Getting an EX back

[youngblueyes12]

I'm a little confused here. I've seen a lot of people post on using the LOA to get their ex back. They name all the awful things the person did, yet they're willing to put their precious time and energy into bringing them back into their lives. How is this using the LOA to bring happiness and abundance??? I would much rather use the LOA to bring someone into my life who wants to be there, who will love me for me, and who posseses all the attributes I seek in a partner. I don't know if this is just me ranting but it just seems pointless and even detrimental to will someone into your life who has no desire to be there.
I'm not judging anyone. We've all been there where we really want our exs back, but I think for us to be truly happy we should leave it up to the universe to bring us the right partner.

[Magdog, MD, Mr. Best Luck]

We are all entitled to our opinion, and remember we manifest the way people treat us, therefore, behavior can be different the second time around. Good luck to you in your path.

[Vicki Christina]

We are often experiencing growth in this process because we are learning to understand how we played a part of the relationship problems. 

[Sweet Spirit]

Young blue eyes,

When my boyfriend left me back in August I was very hurt and naturally I bashed him and brought up all his negative points to make myself feel better (because I thought that by bashing him it would make me feel like I was better off without him.) In all actuality I was still missing him, still wanting him and still desperate to have him in my life to make me happy. I was miserable when He was living with me last summer because he was acting like a jerk, but I also knew in my gut that he was my true love. It was the way I perceived him that made him that way. People say you can not change a person and to accept them for the way they are. That is only half true. You can change your perception of that person. You can visualize them being sweet and kind and affirm that they are sweet and kind. I knew my boyfriend could be sweet and kind but my perception of him (being a jerk,) was bringing out the worst in him. It was when I started loving him unconditionally and saying he was sweet and kind while not expecting anything, (letting go,)  guess what happened? He DID change! He is more loving and we get along so much better. I stopped being clingy and he started being more affectionate.

Well we are back to living together and this time I love EVERYTHING about him. I am not miserable like I was when we were together last summer. It is because I changed my perception of him that he is no longer acting like a jerk. My ex wanted to be with me and I knew in my gut instinct that he loved me. He said while we were apart with no contact for over a month, he still loved me but was giving me time to grow. He knew I was hurting and he was hurt too. So its not true that we are always trying to attract someone who does not want us.

So when people want their ex back even though their ex may have hurt them, it was not always the ex that meant to hurt them. It was their perception and negativity about their ex that caused their ex to be hurtful. We allow ourselves to be hurt. We build our exes up and put them on this pedestal and when they break a promise or don't do things we expect, we feel that they are jerks that hurt us. We are the ones who hurt ourselves.

On the other hand, there are those cases when an ex really did treat their mate bad. The mate did nothing wrong and took the beating and still loved their ex. The mate never said anything negative about their ex but still the ex crapped all over the mate, took advantage of them and dumped them like yesterday's garbage. Those are the exes no one should ever want to attract back and they should be thanking their exes for dumping them; otherwise they would still be in an abusive situation. Those are the ones who should get over an ex and move on to someone who will treat them better.

I think most the people on here have not been abused by an ex. If they did, they are glad its over and done with. So when those of us bash our exes and still want them back, its because we love them and know that they did not mean to hurt us; we are just hurt because they broke up with us that's all. There is nothing wrong with trying to attract an ex back if there was a true connection between the two people. My ex and I had a true connection and that is why he felt he had to return to me.

[LOA Believer]

Thanks for all of the info and Sweet Spirit, your post really hit a chord with me and I understand even more now. . . Thank you so much

J

[Magdog, MD, Mr. Best Luck]

If you give someone love without expecting anything back you never get hurt. That is a powerful statement.


Magdog, MD, Mr. Best Luck, Humbly and Gratefully