Author Topic: Detachment (Read 1656 times)

beautifuldreamer · « **on:** January 17, 2012, 01:42:03 AM »

Hello everyone!

I want some advice on detachment. How does one achieve it? I've read the post here on detachment but I am still lost as to how to go about it. Anyone has success on detaching from a partner.

Ginny · « **Reply #1 on:** January 17, 2012, 02:07:18 AM »

Some people prefer to say non-attachment, rather than detachment. Detachment suggests that you don't care. Non-attachment suggests that you care, but that your happiness does not depend on the thing you desire.

As to how you achieve it - I suppose it can be as simple as realising that - that you can still be happy, even if you don't get the thing you desire. Enjoy the thought of it, but don't allow yourself to feel anguished if for some reason you think it might not come, or might be delayed in coming.

Any help?

truelove · « **Reply #2 on:** January 17, 2012, 08:25:45 AM »

From reading 'Ask And It Is Given' detachment/non attachment come when you are truly happy in the place you are with or without the thing/person situation you are choosing to manifest. You know that you are a complete being, with NOTHING missing. Your joy does not depend on getting the person/thing etc. So many of us, including me (Oh my goodness, I've really had to work on this, but just in the last few days things are starting to click!! ) think that we won't be happy unless we have XYZ, but it is this feeling that is blocking you from having it!!!
Once you get to the place where you love yourself and your life just the way it is, you are in the perfect place to say... "Yeah I would love to have this experience or that experience" your happiness doesn't depend on it but you know you would enjoy it.
Hope this helps!!

irishgirl69 · « **Reply #3 on:** January 17, 2012, 08:58:28 AM »

I think adding on to what Trace said (which is dead on), I think being truly detached means that things that happen along the way to your manifestation do not affect you. For example, I thought I was detached from my desire to be with my guy. I was feeling calm, peaceful, happy. I was living my life and feeling really good in my own skin. And I was believing and visualizing us together so easily. But then this weekend, I had a setback. I was hoping to see him and when it didn't happen, it really upset me. So, I wasn't fully detached. But I think that the setback was a good thing because it showed me I wasn't detached and I think helped to show me what I need to do to get there.

lashark · « **Reply #4 on:** January 17, 2012, 11:39:19 AM »

There is a sticky on detatchment pretty much telling you what you need to know. It was written by an aaaaamazing person that has had many successes. It explains what detatchment is and what it takes to achieve such a state. It is very easy to understand, I highly recommend checking it out.

There is also a stickied post full of nothing but success stories of those wanting and getting their exes back. Most of them mention what they did and mention how letting go was a big part in manifestation so, yeah there are many people that have been able to fully detatch from "a partner".

yolo7 · « **Reply #5 on:** January 17, 2012, 01:26:46 PM »

I wasn't sure where to post this because there is that sticky on detachment and relationships by angel_star that Lashark mentioned but I decided to post it here .. So I just wanted to share a small success with detachment with a friend of mine who doesn't know anything about LoA but detachment worked for her to get her ex back.

My friend and her guy broke up for about 9 months after dating for about 2 years. She was devastated and doing everything I was doing with my guy right now and I'm sure a lot of us were doing.. She was constantly contacting him, begging him to come back, being super negative, dwelling.. name it, she was doing it. Anyways after 6 months of going through so much hurt and pain, she finally realized one day that she didn't need her guy anymore, she didn't need him to make her happy and he was just holding her back. She finally gave her blessing to him (not in actual contact but in spirit) to be happy and that she wishes him well with whomever he chooses to be with. Then all of a sudden her guy was in contact with her. Saying how much he missed her and he's been miserable for the months they were apart but she ignored all of his messages because as much as he was saying all this, he made it still clear that he didn't want a relationship but missed her and so on.. She felt like she didn't need someone who wasn't sure of what they wanted and continue on with her life. She was truly happy and was finally moving forward.. her guy was still contacting her. She would say a few things here and there but nothing more than how her day was but most of the time would ignore him because he didn't want a relationship.. until something tragic happened in her personal life .. at first she didn't want to contact her guy.. but then one night he asked how her weekend was and she just told him everything. He instantly rushed to see her and after being there for her through this rough moment, he realized he wanted a relationship with her and they got back together. NOW, they are so happy together. A lot stronger than they have ever been. She said that she feels so detached with him even now in the sense if they were to break up again ( not that they would) she would be okay because this is the girl she is.. strong! She doesn't need someone to make her happy. She makes herself happy.

So this is my little story from a friend who doesn't know LoA but def detachment and just loving yourself and living your life is an important key to manifesting your desire. I know it's easier said than done.. trust me i know.. but I hope this helps

animor · « **Reply #6 on:** January 18, 2012, 03:35:43 AM »

I fing this detachment thing the most difficult one, to understand not to achieve.
If you are using LOA conciously you know you want the thing/person you want, you are asking for it, thinking of it, visualizing it. How can you do that with something you are not attached to? I understand that you shouldn't be attached to the outcome but how can this be done when you visualize and think of this outcome every day? How can you do this without getting attached? And I am asking for it, therefore it is important to me, so yes, I do care about the outcome obviously.

Personally, I did all the things I mentioned the last days, I meditate, visualize, send energy/love balls to my beloved man but it lasts the minutes it lasts. The rest of day, I try to focus on me, my job, my studies, and try to forget that I want it and asked for it, feel happy and complete with whatever other things or people I am up to. In addition, I don't care what's happening regarding the result, I don't think of how, when, what if he doesn't want/found someone else, it's none of my business.
But obviously I know that I am asking it because I believe that my life will be better like this. I guess that's attachment? How would I know when am not attached? I know it's not when you don't care and be interested in either.

Happybeingme · « **Reply #7 on:** January 18, 2012, 03:47:10 AM »

Detachment is a really hard concept to understand and to acheive. I have done it before and I still find it hard to do again. I wouldn't worry about it as long as you are happy and going about your day not worrying about it I think you are on a good path.

I do feel like detachment is the reason unconciciously using LOA can be easier than conciously using it.

marioska · « **Reply #8 on:** January 18, 2012, 04:28:37 AM »

Detachment is a great feeling, don't you think? I've kind of achieved it one time that I was really sad about my life in general, without knowing anything about law of attraction. But now, even that sometimes it's hard for me to be detached all day long, I'm having great succes and every day I become more and more detached. So I believe that we must make an efort, and with a bit of practice, we'll achieve it

beautifuldreamer · « **Reply #9 on:** January 18, 2012, 09:56:08 AM »

Quote from: lashark on January 17, 2012, 11:39:19 AM

There is a sticky on detatchment pretty much telling you what you need to know. It was written by an aaaaamazing person that has had many successes. It explains what detatchment is and what it takes to achieve such a state. It is very easy to understand, I highly recommend checking it out.

There is also a stickied post full of nothing but success stories of those wanting and getting their exes back. Most of them mention what they did and mention how letting go was a big part in manifestation so, yeah there are many people that have been able to fully detatch from "a partner".

I read the sticky a couple times. But I still felt unsure about what to do, that is why I decided to post here. Thank you everyone for your comments so far. I really appreciate them.

yolo7 · « **Reply #10 on:** January 18, 2012, 08:41:05 PM »

Quote from: Need2heal on January 18, 2012, 09:56:08 AM

Quote from: lashark on January 17, 2012, 11:39:19 AM
There is a sticky on detatchment pretty much telling you what you need to know. It was written by an aaaaamazing person that has had many successes. It explains what detatchment is and what it takes to achieve such a state. It is very easy to understand, I highly recommend checking it out.

There is also a stickied post full of nothing but success stories of those wanting and getting their exes back. Most of them mention what they did and mention how letting go was a big part in manifestation so, yeah there are many people that have been able to fully detatch from "a partner".

I read the sticky a couple times. But I still felt unsure about what to do, that is why I decided to post here. Thank you everyone for your comments so far. I really appreciate them.

I hope we can all help you and each other with what you wanted to know. How are you feeling about it now?

irishgirl69 · « **Reply #11 on:** January 18, 2012, 09:38:37 PM »

I think that detachment is really only possible with time - I'm not sure there is a specific process to help you get there. I think that detachment comes when you get to that place where you know without a doubt that what you want will manifest and for some people with some desires, that can only come with time and doing affirmations, visualization, etc.

Prior to this past weekend, I felt very close to detached. I was doing affirmations, visualizing, sending the energy ball, etc., and I was feeling very peaceful and calm. I was also getting signs daily (without asking for them) that told me I was on the right track. I feel like I got in my own way after that. Rather than accepting those feelings and signs and just going with the flow, I started to get attached again (wondering when, checking his Facebook profile all the time etc.) and then I tried to force something to happen.

But I don't think of it as a failure. A setback, yes, but not afailure. Where I am now is still having my desire but opening myself up more to the possibility of someone else. I feel like I've done everything I can do. I want this guy but I'm leaving it to the Universe at this point. If I think of him or get a sign, I just acknowledge it, express gratitude for it and move on. I don't check his Facebook page, I don't do affirmations, I don't send the energy ball to him. I don't feel the same as I was before this weekend but I know I'll get there again.

Tulip · « **Reply #12 on:** January 18, 2012, 09:59:21 PM »

Irishgirl69 you seem at peace, I can feel it in your post. Your method of detachment is really similar to how I started out. Allow me to offer a bit of advice?

When our head tells us we are detaching and something like the facebook incident happens- its the Universe telling you- your heart has not detached. I still get signs out of the blue but I tend not to take notice much as I dont want to question the Universe. I feel the Universe presents me with signs to test the strength of my faith- to see if I will over-analyze and ultimately- help me see if my heart has truly let go.

Detachment for me was inner peace and happiness directed towards ME. Its imperative you concentrate on what makes you happy and what you love about yourself. Do it for you, because you know your worth all of it- not because you want to allign with him.

It is a time thing and I think its great your moving at your pace. Hope that helped

animor · « **Reply #13 on:** January 18, 2012, 10:07:28 PM »

So in order to (or when you) get detached you stop doing affirmations, visualize, send balls, or whatever you used to do? Don't they help to direct your energy and increase vibrations?

Tulip · « **Reply #14 on:** January 18, 2012, 10:27:03 PM »

I found happiness in new hobbies, with my friends, began to love myself more and take care of myself. I increased my vibrations without him needing to be in my thoughts. To me- that's me trusting myself and providing my own happiness.

I affirmed/visualized as a safety net to stay connected to him.
Faith taught me its OK to let go.