Author Topic: This lady drives me crazy (Read 1662 times)

FruityLoops · « **Reply #15 on:** June 12, 2012, 02:51:00 AM »

Saying you can;t love someone or have someone love you until you love yourself doesn't seem true at all to me though.

How did I meet her in the first place if I wasn't in a place of loving myself? How did she come to care for me if I wasn't caring for myself?

We all know people who are adored but hate themselves. Teen girls with low self esteem even when they are popular and well liked and loved.

JustCallMeMrsJohnson · « **Reply #16 on:** June 12, 2012, 03:29:38 AM »

Confidence is a very attractive thing. It affects many parts of our lives, although we may not think so: the way we stand, walk, talk, appear to other people, what goals we accomplish. In LOA, the confidence to KNOW you are going to get what you desire and concentrating on that and not the opposite can be the difference between achieving it or not.

I know I have tired of constantly telling someone how wonderful they are. No one wants to do that all day, every day. If you are showing her the same mindset you are showing here, perhaps you are wearing her down and turning her off. No one wants to be someone's EVERYTHING. Not only that, it's not only impossible to be everything to someone, it's draining and stifling. I've been there. Our lives are like pizzas: portioned into different slices. A relationship is one and there is work, hobbies, friends, family, etc. No one should be 100% of your life and vice versa.

Yes, of course there are things about you that she liked. I am sure you are quite the person. But we have to be the amazing beings that we are with or without the people we love. Caring for someone shouldn't keep you from being who you are or growing, love.

Just because she doesn't want to or can't see your wonderful qualities doesn't mean you don't have them.

FruityLoops · « **Reply #17 on:** June 12, 2012, 04:02:36 AM »

How can I have confidence in this if it doesn't work? I want it to, I do what I can, but I have never had a positive experience with it. I get my hopes up for nothing and turn up more depressed after each try because it still hasn't worked.

I love this woman and I don't want to lose her.

She brings out the best in me and although I can be insecure, when I am with her, the confidence and happiness is there. There is no effort required, I am a totally different person when she is with me.

Free bird · « **Reply #18 on:** June 12, 2012, 11:18:59 AM »

Look Bro........if she is one for u........prove ur worth to her...........many other frenz have tried explaining u to love ur self...........but tel one thing point blank, do u love her, do u trust the love between u n her..............i guess the answer is no, tht is the reason y u desperate.............buddy y do want to c her miserable with someone like u, who cribbing, crying, desperate, stuck up, doesn't know how to live ur life, doesn't have a self respect n all...............coz if u really love her u would want to bcum the man of dreams, who is charming, exciting, who is strong enough to come out any situation, who man enough to hold back for his self respect.............buddy be a man who she gets attracted as well and it doesn't have to b one sided.............work on being a man for her...........work on urself to be the one for her........

If u love her u will do it, no matter how n no matter wat.............u will do it for ur love, if u truly love her............rest is on u, fight for ur love by being a man she would fall for and not just a regular guy cribbing abt his lost love. Its on u bro.........let go of the queries in ur mind like how, when, what............trust wat we say, trust ur GOD to make things right, trust the universe and mostly trust ur love........just focus on being the man of her dreams and not just some regular guy

JustCallMeMrsJohnson · « **Reply #19 on:** June 12, 2012, 12:40:14 PM »

My (now ex) boyfriend broke up with me. He told me I need to make him want me. I was crushed...for about a DAY.

After I had a good cry, I picked myself up, brushed myself off, and went for a spa day. Then shopping. Nails done, new hair color, new clothes and shoes, the WHOLE deal. A few days later, I strutted into work and every head turned (we worked together in a club) - including his. After a few days he saw that not only other guys wanted to scoop me up but that I was amenable to BEING scooped up by one of them. He had to go through a lot to get me back.

This is a great example of being careful about what you wish for. He's the one who threw the gauntlet down! LMAO...

Free bird · « **Reply #20 on:** June 12, 2012, 05:41:54 PM »

great going............simply perfect for all those wanting their exes back

FruityLoops · « **Reply #21 on:** June 15, 2012, 11:16:32 PM »

I am improving myself, but I am still upset she isn't with me.

/How can she see that I have changed if she doesn't communicate with me?

And I wasn't this way when I was with her. I was happy and confident and much different.

Free bird · « **Reply #22 on:** June 16, 2012, 03:35:11 PM »

U are not improving............u lack trust and believe, i agree its seems difficult to understand how will it happen.........but this whr u have to trust the universe, that it will bring ur desire to u, it is ur vibrations tht will bring her back to u..........so that is whr u need to wrk on them, ever imagined how does it happen tht without knowing some1 u start getting negative vibes..........that is the impact of vibrations..............she will get to knw tht u have changed thru ur vibrations, if u r positive, confident and happy those are vibrations u will transmit to her, n she'l get to knw............if carry on with ur desperation, remember she is getting tht too and my friend will only move her apart.

JustCallMeMrsJohnson · « **Reply #23 on:** June 17, 2012, 01:05:40 AM »

Quote from: FruityLoops on June 12, 2012, 04:02:36 AM

How can I have confidence in this if it doesn't work? I want it to, I do what I can, but I have never had a positive experience with it. I get my hopes up for nothing and turn up more depressed after each try because it still hasn't worked.

I love this woman and I don't want to lose her.

She brings out the best in me and although I can be insecure, when I am with her, the confidence and happiness is there. There is no effort required, I am a totally different person when she is with me.

As long as you are desperate about getting her and trying, YOU WILL NOT GET HER. You are putting that energy out and as long as you are, she will get further and further from you. Work on detaching yourself and changing the energy that you are presently putting out so you can achieve what you are desiring. A year from now you can be with the woman you love or you can be more upset than you are now, without her (and knowing it was your own actions that caused it). Which would you rather have?

mixtress · « **Reply #24 on:** June 17, 2012, 04:04:00 AM »

I wholeheartedly agree with the advice you have been given from the other members so I won't reiterate what has already been said. I just want you to know that I have been in your shoes, I have felt what you are currently feeling. I felt sad reading your responses, because I can understand all too well that feeling of desperation and the belief that that women/man is the only source of happiness.. when in reality, he/she isn't.

Let me tell you something, my ex ended things with me 2.5 months ago due to 'not feeling the same' about us. Two weeks ago over something that had to do with my own insecurities I called him. I drove myself mad for 3 days in a row, the more he didn't reply the more desperate I became. I emailed, texts, left a voicemail. And you know what? No reply. Nothing at all even till now. Did I feel rejected, hurt, desperate for a response? I sure did. But after letting myself calm down and rethinking things over. I just feel silly for being so desperate. Actually the time apart has only made me realize that I did indeed but him on a pedestal (just as you are doing with your ex) when we were together. I'm sure our exes felt flattered for a short period, but put yourself in their shoes. Having someone make you their everything, make you the upmost importance can and will become stifling. Because whether you are consciously aware of it or not, you become a needy person causing your ex to only want to get away. I bet she didn't response to your message because she knew that you were only desperate for a reply, that you were desperate for any reason for contact.

Yes, I too know what it was like to not have hobbies, not be very good at anything therefore leading me to think that my ex was the only source of my happiness. But making him my #1 source of happiness only lead him to be unhappy. Don't put that pressure on your woman. This is a cliche line but if you love someone, let them go..

By the way, I was in love with my ex for 10 years before he finally took action, noticed me, and pursued me. That in itself was proof to me that the Universe does listen to my prayers and wishes. It just brings that person or thing to you only when they feel that you are ready for it. Just let go, and let God. Good luck to you and I hope that in soon time you too, will take your ex off that pedestal and learn to love yourself first. If I can do it, anyone else can too.

Mariposa, (KnJ) · « **Reply #25 on:** June 17, 2012, 05:32:07 AM »

Hey there FruityLoopy!! How about you stop making excuses and start doing some reading!

This is a Law of Attraction forum and being that we practice what we preach.

So get on board and here is a wonderful book (free) to get you started and on better footing!

You want to know how to get the woman of your dreams, read it, enjoy it, believe it, be it!!

http://www.successmanual.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/The-Power-of-Your-Subconscious-Mind-by-Joseph-Murphy-SMSE-2010.pdf

Mariposa, (KnJ) · « **Reply #26 on:** June 17, 2012, 06:20:57 AM »

Here's is something else that might help you.

http://gratitudeplanet.com/2010/02/23/the-emotional-scale-a-different-%E2%80%9Ctwist-%E2%80%9D/

FruityLoops · « **Reply #27 on:** June 18, 2012, 10:59:47 PM »

I can't not be desperate when I am desperate. All I want is for her to contact me.

I just want to talk to her.

I want to die without her in my life. You don't understand how good she is for me. I need her. I need her, I need her. I do. I can't make it without her.

Please, if you can use the LOA, get her to contact me. I can't do it and I cannot do this anymore.

I can't live without her. I can't go another day without contact from her.

If I don't hear from her soon, I'm giving up on life. That's it. I can't take losing love again and again. I have tried to change for years, and I can't. I've gone to psychiatrists and psychologists, and done all I can and it never works. I just want this one person to care about me, in the slightest bit. I can't even have that. Is a message in 10 days too much to ask for?

If this life is meant to be good and abundant, then it will prove itself to be. If it doesn't, I don't want this life.

Mariposa, (KnJ) · « **Reply #28 on:** June 19, 2012, 12:04:23 AM »

Oh JEEZ!! Pull yourself together MAN!!

You create your reality and you have created this mess you have made.

Why would anyone contact someone who is behaving so pathetically?

No offence, but I gave you wonder tools to help yourself, none of us can do this for you, only you can help her come back, ONLY YOU!!!

Just an FYI, I was where you are last year at this exact time and I too felt hopeless and desperate and I too thought of ending my life but I found this forum and it saved my life!! If you apply the principles and practices and just try, you too can find yourself happier then you have ever imagined and you can do it without her.

I haven't spoken to my guy in a year, it was a year on May 2nd. That doesn't mean I won't though.

I am not saying this to hurt you but to help you and if you decide that you really CAN NOT do it, you can not adhere to the principals and practices of LOA and if you decide that you are just too desperate to help yourself, please call the suicide hotline....DO NOT CONTINUE TO POST HERE PLEASE.

Need help? In the U.S., call 1-800-273-8255
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline

We can not help you if you are UNWILLING to help yourself.

Good luck.

Mr Brightside · « **Reply #29 on:** June 19, 2012, 12:07:46 AM »

I don’t think anyone will respond to your suicidal post, but I will give you my advice only because I’ve been where you are now. First you are not listening to what people are telling you on here, trust me the advice is very good and valid, but you are so consumed by this that you can’t see the situation in a rational way. I was there, I gave up on myself and everything, I didn’t think I could go another day without seeing her or talking. I felt like my life was pointless, but not until I snapped out of it did things start to change.

Think of it this way, you kill yourself and she might call you the next day. What if she wants to date you again in a month, or a year, how is this behavior going to help you. What is she meets you in 6 months, only to realize you did nothing and changed nothing in your life. Why would she want to come back to that?

Yes I’ve been where you are now, and yes we got back together. I did all the stupid stalker shit, from calling to going to her work. I even called her friends and family, yes I was an idiot. I went on meds, wanted to give up on life, would sit in my room and let the time pass waiting for nothing. Then I woke up and said I’m better than this.. started to focus on my career, school, lost weight, started to go out, met new people, started to date other girls (nothing serious but it was a huge benefit). Guess what she wondered where I went, where is that desperate guy who was graveling at her feet. Well that guy had better shit to do, and she finally clued in. I was no longer a big fat ZERO in her eyes, but someone who had his shit together. She started to call, wanted to see me, got angry I was dating even though she had a boyfriend. Before she didn’t answer my calls and now she wanted to see me almost every day, and then finally the day I said I don’t want her anymore… she asked me to be her boyfriend again.

There you go, I just summed up LoA for you and how to not only get your life together but increase the chances of getting her back 1000X.