Author Topic: Friendship problems (Have I reached the point of no return yet?) (Read 531 times)

Shohane · « **on:** May 25, 2012, 04:17:38 AM »

[ topic deleted ]

It's really the point of no return :/

Ginny · « **Reply #1 on:** May 25, 2012, 12:19:43 PM »

I don't think you ever reach the point of no return - you just create greater obstacles to the path back.

You both sound pretty volatile, and as if you often act without thinking or considering the other person's feelings (or if you do, you consider them only in so far as you can get revenge for whatever perceived slights).

You can't change his behaviour directly, but you can work on your own. Try to develop a bit more empathy (ie seeing things from his point of view, and giving him credit for possibly having motives that are not deliberately hurtful). And try practising unconditional love. So, this might mean in pactise, if you feel yourself getting angry, you ask yourself if that feeling is coming from a position of love, or because you want something from him that he is not giving you. If it's the latter, drop it. Unconditional live is just that - he doesn't have to give you anything, there are no strings attached. You just give (this doesn't mean you do anything you don't want to - you love yourself too. Just, don't get angry with him because he's not doing what you want. It's ... Sorry to be blunt here, but it's childish. And counterproductive)

Hope that helps some.

Shohane · « **Reply #2 on:** May 25, 2012, 11:18:40 PM »

How long should I wait before contacting him again?

Ginny · « **Reply #3 on:** May 26, 2012, 12:35:10 AM »

I am totally the wrong person to ask that question

- I can never let things lie. If I want to keep someone's friendship and there is a misunderstanding, i'll be straight on the phone to them. But I gather most people think this is the wrong thing to do, and that you should let them come to you (?)