have some self doubt and feeling am not good enough at times and fearful. For the most part I haven't worried at all about another person though, until she acted weird.

Did I attract this really? What can I do to fix it? I am not too upset actually, I was earlier, but then I realize this must have happened for a reason, for the good of things and am trying to trust in the universe that everything is working for the good of me and my desires. I don't know if I should maintain contact, b/c she will call. I know that. Even though she isn't calling as much, she will call. What do I say? I can't be too mad right? We weren't dating so. I am just disappointed and feel like the universe or something is teasing and taunting me with my desire...it's like oh it's finally working out, its finally happening, then it's like almost there, then ohhhhh just kidding. Like oh I'm starving I really want that steak, I smell it cooking, I see it, it looks so good. I pick up my knife, pour my steak sauce, and begin to cut into it. I pick up my fork to take that first yummy bite, and someone grabs the plate right out from under me and says "Just Kidding" no steak for you.

Anyone want to help me out here please? I don't understand....

Thank you for reading! I'm so grateful for like-minded ppl in this forum. I have no others to talk to b/c no one I know is familiar with LoA, they don't get it.

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That's awesome girl. Very inspiring. Keep up the good work!

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Calm,

You are right. I KNOW that, no matter what is coming from her mouth, there has definitely been progression between us. Her actions confuse me because they don't necessarily reflect the whole "I just want to be your friend, blah blah." Maybe she is being more receptive to it, because I definitely feel that she wants more...often. I think she fights it though too. Because she doesn't go back to exes, wonders what others will think, blah blah - just my thoughts. You're right and thanks for reminding me (this is why I love this place, friendly reminders that I forgot) that we are each on our own timeline to each other, it was helpful to be reminded that.

Calm and BG - I know about the tickling, flirting, play fighting, etc. I am a woman too! I know that I don't do those things with anyone unless I like them like "that". That's why I've been so confused, aside from the planning we make together, etc. (Which I won't go into detail, but we do a lot of things that couples do together and plan them) So confusing.

I am trying to just let it roll off, the comments she made when we fought. Oh another line that irked me was her bringing up what would happen if she date someone else. Will I still be around and be okay. She said she doesn't plan to, but what if it happen cause there is no guarantee that we will work out or won't. That I won't just disappear from her and be weird. I just left it. I was being a bit pushy prior to this argument about a friend of hers that I despise who recently started contacting her again. We hate each other and she felt like I was trying to control  her, I know that's what brought this up.

Anyways, thank you both and if you can add anything else or anyone else wants to chime in - that'd be great.

Love to all!

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