Complete beginner

[Prince Andrei Bolkonsky]

I will not reveal the every day details of my life, nor will I expose my age.

I'm in my early 20's and still a virgin. I should not complain, since there are older men in my situation; and I have improved - a lot! Three years ago, I couldn't look people in the eyes and walked around with my head bent down. And I spent entire summers home alone, playing computer games. I work now, I have eye-contact, and I do answer questions.

But I have no friends, when I should be enjoying my youth and party. (Thinking of getting my GED and go to college for the latter.) And I need a girlfriend, I don't mean that I would like one, I wanted one when I was 20. I need one now, the uncontrolable urges to spread my genes kind of way.

Why am I telling you all of this? Maybe cause I'm lonley? I know it will get better, I'm just hoping that you Law-of-attraction guys' could help speed it up?

[Butterfly]

Hi, congratulations on your honesty... you should be very proud of yourself actually.. but for you I would say its important to remember that your NEED is what is preventing you from getting what you want.. I have learnt that the hard way too..I can highly recommend you read THE SECRET to get you started on your new path...you have so much to offer someone, see that as something special and not something to be ashamed of..love and light to you, x

[Andrew Wilkie]

Prince,

If you're a complete beginner, rock on. You're about to start a fantastic journey in to YOU.

How about this for a start?

What's you real name? Maybe it is Prince Andrei Bolkonsky. Yet,I know that as a character in War and Peace. To have read that by 20 is pretty something. Yes, I've actually known somebody who we all had to call Prince, because he was a real a prince back in Africa.

Why do I say this? To begin pushing your comfort boundaries and zones.

As Butterfly says the more you need, the more it isn't going to happen. Not to say that it will not.  The more you need it, the more you believe it isn't actually going to happen.

To Dos.

These are never just one offs. They change as you change, notice things you would like or not like.

Do you actually know what you want in a girlfriend and relationship? You're after qualities and traits, not a specific person. If you know of a specific person what is it in them that you like?  Don't worry, my first list of wants was massive! The more specific you are in traits and ideas the better.  They can always change.

1 Write down your ideal day with this woman. From start to finish. Write it in the present tense and use positive words. Use as much sensory based language as possible i.e. I see, feel, hear, smell, touch etc.  Once done, carry it around with you or a short version in you wallet or bag etc. Whenever you have 5 minutes read it again, and again, and again.

You're begin to imprint your mind with what you want. You're tell ing the universe that you are starting to get serious about finding somebody. It is becoming more than just a wish.

The more you read it, the more you'll notice present tense mistakes, and where you can add more detail to really juice it up. You ideal day script has to really excite you.  It's fine if this takes 100s of writings.  By the time you have it, you'll be flying.  End it by writing "this or something better". Once you have read it, just say Thank You for bringing this to me.

2.How can you change your loneliness? Get out! Turn off the computer games. Just start walking around your neighbourhood, say hello to people, buy coffee, sit down, watch, read a book. This will do two things, start you off being comfortable around people and the more people you have around you, the more you can meet. Relationships and friends is a numbers game.

If you're given the opportunity to go somewhere, do something that involves others...DO IT!  Yes, if you've said no in the past, it will take time for people to ask you again. Yet, if you're out and about and people wonder where you are off to, even if it is the library, they will want to hang around you.

3.Now that you have written your perfect day, find or create your own images, words of inspiration, music (be very of the lyrics!) and start sticking them on your own Relationship Vision Board or journal that you can carry around with you. You want to see this board often, at least when you wake up and just before you go to sleep and bed. Any more is brilliant. Also you can take single images or words around with you. Put them on your desk at work. Use some as your wallpaper on your PC. The more you see it, the more you're telling you and the world that is what you want and are manifesting.  If you notice if, buts, maybe, doubts etc. The more you review you board and ideal day, the more you'll get over this.  EFT also helped me.

My advice would be don't tell anybody what the images are or what they mean on your board. Most others will want to 'destroy' it or bring you down. Just let them experience the joy when you start deliberately getting what it is that you want.  When creating, it can be as X rated as you want. When you create a board or journal, you have no limits apart from your own imagination.  There are no limits in time, space, money etc.

4. Do it all over again for other areas of your life.

So today is the weekend. No better time to start.  Finding the perfect images always juices me up. I get so excited.

The next question is normally, how long will it take? As long as it needs to. Basically that means, when you believe that it will happen 100% (feeling) it will and when you think you are worthy and deserving in what you want. Again, there are feeling based. It will all happen.

Rock On!

[Sneha Kulkarni]

hi andrew!!

Been reading a lot of your post, Every one wants their
Ex back but is there any tips or suggestion for people who are looking out for a specific person who is just a friend or acuqtaince whom they feel can be the right partner for them. many ask me this and after explainging the whole process they tell me sneha how can we disturb some one free will.. what if that person has no feeling for me. what would you suggest such people who want to attract particular  specific friend into their life.

sneha

[Prince Andrei Bolkonsky]

Put them on your desk at work.

I might get to have a desk at my workplace after that I got a GED and a college degree.

I have no contacts nor an education. The closest thing to a desk I get is a mop. 

[Andrew Wilkie]

Prince,

Carry around a "reminder card" with you. On the card, put phrases that remind you about what you want on it.

You could also use something like a blank pockmod card - www.pocketmod.com/ or just carry a folded piece of paper around with you full of images of your end results.

If you have an mp3 player, why not record your ideal day script as an mp3 and listen to it often.

Whenever you have a spare few minutes or are 'mopping' the floor get listening.

You can mop and visual at the same time.

[matthewferry]

Remember to be yourself. You know what you want and that is good. And you have a clear objective to fulfill. Keep a positive attitude and believe that you will get that. Don't be in a hurry. Be patient.

[kimberlyd999]

Prince,

Good job for being completely honest.  That truly is a huge start!  Have you seen The Work with Byron Katie?  If not google her and watch some of her videos on YouTube.  You will be amazed to discover just HOW much we are not our stories about ourselves! 

Katie has such compassion and I think you will find her quite amuzing! 

Great job for reaching out!  My son is 16, he does not have a girlfriend either.  I teach him that his most important job is loving himself inside and out!  How much can he loves himself and give himself the nurturing he craves in another?

How can you love yourself more today and give yourself the nurturing you seek in another?  How can you talk better to yourself on the inside?
What thought is causing you the most pain? 

Each day find the thought that is causing you the most pain and download a free copy of "The Work" on Byron Katies website and as you do the work your thoughts will loosen like a loose tooth and you will begin to see just how much control over your reality that you really have! 

We are not our thoughts!  Isn't that freeing!


Lots of Love to you on your journey!

[bweston]

Hey Prince,

I think everyone has provided great advice so far. My only addition to this would be to also work on beliefs that are holding you back. These can be relating either to yourself, your environment, or whatever else. The Work has already been recommended. Here are some of my other favorites:

- EFT: emofree.com
- write out memories or experiences that you think are holding you back. Now, either in your head or on paper, "re-write" them. Write them the way you wished they turned out. Your brain can't tell the difference between something that's imagined and something that's "real", so give it the memory you want.
- There's also the Lefkoe method

Feel free to message me if you want more help.

Take care,
Ben