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Author Topic: HELP! How to make my immature boyfriend understands me and mature using LoA???  (Read 3609 times)

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Offline bubblylin

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Here's my story...

First of all, I'm an Asian... my boyfriend is a westerner. I can keep up with his cultures except one, sex! No, I can't keep up with that. and I have commitment that I will not have sex before marriage. He doesn't ask me for sex.. just want to see me naked... but once I showed him...he asks for more (not sex) but whole body naked... i feel I can't believe him... once I let my guard down...he asks for more...so nobody can guarantee he will not do anything to me when we're alone. :'(
I tried to explain to him... but he doesn't listen and keep arguing and just keep asking what he wants... and when I ignores him.. he pissed off and doesn't want to talk to me and says that I don't love him like he loves me. he's immature... he sulks and doesn't talk to me for days just because of it. he's older than me... i think he's the one who supposed to be understanding
What do i do now?
and with LoA how can I make him understand..please...HELP!!

Offline bubblylin

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anyone....help...please........

Offline Andrew Wilkie

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OK,

You can't make anybody understand or accept the Law of Attraction. 

You cannot force LOA etc. onto anybody. No matter how good you think it is.  How would you feel if you as the bread winner, head of the family was being told you've got it all wrong. Most people slam on the breaks, get all defensive etc.

I've found it really useful to tie it into something that the person will understand. I was asked why was I working so hard. I never could come up with an answer that satisfies them. Then it just popped into my head.

What is something that they complain about? - money is normally a good one. What is there job or something that they like doing? For me the person was all about private education and school.

I said I'm doing all of this for school fees. Never been queried since.  They know private education costs money.

Remember these are your emotional responses to his behaviour. When you change (no that doesn't mean you have to have sex with him!) he will also change.

Westerners and Asians have very different views on bodies, being naked and the 'self image'.  I  know this very well.  If he's isn't willing to accept your point of view, then do you want to be with him?  If he doesn't accept one of your very important values, I'd personally really question the relationship. If you have to subjugate and give in on this, then what?

If you want to use LOA, what is your end result that you want. That is what you need to focus on. Also, I'd clear up your own emotions to his behaviour.

Offline bubblylin

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Hi Andrew, thanks for your answer.

I think I understand a little, what I need now is to focus to change my behavior so he will also change his?

I know what you said about this relationship is quite right.. I mean if I had to throw away my values just to satisfy him, then I'm so stupid and the most possible way out of this problem I think is break-up..  I know.. but that's kinda hard when I still love him... :'(

Any suggestions?

Offline Iron Ur

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trying to think...

first. Breaking up doesn't solve your problem. it never does, because how do you know the next guy will not be the same..

Something to understand about people and relationships is this. the one who needs the relationship the least is the one who controls it. and People only want what they can't have.

in other words.

He is in control because, you are going againest herself to please him. Also he wants sex and you are not giving it to him, he wants what he is not getting.

I want you to list 10 strong qualities about yourself, and I do mean strong. qualities he doesn't have. like matureity for example.

1.take about 10 to 30 mins a day to focus on your breathing, if any thoughts occur in your head just let them come and go don't get caught up in them. if you do just bring your attention back to your breathing. This is a mindfullness meditation it will calm you down and allow you to see things more clearly to make better choices.

2. also whenever you have a good quiet 30 mins to a hour. Meditate on a strong quality you have and he does not have. Like maturity for example. Meditate on how you personally define matureity. 

Holding thoughts of strong qualities in your mind, that are stronger then he is. you will begin to have an Aura of strength. in time he will feel that you are stronger and more mature.

3. after, and I do mean AFTER you have  calmmer mind from the mindfullness miditation, hold in your mind a image of you and him doing a enjoyable activity together. something romantic like sitting on the poarch watching a sunset.

DO NOT think about him not asking to see you naked, if you do youOuter Mind, aka ego, will clash with his and he will just keep doing it. just think about doing romantic things with him that do not revolve around what you do not want.

If you are having any trouble not thinking about this problem, just like with the mindfullness minditation, just keep bringing your thoughts back to the non sexual romantic events. it will get easier each time.

4. with strong feeling, and a clear mind, make a wish, so to speak, say something like "I am strong. I understand my boyfriend is still young and is fasinated by the female body, I know in time he will grow out of it.  I desire my boyfreind to be mature and decent and show respect to my desicions. I know what i wish for will be granted . I am greatful that he as good health"

Something liek that, or put your own spin on it, let it come from deep down from your heart.

Let me know how it goes

Offline bubblylin

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Hi Iron Ur..

Thanks for your reply and support. I'm trying it now :)

Yes, you were right about thinking sexual thoughts will only make him desire it for more. I was trying not to think about it last night, and it kinda worked...not fully but I'm sure slowly it will.

Thanks a lot. I will let you know the progress ;)

Offline bubblylin

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Hey... suddenly it came into my mind.. .what if he also doing the same thing towards me... using the LoA towards me to manipulate me or force me to do anything I don't wanna do??

How to win over him?

Offline Sneha Kulkarni

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hi
i would say we are not here to control some ones mind.. loa can be used to get power into us.. changed your approach towards him and you will see the change in him automatically

sneha

Offline bubblylin

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Hi Sneha,

Would you please advise me what kind of approach i should apply to him?

Offline lovely

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Hi bubblylin,

          I want to share something wid u..when it comes to relationship,dnt try to control anyone..think abt d moments u wnt to hav wid ur boyfriend...visualize him enjoying wid u..feel as if he wants to be wid u tht way..believe tht he is behaving tht way wid u nt only bcoz u want him to behave tht way,bt bcoz he himself is enjoying it....

          In tht way u r nt controllng anyone,still he will behave the way u want....ths is a trick :P
           It works n i hope it wil wrk 4 u too :)


                                  wid lots n lots of love
                                                                      lovely
           

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