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Topic: I am still in love with my ex gf who left me for another guy 6 months back, help (Read 8794 times)
My answers are in the bold. Please don't take it as if I'm being mean to you, but I really want you to be happy again and to also be the MAN not only she wants you to be but the MAN that you want to be for yourself so you can attract not only her, but many other things in life
I made the mistake of looking at my ex profile. And I feel like idiot again. I feel anger at my ex gf. Anger is something I hadn't felt at her all this while. It is not that she does not love me that makes me mad, it the fact that she dropped me like a used thing and treated me truly horribly.
Looking at an ex's profile is SO tempting, but of course you're only hurting yourself when you do that. Also, when you do that, you're still giving energy and thought that she's the primary focus on your life. What about you? You're mad b/c she doesn't love you, but what if she did love you but wasn't happy with you? That would also make you mad. Change your focus of happiness from her to something you REALLY enjoy doing. As hard as it may sound, it's the stepping stone to getting in the right direction.
She didn't just leave me, she told reasons which completely destroyed me and my confidence, made me a wreck, I went from cool fun guy to super loser extremely fast. She told me among many things one reason for leaving - "if I can find better guys why should I stay with you".
You need to be that cool, fun guy again. She gave you reasons - which could very well be excuses. Don't even for a second put anymore thought into those "reasons". Regain yourself, tell yourself she LOVES you b/c you are BETTER than any guy in the world and THAT'S why she should stay with you, besides also being happier with you.
To be plain she was very bitchy. I can't believe I am using this word for her. I think what pisses me most is that she did not even respond to my birthday wish. And she broke up with me near my birthday 6 months back. I was crying on my birthday all day. I did not even eat on my birthday. Most terrible birthday of my life.
Trust me, I've attracted my ex numerous times and I called him an a$$hole, cruel, etc. for hurting me. He even hurt me my past birthday back in July. He stated he'd see me and never did. There was another girl that he made time for, but I never got that time. I'm telling you this b/c I know EXACTLY how hurt you are. You are SPECIAL as hell, even if I don't know you personally. She will regret it and trust me, add it in to the things she's gonna make up to you, even though you can't get that specific date back, you will feel like a King when she earns your trust again, and she will!
Right now I am feeling like calling her and telling her off. Someone wish I don't do that.
How can one person go from being so nice to so horrible? I was never never bad with her? Is just falling out of love justification for treating your ex horribly? I have tried to believe that goodness remains inside my ex but why does she behave so horribly with me? She is nice with others. What did I do wrong? In the 3.5 years we were together I was never bad with her. Never. I was always honest, hid nothing from her, my weakness my most embarassing secrets. She also told me hers. Her family troubles, everything.
Stop blaming yourself, b/c it's nothing you did. I swear this is like the reverse-role of what happened to me, except you two dated much longer than we did. Anyways, it's what I call the GIGS syndrome (Grass Is Greener). She thinks she can find better but trust me, that guy she think is actually better, is actually worse for her. This is a lesson that she needs to learn to appreciate what she already had. She's being selfish, but I PROMISE you she'll come back saying sorry, etc. Us girls ALWAYS tend to have a tendency to have nostalgia & go back to the past...and she'll be one of them coming back to you .
What did I do to attract all this from her in my life? I was working and enjoying my life. I was in love. Though the place I worked in, I was the only guy and rest were all beautiful females. I used to worry at times what if I turn out to be a jerk and just leave my gf(ex) because I fall in love or just plain do something stupid in office? Did this attract my ex leaving me?
I wouldn't say that was the main thing that attracted her to leave you, but what if she thought that you were gonna leave her for some beautiful girl at your office? You see how both of those thoughts would mesh and come to a total disaster. At the same time, you shouldn't have even had those thoughts, especially when you're in love. Take this as a lesson and make sure that WHEN you get her back to NEVER think like that again! It's really negative unless you really do like one of those girls at your workplace!
I never even dreamed she would do this to me. She used to be a bit insecure when she was hear of a few of my close childhood female friends and few stunners in our college. But I always told her that she was the one for me and come what may I would never betray her. But I never asked her for any affirmation of whether she would leave me or not. I trusted her so much.
What did I think wrong to attract this? I really need to know. Was it my slight fear of doing what my ex gf did that maybe caused it?
What you did wrong was think negative. Simple as that. You need to right now stop thinking negative, get yourself together, even do a little makeover if you want to. You need to feel HOTT, SEXY, GORGEOUS. You want her to want, need, and miss you at the same time. Read up on some Confucius quotes and Buddha quotes if you have to. I promise she'll come back to you, but you have to put yourself as NUMBER ONE.
« Last Edit: November 15, 2011, 02:33:24 AM by CityGirlLuv »
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