Yes another post about getting your ex back.

[Phoenix]

So here is my story...
I have fallen in love with a wonderful woman and she has with me. She is married, but was on her way to getting divorced after being unhappy for a very long time. We spent some wonderful times with each other and there are also many, many signs that we are soul mates. But then she out of the blue wants to stay with her husband for the sake of her kids. Her and I both know this is meant to be for us, how we feel and way too many things pointing to the fact. Yet she stays with him. She has told me that she wants to leave him and that we will be together. Things are not bad for us, we talk every day. We have the normal ups and downs that everyone does, but for the most part we are ok. Yes things are not the same for us, we have lost a lot of the closeness we had before she went back to him. Every day she tells me she loves me and wants to be with me. I have heard this as well from people she knows, so I know it's not just something she says to me to keep me happy. She does not know they talk to me. Yet here we are, another man getting the best of her while I get scraps (read that line in someone elses post here, just thought it fit well to what I'm feeling) She tells me every day that this will happen for us and really does want it. Yet every day she is with him. She tells me just to be happy and focus on the fact that is will happen and believe it to be true. (unintentional LOA...lol)
I know she loves her kids and does not want them hurt, but people with kids get divorced all the time. The fact that she still shares his bed and all the other things that go with it used to make me crazy.
I do understand LOA and have been studying it in one form or another for about 30 years. I have manifested things many times. Once within 30min.
I'm just at such a loss with this situation. It's not like a normal break up, where you no longer see or hear from the other person. Or where they are in your environment every day but not together.
We talk every day and it's wonderful. She is in love with me. She does want to marry me and spend her life with me.
Yet she is still with him.
And to make make things worse, he is not the kind of man who she even really likes. Yes I'm sure she was interested in him on some levels, but only really married him because they had a child together and for some other personal reason that I shall not mention that left her feeling vulnerable. She has told me as much. They were together for 8 years before that and she felt no need to marry him even though he had asked.
She has told me she was scared about the situation between us. If getting a divorce was the right thing to do even if she was unhappy. I thought she was long over this, but I wonder if this was what pushed her back to him, as well as the kids.
So what can I do?
We are very close and do not want to lose that. And I use the word want, because I know the difference between that and can't. So how can I stay so close every day, yet be detached from the outcome. More so when it's something she wants as well.
Have read posts on this forum many times and when I was asking for signs the other day it lead me back here to a post with someone going through and almost identical thing. And words used in the post and replies to it, as well as many of the names of the posters were far too many signs to ignore.
So here I am looking for help and thankful for any that come my way.

[Phoenix]

I just want to add, as you can see it is a tricky situation. There has been no breakup, we are still wanting each other and loving each other, we talk every day and aside from some shifts in our relationship, we still both want the same outcome. We are just not were we should be and both want to be right now. I'm trying to figure out what happened and help things work out for the positive.

[57angel]

Phoenix, love only give what is best! I understand that you both are so very much in love for each other, both of you need to give honor to that love by protecting it the best way you can. You have been a great, easy manifestor - you will do great in manifesting the kind of relationship you want with her.

[Mariposa, (KnJ)]

Where you should be?

You are exactly where you should be for right now....you are just NOT where YOU want to be.

I have been in your situation exactly!!  Only I am a woman and he is a man and we have known each other since HS....over 30 years.

The thing is here, you have to do what SHE wants.  She doesn't really want to leave because if she did, she would.  That is a plain and simple truth!

Now the reason why, it is because for right now she has security with her husband.  It is VERY PAINFUL AND HARD to get a divorce.  I am guessing you are single, single people don't always understand how difficult this is.....getting a divorce.  She needs to be given the time and space to make this decision for herself in her own time.

You need to decide if you are willing to wait or not, regardless of how long it takes her.  I can see you are frustrated with the situation.....you want what you want and you would like it sooner rather than later but you are used to thinking of you and she has her family, friends, and loved ones to think of. 

This will work itself out but it won't be easy.  Divorce is never easy.....or very rarely. 

Sorry this probably isn't a ton of help and my situation turned out exactly how I expected so far to a degree but my situation is different in some ways than yours because I am much farther along in the process but I can tell you we broke up in Oct. 2010 and we are not together now.  He did divorce his wife. 

Our situation is still in the works.  This type of situation is so different because you are with someone who is unavailable and has a family and history.......it's very different than two people who are essentially single. 

You are welcome to pm me if you would like but I won't discuss my situation on the board any further than I have.

You can be with her......you can attract her and have the life you desire, you just have to know it won't be easy. 

[Phoenix]

You are a smart woman and I guess so is she. She did say things very close to this to me. But never really the "why" of why she stays. It's nice to hear these inner thoughts from a woman as I don't get to understand them from her. And yes you are right I am single. Many things have happened in both our lives, even up to today, to show us that we are soul mates. She knows this, but made a choice to follow the path she did. It confuses me that she wants me, but does not want to leave him. Thank you for shedding some light on that for me. She has told me she needs time to figure all this out, but that it will happen. And she told me from day one this would not be easy.
When she first told me she was staying, I felt weak and needy and powerless. I did all the things that go along with that. it may have weakened the bond between us some, i do think we worked that out and she knows that, that was just a reaction and not who I am. I have worked on myself and overcome this and she says she does see it.
Thank you for this, it has opened my eyes to some things.
I still believe strongly in this and do want it.
Yes I'll pm you, it would be nice to have someone to talk to. And share with.