We have found the answer the solution to this all, I am sure of it, and Grateful

[Christy Michelle]

Sweet, I think I need to print that!! The paralell dimension, uff, love that idea!! It helps us to make peace with not having what we want right now (the "reality") and how it feels, with "but ill make it feel better THIS way" (paralel dimension) and you dnt feel like lying to yourself/resistance because is a makeup story that you ALLOW yourself to create but still being aware of your reality and so you feel ok because your not lying to yourself.

Damn I hate not been able to explain better what i want to say because of language issues...

[Miracles]

Sweet Spirit,  I actually saved your reply in a document on my computer, in order to get back to it whenever i feel lost or confused!

I'll stop trying to control how it goes, and leave it to be repaired by the Universe. I trust all will be great! 

and i really love your profile picture!

Much love.

[Sweet Spirit]

Miracles, VC, Peter, and Christy Michelle,

Ya'll are all so wonderful. Thank you so much for your kind words. You know I believe the creator of the universe (or God if you will,) is the one I should give glory and thanks to. He speaks to my higher self ( In much the same way Abraham speaks to and through  Esther Hicks,) and these ideas just come to me from a higher power.

As for that parallel universe, I have often heard that it is the other course or direction our life would have or could take in the future by the choices we make or the outcomes of the events that occur in this reality or dimension. Like Quantum mechanics maybe? Anyway, in that other dimension, Ken and I are married. I am feeling and imagining myself as his wife and him as my husband and I am asking that it be reality. I am not desperate for that to happen but it is a desire of mine that I believe is very possible irregardless of the fact that he says he never wants to be married ever again.  Okay, so I am not putting a time limit on it because I know he has to trust that our relationship is meant to last indefinitely and that we are indeed a perfect match. So I let go, and I trust that in the universe's perfect timing when Ken is ready, we will be husband and wife. Right now I am so grateful that we are together in a wonderful relationship. After all, we have everything that is required of a marriage (we live together in harmony,) except the only difference is I don't share his last name and we don't have that legal piece of paper between us......yet.

[angel_star]

Yes it is hard for us to focus on "what is going to happen" versus "what is happening" at present. We tend to focus on the not having it because in reality we don't have it at present. Think of it in terms of" the same you and your ex" in another dimension that is paralleling the one you are physically feeling yourself in right now. In that other dimension, you and your boyfriend (he isn't your ex in that dimension) are happy and have a perfect relationship. That is happening right now in another plane, dimension or universe. All of our desires are happening right now and being enacted in another dimension that is paralleling this dimension that we are physically in! if you want to be with him and not someone else, feel (not necessarily visualize) yourself in that other dimension; the one where your perfect relationship is happening right now.

Ok Sweet, so people have already told you how beautiful this post. I am also joining the fan club! Its lovely and beautifully told. This concept of parallel dimension blew my mind the first time I heard it from a friend. But it just makes believing so easy. The fact that I, in a parallel dimension, am living with all my desires already gives me goosebumps! If I cant make believe that I have my desires right now, I imagine myself enjoying all that in the parallel dimension. This seems believable for me without conflicting the so-called 'reality', and it helps in bringing out the right feelings of having it all now, which is vital for manifestation. Thanks a lot for sharing this Sweet Spirit! Your username is apt for you

[Vicki Christina]

Did anyone download this video?  The link only has audio now.  It is still OK, but not as good as the video. 

[57angel]

Thank you Sweet Spirit for sharing what you did to get to that very happy and loving relationship with Ken, really inspiring and so informative mmmm this deserves more than 50 karma points hehehe

[Sweet Spirit]

Thank you 57 angel.

I think it is very important for both people to be happy on their own before they can be happy with each other. I have learned to do that but I don't think Ken has learned that. Last night he told me that he is happy "for now." He said that because he has a job now he is happy. If he were to find himself without a job again that would cause him unhappiness even if he still had me; so because he can not be happy unless he has a job, he would not hesitate to leave me again and go to wherever he finds another job. He will keep searching for whatever brings him happiness because he has not discovered where that happiness lies.  So now I am trying to prepare myself for that day when he feels he is no longer happy. He said that if he were unhappy, he will move on to wherever he can be happy again. I am trying to become detached without showing indifference because if he senses I don't care, he will leave for certain. I love him and want him to stay and be happy but I can not create happiness for him even though I have tried. I love myself too much to go through the pain of another break up so if he leaves again I will move on and ask him to let me go forever.
I wish I could use LOA to have a future with him but if he does not want a future with me I need to accept that and stay happy by myself. He does not know that what he said is bothering me. he is leaving tonight to go visit his friend for the weekend. She broke her ankle and she wants him to stay with her awhile. He said he can't go for more than a weekend because of the commitment to his job (not our relationship.) This is the first day he has taken off in 28 days and he is going to go up and surprise her because she misses him.  I am trying to be understanding but he does not know I am trying to detach myself from the relationship. he thinks my indifference has something to do with the fact that he is taking his first weekend off to be with her. That is part of it, but he doesn't know I am bothered by what he said last night (about being happy" for now.") and I am also bothered by what he said last week about how even though we are in a committed relationship, I should think of him as a boyfriend who comes and goes. Well if he wants to go, I am letting him go, and this next time will be forever.

So how do I become detached without showing indifference? That is very hard to hide your feelings when you are living with a person, but I need to protect my heart from being broken again. I could say, "He will be happy with me forever"' and keep affirming that every single day, but will that make it happen? I guess for now I will be grateful for the time we have "for now"' because it could end at any moment when he loses that temporary happiness........

I will start another thread on the forum later about that because I really need advice on what to do. I am so grateful I have all of you to encourage me because everyone needs support and encouragement and I am not getting that from my relationship or from my family or friends.

Peace and love to you all!

[Vicki Christina]

Hello, Sweet Spirit.   I hear the fear in your mind as I read your message.   I am sorry that fear and anxiety are with you at this time as we have all been so happy for your relationship.   Find your way back to the person you were before he came to visit and stayed.  He did not have a job then.   You were in love with your life and your connection with grandchildren.   You were focused on love for a new baby.  You radiated love!  You were proud of your school success.  We were proud of you and still remain happy for your blessings. 
 
Everyone has their own way to eliminate the negative, but the Heartmath method has you do "feelingazation"s on visions and thoughts which will engage the heart to feel love.  The video in the beginning of this post was awesome for a short practice on this method combined with Sedona.   The link seems to only have audio now, but it is still good.   I wonder if Magdog has downloaded the video in it's complete form.  Hugs and love,  VC

[lise]

You mention a couple of times, he does not know I think this or I feel this. Is there any reason why you haven't told him the way you feel about what he said? Sometimes keeping it in can make you feel more anxious. He thinks you're narked about him visiting his friend and that's only part of the reason - the potential for misunderstanding becomes limitless. How can he potentially alter his actions if he doesn't know what it is you're actually concerned about.

I don't think when you're in a relationship you should be trying to be detached from the relationship. It's one thing to try and make someone responsible for your happiness but that's not what you're doing. So I don't see any reason to try to be detached from it especially when you're still in it. 

I would try and speak to him when you feel ready and calm. There is nothing wrong with expressing how you feel rather than wait until he's going if and when he gets a job elsewhere and then say, that's it's over once and for all.

Plus just because he said he would move on if his job went doesn't mean he will. Didn't he previously say he wouldn't live with your daughter and baby, didn't he say the relationship is over. what we say and what we do aren't always the same thing.

Don't lose faith in you. You seem to have given in to what him saying being inevitable.

[Vicki Christina]

I agree with Lise, and try to find your way back to your heart!   

[Believing Love]

Yes it is hard for us to focus on "what is going to happen" versus "what is happening" at present. We tend to focus on the not having it because in reality we don't have it at present. Think of it in terms of" the same you and your ex" in another dimension that is paralleling the one you are physically feeling yourself in right now. In that other dimension, you and your boyfriend (he isn't your ex in that dimension) are happy and have a perfect relationship. That is happening right now in another plane, dimension or universe. All of our desires are happening right now and being enacted in another dimension that is paralleling this dimension that we are physically in! if you want to be with him and not someone else, feel (not necessarily visualize) yourself in that other dimension; the one where your perfect relationship is happening right now.

Hi ...
if we are living in the other side where our relationship is fine .. so,that is not attached to the outcome ??

[Sweet Spirit]

Hi believing Love,
I think that it is more about using visualizations with positivity. And knowing that your perfect relationship is happening in another dimension could bring faith that it is a possibility. That other dimension could be looked at  like what would of or might have happened if the relationship were to take a different course or maybe if one's life would have taken a different direction, or what may happen if one's life were in alignment with the parallel dimension. Those are just my thoughts anyway. I am not much one for visualizations myself unless they are memories of the good times of the past, but then again I think those are the memories that tend to make us sad and miss what we once had, thereby causing longing and desperation. I have not come to expect much these days and I think that helps me stay detached better, even though I have struggled with it lately.

[Sweet Spirit]

VC and Lise,

Thank you for your encouragement and support. I have posted a new discussion thread about the need for my detachment while in a relationship with Ken. I appreciate all your kind words and it has helped me more than you will ever know! I have come to a few conclusions and have decided what I need to do. I know that whatever happens will be for a good reason, so I will embrace the future with or without Ken.

[Magdog, MD, Mr. Best Luck]

Sweet,


I would not focus on what he is saying, Ken is up and down, or has been, attract what you want and be grateful. People say things all the time, and then change their minds, or may mean something else. Go with the flow, it is best, I am emailing you something and you tell me what you think. I have not been on here much lately because I am busy, but when I come across things of value I post, Go with the flow, focus on what you want, and be happy. Your life is about you, not you and Ken, he may stay, he may go, if you want him to stay, do affirmations that I am grateful he is staying, and you know the rest, and let go or any fear, frustration, anger, or desperation, stay in a happy place. Don't Worry, be Happy, that is letting go really at its purest form in my opinion. And do not be mistaken, all of this is opinion with scientific proof to a point. Quantum Physics, you send the energy and let go. And also you stay happy to have the energy to send, and like attracts like. Remember you are a Ken magnet.


Peter 

[Sweet Spirit]

Thank you Peter for reminding me of how he changes his mind so often.

yes he changed his mind about coming back to stay with me while my daughter and the baby were here, but was that because he was tired of living with his best friend 100 miles away and not being able to find a job up there? Well we know he can't stay in one place very long and I think she was starting to get on his nerves. So i was his only other option. (Glad I could be here for him AGAIN.) My family and friends are really starting to lose respect for me because I allow myself to put up with his uncertainty; and they really don't respect him much anymore either.

I just have to wonder why he feels the need to come and go all the time. I really can not live like that and I will not live with a man who feels I am not important enough to stand by when there are so many who will cherish me andlove me enough to stand by me in the tough times.

I apologize for my negativity and ungratefulness. I really need to get my vibration back up and start feeling love and peace again. I am grateful that the universe has a holding pattern/time delay, so we can change our request and way of thinking. We need that time delay because those negative thoughts are driven by impulse and despair and sometimes we don't think about attracting carefully so I will search my heart more for what it is I really want, and hopefully whatever I decide will become a reality.