Dazed and confused

[lovebird]

I'm so confused...this guy I have been in love with for over a year just added me as a friend on facebook, AND he subscribed to my updates as well. Then he unsubscribed. The subscription-thing is something he has done twice since easter.  I have that option so I guess I should just shut up I sent him a message on may 17th just wishing him well, and said that I was sorry not hearing from him again. In easter he wrote to me that he was moving and breaking up with his gf, but on fb it says he's still in a relatonship with her. I don't know what to think.

I have been trying to just let go...never mind him, and carry on with my old life...but you know how it is, it's hard to completely let go of someone that fills your emotions and mind so much. Since last summer my life has totally turned upside down, if it's because of this, or if it is the universe saying to me it's time to change, to make plans, to move on in life in general...oh, there's a lot of resistance left in me and I suppose I'll just have to wait it out and see how things unfold.

When I met him I was struggling with old familiar feelings of unworthiness, -he's too young, too clever, too handsome, too EVERYTHING for me, I wanted him, and then I was afraid of what he might think of me. Story of my life. He was in a relationship then, but nonetheless he swept me off my feet so completely, and I ran so fast LOL. Then came back, then ran again. I have been working intensely with my selfworth issues since joining the forum, and I think I see some progress My fears of rejections aren't so great anymore, and halleluja for that.

Still it kinda knocked me over seeing his friend request this morning, and I'm almost afraid to look inside his profile

Any advice for me?

[Free bird]

Currently, wat i can make out from ur post is that there is quite a lot negativity in u............u need to overcome tht in order to get in sync with the universe............u have fear of rejection, u think of urself inferior to his personality.............and secondly these social sites are quite misleading.........take a break from all of this.........if he is clever, intelligent and handsome then its time for u to wrk on urself.


I Hope that helps

Wish u best of LOA 

[Purple_Ray]

Hello,

Did this guy ever tell or do something towards you that made you thing he is too good, handsome , clever and so on for you? I must agree with Free bird...this belief is within you and you must clear it, you must work on you.You are worthy of everything you can or cannot imagine...that's not such thing as too smart, too handsome, too intelligent...  Maybe he also thinks about you that you are out of his league. You choose your reality, because you give a meaning to every situation. As for the thing he did not change his relationship status on  fb, I would not bother about this. I know people who don't change it, either because they forget , or because they want to avoid "relationship" status discussions or...it could be 1000 other reasons like laziness bla bla bla

[lovebird]

Thank you Daniela, and Free bird This fb-add probably means nothing, maybe he just thinks we have had enough contact for us to connect in that way. He had the most private profile page on the entire fb, so now I get to peek inside    Just can't figure out why he was so curious about me that he kept subscribing to my page, -it's kinda odd...maybe his way of determining "on a scale from 1 to 10, -how crazy is she?" LOL There was never a love relationship between us, just me being head over heels over him.

He never said a negative word to me. He is caring, empathic and kind with lots of humour. The reason I think/thought he was too good for me is that he is a highly trained academic in his field, he's 11 years younger than me, and he looks amazing! And I figured that he didn't think much of me because I'm older, don't have the work I'm trained for, actually partly unemployed, and I'm poor. And I struggle to get out of this situation, -I really feel I don't deserve to be in such a mess as I am in right now....but I work on my selfworth every day, what more can I do? I apply for work again, I'm moving, so I take it from there.

What kind of selfworth-training do you recommend? I have binaural beats that I listen to every day, I work on the emotional grid, I listen to Abraham (for over a year) I read books on selfsteem, and work my way through them, still it's this nagging feeling that I somehow don't deserve good things...it's killing me because I know it's NOT TRUE! I deserve love, abundance and good in life just like anyone, but time after time I catch myself with that awful feeling, although I'm better at keeping it away now than I used to be.

[lovebird]

Doesn't anyone else here struggle with these issues of self esteem and self worth? I know we all come with different baggage, genes and upbringing, -and how it affects each and every one of us is different. But a lot of people have trouble with this, and I am very interested to hear what you do to overcome it. The reason is that it touches every part of your life, -love, abundance etc, and in the end it determines your success of manifesting the things you really want. Please share

[Tulip]

I do islandgirl.
I have issues of self esteem but its a bonus for me that I've now recognized and admitted it because now I can change it.
I get really paranoid and depressed from time to time and I question why I would be liked by anyone. Even when guys mildly show interest, I over-analyse, I get attached within seconds and every little thing they do, I think its for my benefit like suddenly there world revolves around me.
Its insecurity on my part and I'm using subliminal at night and theta waves to alter this. I've requested to the Universe, a change in my esteem, and thats what I will get! Hang in there!

[Love is here]

Ive read every post you have made about this man and my guess is that there is definitely an attraction from him to you. I dont think its one sided. I dont think you are imagining a connection but alot of times with men especially ones that are handsome, successful and a catch to a wide variety of women and know they are, they dont pursue every attraction or connection they have cause they dont have to. Basically he may be attracted to you but in his head he may want something different or see himself with something different and he wont put real effort into pursuing a woman unless she matches up with what he has in mind for himself in the long run.

As for self esteem, affirmations as well as working through pain from the past that led to low self esteem and moving on from that has worked wonders for my self esteem. I also listen to music that helps affirm me and makes me feel stronger and more beautiful. I have written down what I liked about myself and go over that list ever so often. Just from your posts I can tell you are a genuine sweet lady and probably attractive too, you deserve someone thats crazy about you. I know whats thats like to attract everyone except the one you want but believe and affirm that your true soulmate is coming, dont settle for a man who's only so so about you or one you even have to analyze. When someone really wants you, they dont make you spend alot of time wondering or analyzing behavior. You'll know for sure.

[lovebird]

I have been thinking along these lines today as well, believe it or not. I've been bouncing back and forth between feeling not good enough for him and downright angry that he makes me feel that way. And yes, my selfesteem is too fragile right now to keep up this kind of interest in a man I have to analyze and guess about all the time. He's such a piece of work that I have made up my mind to let go. REALLY let go!! And get mad! All day today has been a struggle to maintain some sort of balance between feeling anger and feeling good about myself, not becaue of him, just for my own sake. Him being nice and friendly is not enough, I need more than that.