Hi everyone. I thought i would give little updates on how i am doing with things.
People can search my story if they want a little background into my breakup but i will keep these posts focused on the present and the future as that is the only place i am looking now.
Its been 2 months today! Wow. Long time but it feels good in a way. She feels like a distant memory which tells me i am indeed over her now. I was scared of losing my feelings for her but i know when we feel attraction again, those feelings would return in time if I allowed them to.
My life right now is amazing, better than i can ever remember it being. I have a lot going on right now. Socially i am at the most desirable i have ever been. Surrounded by friends and lots of different people who keep tabs on what i do (Eg facebook).
I'm moving into my student house in 2 weeks which is exciting. Cant wait for that. I've started working out properly since im a health and fitness student i figured its about time i did!
As for my ex, well i think about her very infrequently now and when i do its quickly, i picture her face but dont really have an deep feeling of sorrow or anything.
My focus? Well the thing that has got me through the difficult period is indeed myself. I decided to learn from the mistakes and problems that occured towards the end instead of letting them disappear and hope they wouldnt return.
I want to create a better version of myself. Not necessarily for anyone but myself. I want to get rid of my bad habits and replace them with good ones. I have focused on becoming an alpha male, having alpha male traits.
It is possible i will see my ex in 3-4 weeks time for a party. I am using this short term goal to improve myself so much, she wont recognise me compared to the person i was when we split up. My old confidence, no neediness, self dependance and leadership like qualities will have all returned. My body will be fitter and healthy. My mind will be fitter and healthy. I will see her and i know i will be fine.
Sure i will be happy to see her but i dont need her in my life. Sure it would be nice to give things a go again but am i in a rush? Of course not. I know i will see her lots over the next 2 years because of how close our 2 houses are (in terms of friendship and distance) so why rush it! I want to allow her to see my changes ive made. And once ive seen her in a month's time, she gets a glimpse of things to come, i can push hard for the next month and a half to complete my journey.
I know, truthfully right now as i type this i can attract her back. Of course i can. I have alot going for me and am creating even more for myself right now. I am desired by women so if I make myself desirable for any women, I can get any women I desire. It wont matter if shes my ex. She is my ex to the old me, to the new me, she is an attractive person who I would like to get to know.
Like ive said before, this isnt about relighting our old flame anymore. I will have grown for a boy into a man when we reconnect properly in september. I will be able to choose what i want as i know she isnt my only option in life.
I will be able to decide whether she becomes a PART of my life again but i wont let her be my ENTIRE life again
Much love guys
Mike
March 11, 2010, 05:04:42 PM
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