Author Topic: Why couples break up - a LOA interpretation! (Read 3634 times)

57angel · « **Reply #45 on:** December 02, 2010, 02:20:24 PM »

@Love, I will look forward to your latest installment

that will make me infected with your love as well...Indeed, there is something amazing for everybody here in this forum, that will make us all incredibly happy, cheers

UpLOAding · « **Reply #46 on:** December 05, 2010, 06:41:37 PM »

Yeah, keep us updates =)

UpLOAding · « **Reply #47 on:** December 29, 2010, 06:35:18 AM »

Right after Christmas, two of my best friends were dumped by their girlfriends (on the same date... creepy!)

One of the girlfriends is also a good friend of mine, and just 2 days before the break up happened, we were discussing about how to avoid break ups. She never mentioned anything about her BF, and until that seemed to be one of the most successful relationships I ever knew of.

She said this:
Many relationships fail because one of the partners feels as if he/she is doing too much and therefore feels taken for granted.
Even if there is love, the practical aspects of the relationship must also be in order.
I always visit him at his new work place (in another city), and he never comes to see me. Where's the balance?

So, once again: don't neglect your partner, keep empathising with them. Don't always think about yourselves.
And when you give them something, do it with your heart, not because you want something in return.

Magdog, MD, Mr. Best Luck · « **Reply #48 on:** December 30, 2010, 01:37:53 AM »

My take of why people break is easy, vibration match, and thought match. Simply put. Not a complicated thing. Also, when we do not love ourselves or put ourselves on our own pedestal, nobody is attracted to us, or stays attracted, not talkin selfishness, talking be the best you can be, and love yourself and be proud because of it.

UpLOAding · « **Reply #49 on:** December 30, 2010, 04:43:36 AM »

Quote from: magdog2765 on December 30, 2010, 01:37:53 AM

My take of why people break is easy, vibration match, and thought match. Simply put. Not a complicated thing.

Simply put, this is what I said + I suggest how to uphold such match.
But still, thoughts keep changing, therefore there needs to be stronger foundation than simple "match" for a relationship than being matched.

Quote

Also, when we do not love ourselves or put ourselves on our own pedestal, nobody is attracted to us, or stays attracted, not talkin selfishness, talking be the best you can be, and love yourself and be proud because of it.

Dunno man, when we love ourselves too much we neglect each other. That makes them proud of themselves, and start growing cold, and then slowly apart. Makes most sense to me, from what I see around the place.

Vicki Christina · « **Reply #50 on:** December 30, 2010, 05:26:32 AM »

Up, I think MD clarified his statement of love ourselves with his addition of "not talkin selfishness, talking be the best you can be, and love yourself and be proud because of it."

Otherwise, I see your point...

Sweet Spirit · « **Reply #51 on:** December 30, 2010, 06:02:43 AM »

There is no such thing as loving ourselves too much.

I love myself too much to EVER be hurt again. I will not put up walls or barriers but I will not fall in love blindly to the point it would hurt me if I were to be rejected. Moreover, I will not chase anyone because if they want me they can be the pursuer. I will put myself on the pedestal because I am worthy! I can forgive myself and be at peace. I believe if I love myself I can stop punishing myself for what went wrong in the relationship. Whether he forgives me or can stop blaming me is up to him, for those who blame others and can not forgive and forget the past are only going to be miserable. I did the right thing by putting myself and my family first. He did not like that so he ran away. I feel good about that and I wish him well in all he does. I am affirming that I be the best I can be and that he does the same with or without me. You know we all have it in us to be GREAT people for that is how we are designed. If you strive to be the best you can be, there are no limits to your greatness!!!!

Magdog, MD, Mr. Best Luck · « **Reply #52 on:** December 30, 2010, 06:25:33 AM »

Bravo Sweet

UpLOAding · « **Reply #53 on:** December 30, 2010, 06:28:29 AM »

Quote from: Sweet Spirit on December 30, 2010, 06:02:43 AM

Moreover, I will not chase anyone because if they want me they can be the pursuer.

Hmmm... but what if nobody will ever want to chase you since they want to be pursued?

Magdog, MD, Mr. Best Luck · « **Reply #54 on:** December 30, 2010, 07:16:06 AM »

Load,

What if you really had everyone's best intention at heart versus hurting people with your comments. You pulled the same stuff with me. She is letting go, and making peace with it. You strike me as very unhappy, and I send you love to help that, what if we do not want to have you act in this way on this forum?

MD

Magdog, MD, Mr. Best Luck · « **Reply #55 on:** December 30, 2010, 07:23:54 AM »

Quote from: UpLOAding on December 30, 2010, 04:43:36 AM

Quote from: magdog2765 on December 30, 2010, 01:37:53 AM
My take of why people break is easy, vibration match, and thought match. Simply put. Not a complicated thing.
Simply put, this is what I said + I suggest how to uphold such match.
But still, thoughts keep changing, therefore there needs to be stronger foundation than simple "match" for a relationship than being matched.

Quote
Also, when we do not love ourselves or put ourselves on our own pedestal, nobody is attracted to us, or stays attracted, not talkin selfishness, talking be the best you can be, and love yourself and be proud because of it.
Dunno man, when we love ourselves too much we neglect each other. That makes them proud of themselves, and start growing cold, and then slowly apart. Makes most sense to me, from what I see around the place.

The more I love myself the more I love others, I have lived it. When you are happy with yourself you radiate and draw others and things to you, and they feel your love. That has been my experience. Your aura shines, if you view loving yourself as a negative that is what you will experience and give off in the form of neglect and conceit.

Sweet Spirit · « **Reply #56 on:** December 30, 2010, 08:50:55 AM »

@uploading,

On second thought I DO NOT want to be chased after. Guys who chase after me turn me off. If I wanted to be caught I would stop running. I was speaking of my ex when I said let him pursue me. But really he would not have to because I would not run from him.If it feeds your ego to be chased then good for you! That is conceit in my opinion so my quote :

Quote from: Sweet Spirit on December 30, 2010, 06:02:43 AM

Moreover, I will not chase anyone because if they want me they can be the pursuer.

is entirely WRONG and I would like to retract that statement because like you I appear conceited by saying that.

NO ONE should chase after anyone! It is a sign of desperation and if you can't attract someone without chasing them, then I guess you you just don't have that magnetism. I want to attract people NOT repel them! I will push them farther away if I chase after them. GET it?

You attract people by drawing them to you. I suppose if you chased them then they would be drawing you to them. But why chase them? If they wanted you then they would be still so you could come together naturally.

I know I am done chasing my ex. He knows where I am and he knows what I want. If he wants me he will come to me, but who knows? By then, I may have changed my mind because I have let go. He has played this stupid cat and mouse game with me for a while now. he breaks up with me, wants no contact, contacts me, breaks up with me again, tells me to let go and forget about me, contacts me wanting to see me, I say there's no need, he puts himself on a dating site, I contact him, he says he wants to see me,I say ok, then I put myself on the dating site, he stops contact and wont reply to any of the three messages I send him. we both give up and let go. I'm tired of the game. Let LOA do its thing now. It knows what we want and what is best!

loveofabundance · « **Reply #57 on:** December 30, 2010, 10:58:36 AM »

@Up, it's biological (I have a degree in the subject) for the man to pursue the woman. Look at you slobbering (meant respectfully) all over your girl. It's human nature and there's nothing wrong with it!

Sweet Spirit · « **Reply #58 on:** December 30, 2010, 12:01:51 PM »

I think perhaps it would boost his ego and confidence if he were the one being pursued?

But as a woman, I do not want to do the chasing. Call me old fashioned but I do not need to chase a guy and that comes in the form of contacting him as well. Let him be the one to contact me. I'm just not comfortable with it unless he's a good friend, a serious relationship or he asks me to call him (and that includes returning his call.) And Dee is right. The man should be the pursuer and if the woman does not respond after many attempts, the man should back off and give her space or after awhile start pursuing someone else.

I wish the one I was interested in would pursue me but its the ones I am NOT interested in that are chasing me. Maybe that's why it feels like they are chasing me, because I am running from them?

hmmmmm.......

Why do most men feel like they need to be in a relationship all the time any way? it wasn't two damn weeks after my ex broke up with me he was looking for someone else! And men seem to go on the rebound quicker too and that's when people get hurt more often.

You know what people? we would not have breakups if we do things right before entering into a relationship. The key is to love oneself before you can love others!!! People tend to attract losers and cheaters when they don't have self respect, and self respect comes from loving yourself and not compromising your integrity.

And furthermore, there is such a thing as being selfish while not loving yourself. I know that for a fact because I did that at one time. But not anymore.....

UpLOAding · « **Reply #59 on:** October 24, 2011, 04:00:27 AM »

Here is another useful thread I had written long time ago, in a period I feel during which I was much more optimistic, mentally and emotionally balanced and confident about myself and my ideals.

I wanted to put the ideas I had written to the attention of the new members as well and hear any new developments or insights you might have on this topic, considering that I wrote this long time ago and by now my actual lifestyle and life quality has changed (worsened) a lot.

I feel drawn to following these ideas I had written about in the past.