he sort of insulted me

[fizza]

I was attracting this guy for past 4 months and yesterday he smiled at me, gave me a meaningful look. i was very happy yesterday and thought that he also like me a lot. but today he did a strange thing. he was with one my class mates(sort of enemy) and his other friends. they were pointing on me and laughing really hard. In short they were trying to make fun of my feelings.

i don't know what to do next? should stop attracting him or give him one more chance? i really like him but i know that nature can not be change. what should i do ? should i attract someone new in my life. i m really upset please guide me and tell what to do ? how should i react when he and his friends are near because he is in my college.

[Magdog, MD, Mr. Best Luck]

you can only answer that question, if you want him keep doing what you are doing, maybe he is afraid and acts this way. maybe he was not laughing at you. let if go for a few days and see how he acts. maybe he did not like what your enemies where saying. tip turn your enemies into you allies, ex: I am grateful that all my classmates love me and appreciate me, as I do them.


MD, Mr. Best Luck, Humble and Grateful

[Sitfab]

Fizza, I think you're judging things too quick and quite possibly out of context. Because ( at least for me ) I find it impossible to like a girl and make fun of her in a way that hurts her feelings. So quite possibly you're just assuming things that most definitely aren't true. Keep your spirit up.

[Josh]

It's true, don't be too quick on your judgment, besides you didn't hear what they were talking about. Give a few more days  .

[angel_star]

Hey Fizza, relax first. How do you know for sure that he was laughing at you? It could just be that they were laughing at some other joke which you mistook for laughing at you? But if you are sure that they were all making fun of you, do what Magdog has suggested. Start affirming that your college mates (including the guy you like) love you and admire you. If you meet any of his friends, act normal, be calm and confident. Change your self image because people will treat us exactly in the same way as we treat ourselves. God bless

[57angel]

Make yourself a confident and happy you, he will notice it and this will surely change how they feel towards you if what you suspect is true. Just focus on you, what matters now is how you love and accept yourself, they will just follow. Only you can answer that - should you stop attracting him. If he is, then continue what you are doing, without any feeling of fear and desperation

[fizza]

Thank you. i will play cool and see what happens next. should i imagine him being with me ? please tell me that can we change someones nature by law of attraction.please answer in detail thanks and sorry for wrong English :/

[Ginny]

can we change someones nature by law of attraction.please answer in detail thanks and sorry for wrong English :/

I don't think you can change someone's nature (and why would you want to? - it would mean that your personal relationships were with puppets, rather than real human beings) but I do think you can bring out different aspects of a person's character, depending on your own thoughts, expectations and behaviour.

You must know this about yourself - there are some people you will bend over backwards to help, and others you will not bother for. You are the same person in each instance, but your behaviour changes depending on the person you are interacting with. That's because some people will bring out one side of your character, and others a different side of your nature.

[Sitfab]

Actually, you can change somebody's behavior. People on the forum did it, I've done it to a small degree.

It's perfectly OK to do that, because in this case you bring out the best in them. I wanted my mom to be more positive, she became more positive.

As long as you love them/care for them and wish for a positive change in their behavior, it's anything but having interpersonal relationships with puppets.

In the end, aren't we all the puppet masters of our own universe?

[boomergirl]

It is all about you.  I think the people who bring out the so called "worst" in us are gifts.  Things that need to be seen in ourselves that we deny or can't see.  We have all the same qualities.  The good and the not so good...even though they're all good. 

Fizza, I'd give it a few days.  Don't jump to any conclusions.  I've been there, done that and due to past conditioning, my own fears and insecurities, I was wrong just about every time.  If you do conclude, make it positive conclusions.

[Detached&Allowing]

Fizza,

Love and respect yourself.  Whatever insecurities you have about YOU work on that.  You are a beautiful person who deserves only the best. 

To change someone's behavior just say to yourself how grateful you are for the desired behavior.  If you want him to say "hello" to you, then say " I am so grateful he said "hello" to me" Feel good when you say it.  It may take time, but if you say it with love and not out of desperation, his behavior will change.

Lots of love to you!!

[Ginny]

Actually, you can change somebody's behavior.

I didn't mean you can't change their behaviour - I've had a lot of success in changing people's behaviour. I meant you couldn't (or at least, I don't believe you can) change their nature. That is what fizza asked if you could change. Someone's nature is what I think of as Who They Really Are. And if I could change who someone is, what they are really like, then anyone could do the same to me, for better or worse. And then where is my free will in all that?

I do think you can change people's behaviour though (although I think of it in terms of bringing out different aspects of their behaviour). There is nothing shocking or unusual about this. I can even give an example that most people wouldn't even attribute to LOA (although others could definitely see LOA in it): I used to have a job where I had a micro-manager as a boss. She didn't trust me to do any of my tasks, and was coming to my desk every 5 seconds (well, that might be an exaggeration - but at least once an hour) to check up on me. She was a nice lady, but I got extremely demotivated, and became lazier and lazier in my job. She didn't trust me to do my job properly and so then I fulfilled her expectations by not doing my job properly. Eventually I got moved to another section and got another boss, and - I have no idea why - but the new boss always looked for the best in my work. Even though I thought I was doing an awful job by then, she always found something to commend me for, and little by little I started to have faith in myself again. And I started doing the great job that she praised me for. LOA at work again.

But in the above, I don't think of it as my basic nature changing. I've always been someone who will work hard for people who appreciate me. What changed was my behaviour, not who I am (what I would refer to as my nature).