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Author Topic: How to deal with people who pull us down  (Read 510 times)

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Offline Shrikanya

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How to deal with people who pull us down
« on: October 02, 2011, 11:52:19 PM »
Hi All,

I am sure everybody has faced the issue. I have seen that often, the people who are supposed to be supportive of our enthusiasm for life and positive attitude, turn against us and try to convince us that we have lots of limitations. Often these are people older to us like our parents, relatives, etc.

When you try to convince them of law of attraction, they try to pull you down saying that they have lots of experience in this world. Sometimes, these are the senior colleagues at our workplaces.

Recently, I have been feeling down. How do you deal with these situations?

I have tried to go to some other place when these people are around. But it seems as if the devil has changed its body. Similar people follow me around, wherever I go. Have any ideas?

Thanks for the suggestion in advance!!

Best Regards,
Shrikanya

Offline Ginny

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Re: How to deal with people who pull us down
« Reply #1 on: October 03, 2011, 02:15:55 AM »
I never talk to anyone about LOA outside of this forum, as I don't want to have to deal with the skepticism.

Generally I don't talk to people about things that I am enthusiastic about, unless I know that they will be enthusiastic too. It is too annoying having others rain on your parade, and why do they (naysayers) need to know anyway?

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Offline Vicki Christina

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Re: How to deal with people who pull us down
« Reply #2 on: October 03, 2011, 06:07:09 AM »
I talk to few people outside this LOA site about my beliefs on this topic, or what I am visualizing.   No use in discussing these issuse and desires with people who will try to tell you to "give up" instead of "let go"!!!! 

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Offline 57angel

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Re: How to deal with people who pull us down
« Reply #3 on: October 03, 2011, 11:35:25 AM »
I shared LOA to few people whom I know they need LOA to change their circumstances in life, and I am so very grateful that with few months of using it,they have seen turn arounds in their lives. I shared LOA to my once a friend,but now only an officemate but only received negative reactions and I realized that LOA will come to the lives of the people who need them. So, now I am choosy to whom will I share it with! I am also grateful that my officemate is no longer a close friend (just officemate, but I am so sure that I have forgiven her already many months ago for everything that has been said and done), for she is indeed a very negative person, someone who always have something bad to say in a person. Aside from what had happened between us, I also realized that keeping in touch with negative people will not help and inspire me to get where I want to be, but rather to go backwards all the more. Limiting the time of interaction, if not completely not spending time with those negative people is better, we will not let them snatch us of those positive beliefs that will in turn can only prevent us from getting us to where we want to be. It is our way of loving ourselves, more!

Offline Katie

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Re: How to deal with people who pull us down
« Reply #4 on: October 03, 2011, 01:45:03 PM »
I dealt with nothing but negative people when I was attracting Patrick back. "I've known Patrick since he was 18, he'll never change his mind, just forget about him".. (his best friend) "you know how proud he is, he'll never come back to you, once he makes up his mind, you can't do anything about it" (another friend) and my daughter "Mom, you're crazy, you're losing your mind... face the facts, you'll never get him back". so I just kept everything to myself and that's why I spent so much time on this forum - the only place where I felt good.

Offline Shrikanya

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Re: How to deal with people who pull us down
« Reply #5 on: October 04, 2011, 12:09:42 AM »
Hi,

Thanks Ginny, Vicki Christina, 57angel, Katie. Great to have your views on this.

Initially I felt that who was I to judge anybody as negative or positive? I thought may be something is wrong with me. Now i know that I am not alone :)

I generally do not tell people about LOA unless asked for. But it becomes necessary when they are the people you live with(eg parents, sisters, etc) and you love them. If they keep on attracting negative things in life, it causes distress. For example, if you always think that you are going to have to struggle a lot with something, the struggle comes to you naturally. But what about the person who wants those things effortlessly? Since that person is in the same household, that person is going to get affected.

When I was a kid, I was taught to be in a good company. It was said that if you stay in proximity with good people, you are bound to evolve in a positive way. On the other hand, if you stay in proximity with negative people, you are bound to get affected in a negative way.

As far as people in office are concerned, they talk about recession, problems, compromises,etc. Worst part. Constant bitching and backbiting. Difficult situation :)

Well, let me rephrase my question. How do you keep yourself positive when you are surrounded by people who drain your energy? Can you all please share some instances when you have dealt with similar situation? How did you overcome your personal demon?

Thanks a lot. Thanks for sharing your views. :)

Best Regards,
Shrikanya

Offline ToMeAndOnlyMe

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Re: How to deal with people who pull us down
« Reply #6 on: October 04, 2011, 01:39:00 AM »
Hi,

Thanks Ginny, Vicki Christina, 57angel, Katie. Great to have your views on this.

Initially I felt that who was I to judge anybody as negative or positive? I thought may be something is wrong with me. Now i know that I am not alone :)

I generally do not tell people about LOA unless asked for. But it becomes necessary when they are the people you live with(eg parents, sisters, etc) and you love them. If they keep on attracting negative things in life, it causes distress. For example, if you always think that you are going to have to struggle a lot with something, the struggle comes to you naturally. But what about the person who wants those things effortlessly? Since that person is in the same household, that person is going to get affected.

When I was a kid, I was taught to be in a good company. It was said that if you stay in proximity with good people, you are bound to evolve in a positive way. On the other hand, if you stay in proximity with negative people, you are bound to get affected in a negative way.

As far as people in office are concerned, they talk about recession, problems, compromises,etc. Worst part. Constant bitching and backbiting. Difficult situation :)

Well, let me rephrase my question. How do you keep yourself positive when you are surrounded by people who drain your energy? Can you all please share some instances when you have dealt with similar situation? How did you overcome your personal demon?

Thanks a lot. Thanks for sharing your views. :)

Best Regards,
Shrikanya

Show more love :P, just constantly be a happy person and you only let them suck your energy if you open up to it.

Positive people can be lightning rods, I say this from personal experience. Continue being happy, don't let them drain you.

Laugh, brush it off your shoulder, respect their opinions even if they don't respect yours.

At some point, they'll either like being around you cause you're always happy or they continue to wallow in their own issues.

People in the office aren't really an issue, they're their own issue. The primary "issue" at work for you is being a great worker :)

When I was without a job, one of my friends flipped out at me asking me why I wasn't worried about not having a job.
I told them that I wasn't willing to waste energy on freaking out about not having a job cause it would do no good for me in the long run.
Recently got hired at a great company with great pay, no complaints!

When I worked at a job with several negative people at a retail store, they complained about everything you could imagine.
I didn't complain, did my work, kicked butt and I got all of their hours in the process :). (Very devilish, but I deserved it :))
"WAAAAAAAAAAAH WHY DO YOU GET MORE HOURS" (My efforts at this job actually put me at more hours than some of the managers)
"I work harder and customers like being around me."
"Well, you're just better at talking to people."

Meh, what? I wasn't necessarily better, I just understood it was my job to deal with people, even the negative ones.

I know my example might be somewhat juvenile, but it's kind of how some people are.
It's so much easier to complain about the world, the faults that this world has and everyone else because looking at yourself can be hard sometimes.

Just continue to be happy at the workplace in the midst of those dark clouds, you'll be that ray of sunshine.
Not only will it possibly get people to turn around, but it'll provide you with more opportunity in the future.

Keep in mind that sometimes a person who continues to go on and on about negative stuff without looking for a solution is someone who has no one in their life who listens.
You can't help people who don't want to be helped.

This new format is bugging me...I can't see what I'm typing, sorry if my entry looks funny.

Offline Mariposa, (KnJ)

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Re: How to deal with people who pull us down
« Reply #7 on: October 04, 2011, 03:27:38 AM »
There is a Toggle button above the post (in the reply page) looks like this [little blue arrow] hit that and it will fix you being able to see what you are typing!   ;D

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Offline 2thetop

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Re: How to deal with people who pull us down
« Reply #8 on: October 04, 2011, 05:12:41 AM »
i like to just remember that it is their beliefs and their thoughts that make them feel that way.  everyone knows loa they just dont know they know it.  i do like pretty much everyone else.  i dont talk about it much.  i do look for openings to talk about it though lol.  mostly cuz i like to hear peoples opinions on subjects.  i dont speak to anyone about using it to attract my girl back.  however that might change once i do it lol.

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Offline Shrikanya

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Re: How to deal with people who pull us down
« Reply #9 on: October 04, 2011, 10:52:05 PM »
Hi All,

Let me first thank you for all for your posts for all the generous replies. One thing to be remembered: Let everybody speak of their beliefs, you take what you care for. Filter out the rest. :)

@ToMeAndOnlyMe:  Thanks a lot. Being really happy helps a lot.  :) It wards off negative people. They dismiss us thinking that some thing is wrong with us and leave.Your experience has helped me a lot. In fact, I have conquered some inner demons by always keeping positive.

I found another way. Change the subject of discussion when people turn to backbiting or bitching or taking negative things. I have observed that people have a strong desire to give opinions just to show their knowledge of the subject. But when the topic of discussion is positive, who says what  does not matter :)

Thanks to all who helped me find a way out of my current dilemma!!

Best Regards,
Shrikanya
« Last Edit: October 08, 2011, 12:05:52 AM by Shrikanya »

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