Help!

[Detached&Allowing]

very good.  let me know how you feel in a few days/week or so.  Did you read about Ho'oponopono?  I also found the following:  http://www.sgi.org/buddhism/sgis-buddhist-practice/nam-myoho-renge-kyo.html

Not sure how or if it works but will let you know. Maybe we can both practice it and see.    

Also, I am going to recommend that you forgive her in your heart for her reactions to you.  Don't tell her you forgive her but say to yourself over and over.. "I forgive you, I forgive you for...."  You may also want to consider forgiving yourself in your heart.  Forgive yourself for "reacting" to the situation the way you did.  As humans we have a tendency to relive our mistakes.  Please forgive yourself and you can continue to move forward.

Lots of love and the very best of LOA to you!

[JustForToday]

kirua---

you got great help and advice here
reading your story, i would suggest though, not to put too much effort in visualizing and all the stuff. lay it beside for now, really JUST care about yourself and be happy.

sometimes, its better to just give it to the universe instead of putting much effort to get it manifested. your wish has been sent. if it helps you to stay happy, visualize your happiness with her, but watch yourself not being or getting attached to the outcome, since you have been very needy and desperate before.

less is more sometimes and i wish you the best of love

[kirua0212]

Hi all... Thank you for the wonderful replies you all gave... I'm garateful... So yeah.. Its been 23 days since she last contacted me... Should I give up? She hasnt been texting or calling me... Lifes great for me though, i got myself an iphone, my family business is a success, im grateful... Bt there are sometimes where i would break down and cry and strt to say things like i need you i love u come back dont go and stuff like that.. I know its not good... Should i give up or still be strong? Im still believing that she will come...

[traceymar]

hey kirua!
its been 10 days since we last talked...and am wondering the same thing...should i give up? he never initiates contact, am always the one to call or txt him.... the only time he txtd first was valentines day! sometimes i feel good, i laugh a lot, i go out but others, like now, i break down and feel so hurt and used...i believe he will come back too, i even feel we ll spend these easter holidays together. He lives in another country so yesterday i bought the presents i ll take for his family as i always do when i visit...might sound paranoid but something inside me tells me i will give these presents to them!
I know am not really helping you since am in the same position as you but i just wanted to send you positive vibes! lets stay strong and trust that the universe will do what has to be done!
all the best!

[kirua0212]

Thank you traceymar!  im wondering... should i wish her on our anniversary 23 march ? or would that make her think that im a freak? and also ive dreaming about her so much lately.... in all of my dreams, we are really happy together and i can really feel the love.... is this a sign that she is also thinking about me and wants to be back with me? but my problem is, im scared if i initiated contact, she will be not attracted to me..... help... really... 

[belive88]

 hi kirua0212 may i advise you to read a link schenderson22 posted in that topic 'have gone a while but need positive thoughts' in the relationship section! I cant post the link as im replying from my phone. but i highly reccommend you read it i feel great after reading and we can have ANYTHING we desire

[JustForToday]

to those who are asking theirsels you to give up....

no way, it takes some on time.... 

i just mean you have to step back a time, when you do that and still be sure about the positive outcome, it will happen---- sometimes patience is needed though.

keep on going the dircetion!!!! THE DAYS WITH NO CONTACT IS NOTHING 

[Detached&Allowing]

I would not recommend you wish her her a happy anniversary since you two are not together.  You are looking for a reason to contact her.   Read the following, it may help you to understand a bit better how this whole thing works.

http://iasos.com/metaphys/bashar/


It sounds like every other aspect of your life is going well.  Focus on that and be grateful for it!

Lots of love and the very best of LOA to you!

Thank you traceymar!  im wondering... should i wish her on our anniversary 23 march ? or would that make her think that im a freak? and also ive dreaming about her so much lately.... in all of my dreams, we are really happy together and i can really feel the love.... is this a sign that she is also thinking about me and wants to be back with me? but my problem is, im scared if i initiated contact, she will be not attracted to me..... help... really... 

[kirua0212]

Thank you guys for the great replies... Cant tell you enough how much you guys helped me to move on... I'm really grateful... thanks to schenderson22, crazysoul, def, traceymar and everyone else who contributed... your inputs are very helpful and thoughtful, i'm grateful i found this forum... I'll stay strong and believe she will come... She is happy with me NOW. she loves me dearly NOW. We have a great relationship NOW!!!!!!!! 

[traceymar]

 I agree with schenderson kirua, don't wish her...i can understand that you are tempted to do it and  that you miss her dearly but it will probably won't get you anywhere... i repeatedly fell in the trap of thinking that if i wrote or said exactly what i felt to him it would change things but nothing happened, i guess am just reassuring him that am here waiting so he can take his time without worrying...am now trying to keep my distance...and just keep my faith that i will finally attract him back...am praying, visualizing, writing, anything that can keep me strong and positive...its not always easy but everytime i feel desperate i tell myself that i love him too much to mess things up now that am so close...i know we belong together!
i love your affirmations! the best of luck to you! SHE LOVES YOU and YOU HAVE A GREAT RELATIONSHIP NOW!!!!!!

[57angel]

... should i wish her on our anniversary 23 march ? or would that make her think that im a freak? and also ive dreaming about her so much lately.... in all of my dreams, we are really happy together and i can really feel the love.... is this a sign that she is also thinking about me and wants to be back with me? but my problem is, im scared if i initiated contact, she will be not attracted to me..... help... really... 

Kirua, there is perfect and right time for everything. I personally think that it is not best for you to wish her in your anniversary. Instead, focus on making yourself a better, happier you! Keep letting go of negative feelings and beliefs associated in your relationship with her, you can use meditations, affirmations, EFT, Sedona Method, among others to do this. Don't initiate contact when you are not in the feeling that even if she will ignore you, it will not affect you in any way. When you are NOT in the state that you are no longer scared to initiate contact, that you no longer have the thoughts and beliefs in you that she is not attracted to you and you are not worthy of her attention, then I suggest, never ever initiate contact with her. Take her out from your pedestal first, and put yourself in your pedestal by showing much love to yourself

[kirua0212]

Thank you guys! I really appreciate your guys help! But I want to ask one thing.... I had a fight with my boss at workplace earlier this morning... Then i felt so crushed and devastated that I broke down and cry cause i feel guilty, (my mom is the boss) i usually talk to my ex when something like this happened... I lost control then i text-ed her "can i call you?" she did not replly then i text-ed her "please for a while", the i text-ed that why should she care cause im not even a friend and my matter is insignificant for her and apologized for disturbing her, i text-ed her at 1221... then i went out for a meeting with a client and went to exercise and feel completely better and happy and i made up with my mom (boss)... then when i got back home, around 0030, (i left my phone, cause i have two numbers and the number i text-ed her with is personal number so i did not bring it to work) then i checked my phone and got a text from her saying "sorry, cant talk right now... what happened?" she text-ed me at 1330, which, i already went out. and i found out after 11 hours. but that is the only text i got. should i reply or not reply? thank you for your opinions....

Love and Happy thoughts to you all!!!!   

[JustForToday]

kirua.....

i know how hard it is, but you have to stay to no contact.... you asked me something before and i can just say- let her and leave her for now!!!
concentrate on yourself, the more you are after her, the more she will get distant to you.
even when you face problems and this would be the time to talk someone beloved, you have to excluse her for now. i am alone too and i have to deal with all alone. but i come here or talk to other people. dont chase her!! YOU CAN TALK TO US AND GET HELP HERE, but first and most important, no one can make you happy, only YOU can do it.
find the happiness in you, that is soooo important.
you seem to be really after her and i do understand that and we all do, but this way is not working when you want her back into your life.

go on, move on, find a state where you can be happy with your life just now as it is at the moment.
start writing down things for which you can be grateful for, each day- be grateful for what you have NOW in order to get more things to be grateful for.

let go please, dont contact her at all. you are needy kirua, please see that and read all of the detachment posts on here again, suck them into you until it makeS CLICK!!!!

I WISH YOU LOVE AND PATIENCE; WE ARE ALWAYS HERE

[Detached&Allowing]

Thank you guys! I really appreciate your guys help! But I want to ask one thing.... I had a fight with my boss at workplace earlier this morning... Then i felt so crushed and devastated that I broke down and cry cause i feel guilty, (my mom is the boss) i usually talk to my ex when something like this happened... I lost control then i text-ed her "can i call you?" she did not replly then i text-ed her "please for a while", the i text-ed that why should she care cause im not even a friend and my matter is insignificant for her and apologized for disturbing her, i text-ed her at 1221... then i went out for a meeting with a client and went to exercise and feel completely better and happy and i made up with my mom (boss)... then when i got back home, around 0030, (i left my phone, cause i have two numbers and the number i text-ed her with is personal number so i did not bring it to work) then i checked my phone and got a text from her saying "sorry, cant talk right now... what happened?" she text-ed me at 1330, which, i already went out. and i found out after 11 hours. but that is the only text i got. should i reply or not reply? thank you for your opinions....  Yes, you can reply... reply with a "thank you for responding and apologize for contacting her.  Everything worked out.  Keep in mind when you "react" to situations it can cause more grief.  If you can resist that urge to "react" things have a way of working themselves out.  Just like they did by the early afternoon.  I am going to say that is the lesson to be learned from today's experience.  And this advice goes for everyone in this forum.  Always remember to refrain from "reacting".  I rarely results in anything good. 

Love and Happy thoughts to you all!!!!