Any advice for this case? LOA in a broken LDR....

[57angel]

...but I thank God for making that possible, not him. It bothers me much to see that he's unable to see certain truths and rejects the knowledge of them... so I hope he's on his way of realizing... At the same time, I am quite aware that if he does that and switches from his unfriendly attitude back to a loving one, then it would instantly change my feelings too. Under the influence of love, I become a different person!
These men have to begin realizing what role they're having and that they're missing big time...

Something to share with you all on "strong woman and the woman of strength. Here it is, "A strong woman makes mistakes and avoids the same in the future...a woman of strength realizes life's mistakes can also be unexpected blessings and capitalizes on them...A strong woman has faith that she is strong enough for the journey, but...a woman of strength has faith that it is in the journey that she will become strong"

We just keep loving ourselves and sharing love to everyone as well - the men in our lives will then realize what they missed when they know who they have let go

[Priestess]

Hello everyone, I'm back after some days...
I avoid thinking how many months have been since I last talked to him. I'm not ready to face such thoughts. I haven't made spectacular changes lately, but I'm very fine most of the time. Concerning myself, I've come to a place where I'm very certain of my belief system and what I am as a person. I feel i am no longer searching for anything and I only have to keep learning and growing. Oh well, I do search for something, however: signs.

I have no clue how he feels about me know or if he ever thinks of me... I think of him in every moment and I usually think lovingly. Most of the time I am absolutely convinced our story is about to go on somehow. I believe in a wonder to happen. He's growing, like I've been, so he's bound to cross a good path again.
I still have moments when I break down and cry. I'm no longer that angry (because I avoid the thoughts about what he did to me)... Something changed here, in the nature of my tears. They are no longer for myself that much, but for him. I feel sad for his soul. It's like the feeling of a mother who has raised a nice, kind, loving child, but who has become a scandalous teenager, a rebel without a cause, roaming with dangerous gangs and doing nasty things. And I cry for the path he's taken.

As I mentioned in other posts, his best friend as well as a friend of mine are both involved. Or not really involved, but rather 'caught in the middle'. My friend now seems to be a bit more empathic towards me. I used to think he isn't open to ideals of love, but recently he told me that love is always supposed to be above and win. I was glad to see that. Also, my guy's best friend got back to me. We used to discuss philosophical matter passionately, then he suddenly stopped contacting me. I thought it must have been some negative influence on him etc.... but deep inside i knew it can't be like that and he'd write me again one day. And he did. He apologized for his absence, telling me that he had some revelations and had to integrate them in his life. We are enjoying great conversations again and, to be honest, I start liking his ideas more and more. This thing helps me be more positive.

So... these 3 guys (him, his best friend and my friend) still have the plan of taking that trip together. I have no clue what's going to happen then. I spoke to my friend and asked him to help me get my message through.... I really want my guy to hear certain things through someone else... so we are arranging some kind of lines that must get to him.... I don't know if it's ok to do this. I know this is one last thing left to try, but I don't want to be forcing the universe. I'm hoping that if my friend tells him something, he will be a little more open and reconsider things, reconsider my point of view and the way he's been contradicting himself... The plan is quite a complex one. The point is to help him see that all he thought about me was simply not true. He made those accusations out of thin air.

About the "living my life" part... I got that cool work contract I visualized, but some details were not right. I mean... there were things standing in my way, I could not sign it. I've also been pursuing some other jobs (it's great I have what to pursue - there used to be nothing for me!!), yet nothing is definite yet... time is running, I had clear plans for this summer and still do, but I feel like something is standing in my way!! I want to have those money and that time by myself and to be able to travel, so i can live my dreams!... there is a higher plan for me... but which?! If the universe wants me to stay in this country when they arrive, it should give me better signs, because i'm set on leaving before then!! I can't figure out what's going on...

I keep having dreams of him every night. The same dream... he's here, close to me, we're fixing things and looks like he wants to get close to me... It's strange how I get almost no variations, despite of all the visualization I have. I mean, my daydreams about him are so diverse, yet the dreams are stuck with the same setting and script.

These days, my feeling is that I don't know where my life is taking me... I enjoy the ride, yeah, but it's hard to keep away from anxiety. The more I stay here doing nothing, the worse it is for my future and my family.

[57angel]

You have definitely come a long way and made you a better and happier you I am sure that everything will fall into place because you deserve to have only the best.

[LeyLine]

Priestess hi

I just read through your post..now, your situation has so many similarities with mine! I too met my guy online..there was an instant connection...we were each others love and best friend, till he came here....when he left for his country, he changed...he would accuse me of imaginary things, and he would find flaws in everything i did (even my accent in english bothered him, the very accent that he was finding irresistibly sexy just weeks before). I can say he was transformed into an entirely different man, someone i hardly knew...he called me crazy, obsessed, said he didnt want anything to do with me, said he had no feelings for me...

Priestess, i advice u to look into the symptoms of depression in males...see if that rings a bell. Guy get depressed differently than we girls do...actually a depressed guy has many similarities with the typical a*hole

To the hopeful part now....i already told you how many similarities our situations had...well, my guy and i are meeting in the end of the summer again, more than a year since our break up, to give our love one more chance. See, Priestess, impossible is nothing....so dont lose your spirit, never....if you feel that you two are not over, and this break up is just temporary, then you can be 100% sure that you are right...take all this wonderful advice that ppl here are giving you, and most important do whatever makes u happy...avoid things that make u unhappy....for instance , if u have a talk with your guy and he starts saying to u things that are lowering your vibration, stop the convo...this is what i did...no matter how much i wanted to talk to him, i would cut him politely short if he started his accusations again....and after the initial shock of the first 2-3 times, he started to be more careful of his sayings...after all ppl do to us only what we allow them to do

[Priestess]

@57angel:
thank you! You were one of the first one to 'take care of me' here! indeed... I survived to this day and this can only be a great victory...

@LeyLine:
So many similarities, yeah.... So, when your guy came there - was it the only visit he made there? It seems like he had a 'shock' of some kind, a mismatch and maybe that's where you got the hint of depression? I've read much about male psychology and possible issues and I've wondered if he was depressed indeed... We met several times before, but it was summer/autumn. This time it was midwinter and he was already being long deprived of light (due to living way up in the north). It's a terrible seasonal depression that most northerners have... I tried to reason with him, but he said he felt better than ever! (!?) That hurt me so badly... 'cause I was taking into account all factors, thinking about his health and issues, we were in the middle of that unexpected break up, but he was telling me how great he feels about his life. I simply don't understand this. I will look deeper into male depression however, it's a good point.

About the sudden changes, I see you had your share... the accent thing is a stunning one. That indeed sounds like an unhealthy switch being produced in his mind. Oh, it reminds me of so much... He used to love the little weird things about me (which I usually disliked a lot! ) like my voice, my hand gestures... and so much more!

Could you please tell me if you guys kept in touch while you were separated? It's amazing that he wants to give a new try this summer, I am very happy for you!! Looks like he managed to keep his love alive.... That's really, really beautiful... and I surely congratulate you for your side in the story!

[LeyLine]

Yeah he came one time, for a month..but he ended up staying three...he wanted to stay for good, but we couldnt do all the necessary paperwork (im a greek and hes an american). I guess that the fact that he had to leave in the end, after all the dreams and hopes he had invested in staying permanently, shocked him (and depressed him). I think that subconciously he held me responsible for not be able to keep him in the end - of course he knows that i didnt make the laws that make it so difficult to issue residency and work permits, but still...

We were in touch yes, but right after the break up and for the next 2-3 months, communication was a real hell...he would talk to me just to curse on me and accuse me, and i was ending up crying and feeling miserable every time....LOA changed all this...affirmations, visualising, and most of all i stopped allowing him to use me as a boxing sack, by starting to love myself more and keeping my vibration high at all costs...gradually, he changed, and we didnt have a fight since last october

Keeping his love alive...i cant speak for him and i cant make assumptions..what i can speak of, is myself. I kept MY love alive, and also my firm belief  in HIS love, even when i had no clue that he loved me at all..once i read in a random book the phrase *always keep your eyes on the ball, even when you cant see the ball*,so i tried to do exactly that. I know that my friends and family were insisting that this guy cant have any feelings for me, and even my own *logic* said the same thing, but i choose to ignore hem and keep my eyes on teh ball...and finally it manifested

[Vicki Christina]

Leyline,  Thank you for sharing your progress and story again.  It is such an inspiration to so many people who have had no contact or almost no contact from their love.   It's about vibration and focus, and you are again reminding all of us the bottom line.  Keep up the good vibes!  VC

[Priestess]

LeyLine,

I'm being grateful for your story! thank you for sharing the details!
To keep your eyes on the ball is a very good 'strategy', I can feel its trueness... Maybe this is what I have inside of me that's giving me the feeling "I can't let go of my dreams of him" and all else that keeps me thinking of our love and how it can continue...

You've also opened up a complex topic on the subconscious mind... and how it may hold beliefs that the person in cause is not even aware of... Yeah, it can always be something like this, I guess. A very different belief they wouldn't acknowledge consciously, but which would dictate their conclusions.

About the inferno of your conversations for those months you mentioned... Many relationship gurus say that anger and hate are not the opposites of love. Instead, ignoring someone is. It wasn't bad (though it felt terrible) that he was cursing you and making you feel miserable through his words... It is a weird way of saying out loud that one's still involved and cares... When that tension is gone, the real things reappear at the surface. Honestly, I'd rather have my guy accuse me again and argue with me... than this silence.... this complete avoidance...
I really gotta do some EFT on how afraid I am that he'd never want to hear of me again...

Well, LeyLine, I'm doing what you did, keeping my eyes on the ball, even when it's not in the view. I decided to talk less and less about him to my friends. They try to push their logic on me and take away any hope that love can win and that he can become a kind person again. It feels so bad when they do that... I know they want what's best for me in their hearts, but at the same time I know the best what's inside my heart and the nature of my experience.

[Priestess]

My dear friends, it's very nice to see the changes within myself indeed, I realize...
When I discuss with my friends what happened with the relationship, it's not like before. We used to indulge - both me and them - in negative conversations, in which we were endlessly criticizing my man and victimizing myself. Nowadays, the situation is so different.... My friends are still very negative about him and I don't feel that anymore... I no longer want to talk about the things he did! I'm focusing so much on his lovely traits and on possible outcome that there's barely any room for negative manifestations in my life!

Of course, I'm not perfect yet.... My big problem is that I am still vulnerable to things directly connected to my man. When I'm in my own world and minding my own business I'm fine, calm, positive. But when something directly connected to him appears (like seeing status updates from his friends...), my mood suddenly and drastically deteriorates. I could spend days visualizing a happy encounter with him, but if he'd appear in front of me in the flesh, I'd be all lost and overwhelmed..... I hope that, with the time, this weakness will go away! For most of the time my mind is being entertained with nice thoughts though... and I feel their effect on the quality of my life... hopefully one day i'll be ready to meet him for real, and maybe that's the moment when he'll be ready to meet me too. It makes sense, don't you think?
Anyway... I am so convinced that this love is forever 

[57angel]

Leyline, thank you for sharing your progress, it indeed inspires me, someone who is still waiting for my Mr. Right, a reminder that LOA always works when we truly believe no matter what the circumstances are!

Priestess, yes it does make sense! You too will meet for real when you are both ready to start and have a very happy and loving relationship. Just keep on working inwards, the path towards him is getting closer, enjoy your journey!

[Priestess]

57angel, don't just wait, KNOW he is on the way!  I am so convinced now myself that my love is on his 'journey' towards me... I don't mean it as a physical journey, but a mental and spiritual one... It feels just right to know that!

Working inwards, yes...  I do enjoy the journey, thank you!!

Wow, it's the 3rd or 4th day in which I get the 444 sign... the numbers in sequence.... I wonder what it means! Looking for the angel number meanings, the 444 sequence has 2 explanations: a good and a bad one... the bad one tells that "the angels don't agree with you"... well, this gets me confused. This meaning is not in all sources.

Other than that, I got some other signs too. Yesterday I found a text written in his language, which is such a rare sight!! also, I don't find an explanation why would it be in that language here, where there's no connection... so unrelated to anything here... and, one recent evening, I was on a central street in my city, where there was an open air contest or exhibition of some kind, I don't know. Instead of mainstream music or anything one would expect for that kind of event, there was underground music from his country!! Moreover, it was a band which be both love and watched in concert last summer! How could I not think of him?....

[57angel]

Priestess, thank you for the reminders They say that when we eliminate doubts and fears in our words, we completely eliminate it in our lives hahaha When I meditate every day, actually twice a day, I am so sure of how I am asked to be engaged to him, the place is so vivid and everything else - it sometimes made me cry as if I am on that real situation I don't even know which part of the globe that place is, I just looked at that place in the internet. I am so sure now that the time will surely come, and it is already a reality in my mind

[Nicole Smith]

I'm also experiencing a similar situation. Thanks for your advice guys. For Priestess, you can do it, girl!

[Priestess]

Nicole, thank you!! best wishes to you, be tougher than the tests coming your way!

57angel, you're welcome. Also, interesting reminder about the language... I got to be familiar with that theory... but I am not always watching my language. From time to time, however, I am careful to express myself in positive and inspiring words - because they trigger better response in those that may hear me anyway. I guess it's a double benefit - it probably triggers better things in my brain too.
Hmmm, nice visualization, seems like a powerful one! Oh, why wouldn't it happen just like that for you?...