question

[goosedown]

Hello all, I'm new to this forum.

As I read on some websites, they say that you cannot control other's mind. Everyone has his/her free will. But here I read that if you truly love someone, that person will love you back. Then what if in his free will, he does not want to be with me? What if he's not the vibrational match? Can true love change that?

LOA states that "like attracts like". But a lot of times, I observe that opposite things attract each other. For example, magnetic poles unlikes attract. Likes repel. People also tend to find what they lack in their mates. How can you explain those contradictions?

[TeletubbieJellyPie]

Honestly, very honestly, I think that people can control others' minds. Even unconsciously, we always have a certain amount of influence over the thoughts and decisions of those we interact with.

I also think that there is a substantial amount of "control", otherwise there would not exist techniques such as subliminal advertising, but even normal advertising and marketing strategies are designed to influence others' mind.
How to make a product more attractive? How to make people more likely to buy it?
etc.

I think the same happens among human beings. What makes children obey their parents, what makes them decide to rebel themselves? There are always influences which we can control.

In the realm of relationships, people use "seduction techniques" to advertise their body and persuade others to have sex with them.

Free will means being able to choose between different options, and it does exist. But it is absolutely foolish to believe that nobody can distort the appeal of each option - or even mask it - in order to influence a persons' choice.
For instance, a loose woman with bad morals could act like a saint, participate in charities and dress conservatively in order to attract wealthy males... If a man who is attracted by altruistic women had to choose between her and an honest but non-advertising woman, obviously the man would go for the deceptive woman.

However, I don't think LOA's main function is to influence others - in principle.

Unlike marketing, seduction, advertising and brainwashing, I think LOA is about transforming oneself from the INSIDE in a way that someone will like you.
However, also I do not understand whether this necessarily means that the specific person you like will like you the way you are INSIDE.

[goosedown]

I agree that you can influence people's minds by using some seducing techniques.
But I think you have a chance to succeed if they haven't made up their minds on it yet.
If they have decided they want the opposite and apply LOA consciously or unconsciously, how will the universe react to two opposite thoughts?

[TeletubbieJellyPie]

I agree that you can influence people's minds by using some seducing techniques.
But I think you have a chance to succeed if they haven't made up their minds on it yet.
If they have decided they want the opposite and apply LOA consciously or unconsciously, how will the universe react to two opposite thoughts?

I would also like to know the answer and hope the LOA experts can provide us with some insight

However, I really do think (and hope) that LOA has nothing to do with seduction techniques, as they are truly manipulative and unfriendly. I used to apply the knowledge of "Pick up artists" and they did work very well in getting women into bed.
But that was all. Nothing to do with friendship or love.
I decided to abandon everything about seduction when I realized I want a lasting, eternal relationship, based on friendship and love.

[bweston]

There are so many common phrases out there such "like attracts like" and "opposites attract". In the case of the law of attraction, I've found that if you have the desire for a certain feeling i.e. trust, comfort, excitement, security, then you will attract more experiences, people, resources, etc. that match those feelings. If you imagine a great experience you had with a girl one night and use the law of attraction to attract more of that, you may get that girl again or you may get someone else. Either way, you will get the feeling you got from that experience.

So you are not manipulating any one person. You are bringing the person that matches your feelings/internal state.

[TeletubbieJellyPie]

So you are not manipulating any one person. You are bringing the person that matches your feelings/internal state.

My initial experience with LOA was that it helped me figure out HOW TO match the feelings and internal state of the person I wanted. It brought me closer, and closer, and closer... until I started negative thinking again 

[goosedown]

It's really hard to get rid of those negative feelings.
But since I learned LOA stuff (just about one week ago), I feel a lot better.
I was just jealous and desperate before, maybe somewhat manipulative.
As I become more forgiving and less desperate, I find it's easier to deal with the negative feelings. They come from the fear that we might lose something. I'm relaxed and less worried because I just wish the person I love all the best.

My initial experience with LOA was that it helped me figure out HOW TO match the feelings and internal state of the person I wanted. It brought me closer, and closer, and closer... until I started negative thinking again 
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[goosedown]

I also believe that LOA is a very positive thing. If I apply it in a correct way, is it possible to create love in a specific person's heart?
If the person is not a vibrational match, is LOA still helpful?
Why is that too often the attraction is one-sided?

There are so many common phrases out there such "like attracts like" and "opposites attract". In the case of the law of attraction, I've found that if you have the desire for a certain feeling i.e. trust, comfort, excitement, security, then you will attract more experiences, people, resources, etc. that match those feelings. If you imagine a great experience you had with a girl one night and use the law of attraction to attract more of that, you may get that girl again or you may get someone else. Either way, you will get the feeling you got from that experience.

So you are not manipulating any one person. You are bringing the person that matches your feelings/internal state.

[bweston]

RE: goosedown
LOA will give you the vibrational match to your intention. If you're intending a certain kind of relationship then LOA will give you exactly what you truly want!

You may consciously want a certain person but that person may not be a match for you. The only way I personally can tell whether a person is a match for me is if when I take action to pursue her, the experiences are enjoyable- albeit a little scary! I think this makes LOA extremely useful. You get the person you ARE a match for, not who you may think is.

RE: TeletubbieJellyPie
Yeah, getting rid of negative beliefs and feelings is 80% of the battle and the most difficult part. LOA will give you what you desire, if you are clear of negative and limiting beliefs. Here are my favorite resources:
1) EFT. This is one of the strangest but most effective techniques I have found. There's a free manual on it at emofree.com
2) Think of bad experiences that are holding you back. No "re-write" them in your head or on paper. Your brain can't tell the difference between what's real and what's not so give it a good memory. Take out all of the bad parts and re-write it to make it the best possible one.
3) Talk to a friend, especially one of the opposite sex, you trust about what you consider to be your character flaws that prevent you from attracting the kind of person you’ve always imagined. Saying it aloud and having someone contradict it goes a long way. To make the session even more effective, talk about your earliest memory in which this character flaw was an issue.

Other resources:
"The Work" by Byron Katie
The Lefkoe method. I think there is a free resource on it online
Re-evaluation co-counseling

The common thing amongst all these methods is knowing that YOU decide whether you want to keep those beliefs and feelings or not. The belief is just a thought you've reinforced to yourself over and over again. You can choose to release that belief. The resources I gave are meant to help you release the belief. If you want more help, please please feel free to message me. This is something I've spent a lot of time on and would love to be able to help you out with it.

[dawn]

All this is so confusing....
I've been trying to apply LOA for about a month now to get my ex fiance back...we've been going back and forth for 2 years...and I was very very positive, happy and confident and almost felt like we were really back together...until a couple of days ago he told a mutual friend (I guess so he could inform me) that he's getting engaged with another girl (from abroad!)....and I was just so confused how this could come about at the time when I've been applying LOA...
At the same time, every guy that has come into my life is no where near what I'm looking for....and each time I feel more inclined to apply LOA to my ex since he was every thing that I was looking for (his character etc)....Not sure what to do now...should i stop applying LOA to him? or should i keep my hopes up?

[bweston]

Hey Dawn,

Sorry to hear about your ex. What sort of things are you looking for in your relationship? What specific feelings and kind of experiences do you want to have? Use those as your starting point for LOA and visualization.

My personal advice would be to focus on visualizing the kind of experiences and feelings you want, as opposed to a specific person. Perhaps you will attract your ex back or perhaps you'll attract someone better! Either way, visualize your ideal and know that you can have it, because you will!

Feel free to pm me if you want more specific advice or help. I would love to be able to help.