getting an ex back, though long distance...

[seb913]

hi, well this is the first time I'm ever done something like this (putting up a post),
but I've reached the point where I really want help, and I hear a lot about how the Law of Attraction can help with bringing your ex back to you, so I'm trying this out.

so last july, my boyfriend had to move away to the other side of the country, so we started a long distance relationship.
understand our relationship before he moved was 98% perfect. we were in completely in love with each other and had mostly everything needed to have a long distance relationship work (i.e. motivation).

after he moved away, the first three months of our long distance relationship was going almost very smoothly. but then, being the paranoid and insecure person I am, started thinking "negative thoughts". I starting getting worried that he was losing interest in me, scared that he was going to find someone else better, and scared that I might've been losing him, etc.
and sometimes my thoughts made me do things I wouldn't normally do (I stopped saying "I love you" back and kinda started doubting his feelings for me).

then in late november, we got into an argument and we broke up. he said "I love you, but I just don't see how this is going to work, because we may never see each other again. so I think this is best.".
then a couple days later, i made the stupid mistake of emailing him and asking to talk. I told him that I didn't want this relationship to end because of him thinking we might never see each other again, and that I wanted to try anyway because I really loved him.
then he called me and we basically "argued" for two hours with him saying "I don't see how it's going to work; I think I still love you, but my feelings kind of changed". but at the end of the conversation, he finally agreed to try again, then we hung up. but he called back a few seconds later and said "I still love you.".

despite getting him back, I still couldn't escape the negative thoughts, and got very depressed over it because he wasn't calling me, I had to call him and I felt like I was FORCING him to talk to me. so I continued thinking negative thoughts.
then after a month of dating again, we broke up for the last time. he said things like "I still love you, but my feelings have changed. my feelings started to change when you stopped saying "I love you" and you started doubting our relationship; I felt like you didn't care anymore.". and he also said "I still care about you, and don't think I'm coming out of this relationship unscathed; it still hurts. I just don't see how it's going to work."

so that's a "brief" description of what happened.

basically, from what I understand of the LOA, I brought the ending of a happy relationship myself by thinking negative thoughts and focusing on them rather than thinking positively. and now I want to reverse this, because I really do feel like me and him are perfect for each other and that we can make this relationship work. despite his feelings changing, I'm pretty sure he still cares deeply about me, but has just given up on working on it.

can someone please help me try to get him back?
I know that I have to stop thinking negative thoughts and I've heard that I have to visualize being back together with him,
but I need more details on how to do that.
it's a tad harder because it's long distance, and I'm kinda worried that he can let go of easier because of it.
it's been two months since we've talked. what should I do???

some advice would be greatly appreciated. =]

[David V.]

What I think is....that distance is relative.

Would you rather have him here and have your relationship crumble?

Or..

Would you want to become living PROOF that distance matters not, as long as there is true, genuine, unadulterated love?

[Calidris]

You're relationship is almost completely like mine.  My ex broke up with my in november after an arguement.  Well we had an agruement about our future and over somethings that he was doing that disappointed me and got me questioning about our relationship. My negative for months had been leading up to this blow up.  We were long distance too and my ex was always the positive one about being patient and things working work, if we just wait for them to happen.  Well after the agruement he didn't speak to me for about two weeks and then we he finally spoke to me it was how the agruement brought him back to zero trust of me for him, that he could never make me happy, that my expectations were too high for him and he could never live up to them.  He tried for about a week but I could tell that there was a spark gone out of him that with that agrument things had changed. 

I knew screwed up and apologized over and over again.  Well I had been planning to visit him one of the reasons was to work this out.   But then a week after the agruement he stated that he just didn't see things working out between us, that he no longer pictured that he would ever ask me to marry him and that he still loved me and breaking up wasn't because there was lack of love.  That it wasn't fair to either of us to keep the relationship going when we didn't get to see each other a lot.  I broke down mostly because I knew that if we ever broke up that he would cut all communication with me.  He said that he couldn't talk to me because it would be too hard to get over me. 

I tried to email a couple of times, called once but I didn't get  a response.  So then I went to visit him mostly to lay things out on the table but also becase I needed some closure because the break up took me by surprise.  Face to face he still said thae same things that he loved me, coudn't deal with the long distance anymore, would always care for me but just didn't see it working out even if the distance was taken away.  We haven't spoken since then which was almost two mnths ago. 

I am working on being positive.  I know that he will never forget me, I know that I will never forget him, I am just staying positive that one day he will be ready to at least start a friendship and I look forward to that day. 

[Calidris]

http://www.powerlawofattraction.com/forum/law-of-attraction-for-relationship/bible-of-getting-your-ex-back-dns-post/

This might be a beneficial post.  He said that he even attracted back exes that said they never wanted to see him again. 

So, my only advice and this is what I am focusing on now because we both realize that it was our negative thoughts and fear that caused us to manifest the exact situation that we were fearful of that we need to change that way of thinking and start thinking more positive since we are great people that anyone would consider lucky to be with.  So focus on yourself and good luck, hopefully we will both be submitting to the success stories someday. 

[seb913]

@David V: I'm kinda confused on what you're trying to say, ha. like if he was here, our relationship wouldn't have crumbled or even get to this point. I think the only reason it did was because I was getting paranoid and I was insecure due to long distance. I was always scared that he'd find someone better than me and that I was losing him, but the truth was, he was just busy. I was being dumb and impatient because I know he was trying his best to talk to me before our first break up.

@Calidris: yeah, our situations are a lot alike. because like you, I really do believe feelings are still there for both of us, it's just that he doesn't want to hurt me or himself. I think the both of us (as in you and me) reallyyy need to learn how to think positive, because that's what sends out positive vibrations and we need those in order for LOA to work. then once we do all the affirmations, visualizations, and working on OURSELVES first, then we can talk to them again. I know when I do talk to him, I'm not going to bring up trying again right away. I'm just going to talk and regain that talking habit, while still doing affirmations, visualizations, etc. we have to believe that the LOA method WILL, not just "can", work for us.

@Calidris (again. lol.): I just noticed you left the the third post X). haha. I read that post before, and I'm going to try what he suggests. and as for the submitting success stories, it's not "hopefully", we WILL ;]. yay for positive thinking.