Act as if you already have it

[Peace]

The film on LOA says that we should behave and feel as if we already have what we wish.
If we wish a specific person, what does this involve?

Does it involve talking to her/him as if she was already our partner/consort?
Wear a wedding ring?

Guys... I know my questions sound a bit strange, but I really am confused on how exactly to use LOA and so I ask questions. I'd appreciate if someone answered...

[Wj-How]

Hi Peace. Im How. Im actually facing this problem too. But in my case, I actually act as if she's my partner. Whenever my friends or mates ask me whether is she my girl, I just simply smile and nod. Im treating her as if she's my girlfriend showering her with love, just like in the website it says "When you send loves, loves come back to you." thats what im doing. When I got back home, I visualize us being together while making short outcomes like she's my official girlfriend and Im hers vice versa.

Furthermore, I also stay detached by stop logging into facebook for few months already and shut off my cellphone. But when you are with her, dont focus fully on her until you abandoned your own stuffs. Thats what I am doing. I am not sure whether I am right or wrong.

Feel free to correct me and comments. Thanks

Love,

How.

[Sneha Kulkarni]

hi
Its all about power of "Now". By act it means be the state of happiness start noticing positive things around you instead of negative, when you go shopping start buying stuff of his or her liking. keep one of you wardrobe side so that you partner can keep his or her clothes. sleep on one side of the bed as if you keeping a place for your partner besides you, while you drive feel him or her on your side seat . Most important is giving the right vibrations to the universe.

sneha

[Peace]

hi
Its all about power of "Now". By act it means be the state of happiness start noticing positive things around you instead of negative, when you go shopping start buying stuff of his or her liking. keep one of you wardrobe side so that you partner can keep his or her clothes. sleep on one side of the bed as if you keeping a place for your partner besides you, while you drive feel him or her on your side seat . Most important is giving the right vibrations to the universe.

sneha

Thanks. And what about when communicating directly with HER?

I mean, if we aren't REALLY already together, and I start telling her sweet things, she will be scared away... isn't it? (well, that seems to have happened to me these days... I tried showering her with compliments and stuff, but she kept withdrawing more and more, despite being initially very close to me).

Oh, and there's a second problem I am concerned about. When I am happy and positive, many other girls start flirting with me even if I don't want them. What do I have to do in that case?

[Sneha Kulkarni]

hi!

What ever you wrote was quite humorous about other gals flirting with you!! .Well i feel you dont have to shower some one with too much of compliments because this shows your too attach to its outcome , just be your self and automatically there will be a way out from the universe like an idea to make things happen or some act where in it will not feel an effort!!

sneha

[Peace]

hi!

What ever you wrote was quite humorous about other gals flirting with you!! .Well i feel you dont have to shower some one with too much of compliments because this shows your too attach to its outcome , just be your self and automatically there will be a way out from the universe like an idea to make things happen or some act where in it will not feel an effort!!

sneha

Thank you once again for your reply, Sneha.

I think I understand better now, even though it seems counter-intuitive: so "being detached from outcome" basically means NOT putting any effort? That means my effort to avoid other girls so that my girl wouldn't get jealous was useless?!

However, regarding the showering with compliments: that came really spontaneous and effortless...
I really keep getting the impression that the more I am myself and let things happen automatically, the more she disappears from my life... (this happened the past 2-3 weeks)

I am confused as ever... sorry for not understanding

[Sneha Kulkarni]

hi peace!!

Thats what exactly happens when you try be yourself you feel the things getting far from you.. but as time passes you will realize thats not true, in fact things are getting more and more closer to your heart, have patience and try it out:)
sneha

[Peace]

hi peace!!

Thats what exactly happens when you try be yourself you feel the things getting far from you.. but as time passes you will realize thats not true, in fact things are getting more and more closer to your heart, have patience and try it out:)
sneha

I sincerely hope this is true... cause I really feel as if I was onto something, we were almost about to officialize our relationship, and now we didn't talk to each other for almost a week...

I hope this is not an excuse so that I just forget her and start looking at other girls, because right now I am really in a phase in which I could almost return to my old playboy lifestyle... which is something I really wanted to overcome.

I'm confused... I truly hope you are right, or I will never try any of this selfhelp stuff again...

[Peace]

I had 4 days of exams. I hadn't heard from her for 4 days.
And when I go online to talk to her, normally, she goes offline before I can even say "Hi".

Can somebody please confirm to me whether this truly means I am attracting her? I am truly freaking out...

[lee.see]

Hey Peace,

Couldn't help reading your posts (hope ya don't mind).

If you read back on all of your posts, you will notice something in each and every one. FEAR. To quote: "I am truly freaking out", "I sincerely hope this is true", "I hope this is not an excuse so that I just forget her and start looking at other girls" and "I truly hope you are right, or I will never try any of this selfhelp stuff again". It's all fear, and working from a place of fear does not serve you my friend.

You know how you walk into a room where two people (a couple) have just had a major argument, yet you walk in once it's over and you can still feel the uneasy energy of it? Human beings aren't just meat-suits! Another example, say you're friends with someone and though they haven't told you or indicated anything - you know they like you more than friends but you don't feel the same way. Without WORDS, you know that. It is energy, frequency, whatever you want to call it, emitting out of us and out into the world. So with those examples take them and put them on yourself. If you are emitting fear, desperation, attachment - who's gonna feel that vibe from you?

Now I'm no blimmin' expert, but I got a fair idea that rings true in my heart (and most likely it'll be different in others and yours). I personally feel like a RETARD acting as if I'm already in a relationship and doing the things that indicate I am actually in one (when I'm not). So I stopped and I've gone back to myself, finding my happiness again. And that seems to work for me. Everyone is different though! So if you have an easier time imagining and visualizing being in the relationship - fantastic! Just be in it with love, gratitude and respect for YOURSELF. Like Sneha said, detach yourself from the outcome.

My experience was a little different, I don't think I actually thought of wanting my ex back but I thought about him all the time. Then one day, things just seemed better. I was moving on, getting happy again (hehe) though my ex lingered in the back of my mind, I didn't pay much attention to it. More like a distant memory, but in the midst of that I found my true self. My happiness, my love, my respect, I found me. So while I had stopped holding onto the relationship and the emotional charge around it and started focusing on myself and my happiness, what happened? He came back, literally out of no-where! He might as well have fallen out of the sky!

So we can give you all the advise in the world, but we can't walk your journey for you. That is up to you. You must bring yourself up to that higher frequency where you deserve to be! I read a post on here that was actually all very relevant, so I've attached a link. Have a read: It may help more. Good luck to you and your journey peace.

http://www.powerlawofattraction.com/forum/law-of-attraction-for-relationship/bible-of-getting-your-ex-back-dns-post/

[Peace]

Dear lee.see,

thank you very much for your elaborate response That's what I needed. I had the feeling as if most people were just copy-pasting wisdom quotes without really taking into consideration my specific situation...

You are absolutely right, I have fear: It is because everything was going quite well, even though not perfectly, until I started using Law of Attraction. That's when things started getting less stable. Also, ,y story is not about getting an ex back but, in case you didn't read it, http://www.powerlawofattraction.com/forum/law-of-attraction-for-relationship/occasion-to-acknowledge-our-love/

We are somewhere between friend-zone and romantic lovers, yet I am convinced through her behavior that there are moments in which she really wants to tell more but withdraws as soon as I try to reciprocate it. She often behaves in ways a normal friend would not behave.

Example conversation on chat...
She:"I always admire you, as usual..."
Me:"Me too! I admire..."
She:"Sorry, I must get some urgent stuff done. See you later. Bye!"

Ever since I started using Law of Attraction, communication has been getting worse.

To be more specific about my fear: I fear that there are certain spontaneous behaviors about myself that aren't productive for a love relationship. But I don't understand whether LOA says to do what is most spontaneous even if it is obviously negative.
i.e. I would effortlessly openly insult the other guy, but I don't do it because I know that if I did (he's also her friend after all), I might loose her even as a friend.

I fear that I have not understood LOA properly. I fear not understanding the signs properly. And in general I fear that whatever I am doing, I am doing it wrong.

Everything was so much better before LOA...

But my worst fear is that whatever nice things existed, it's too late to get back to that point.

Please note that my fears are more about the instructions and interpretation of LOA, and not on emotional dependency on her or such things. I love her unconditionally, I'd love her even if she totally disappeared from my life and I'll never meet her again. She was my first best friend.
But I would deeply regret loosing her because of trivial mistakes that arose because I behaved in the wrong way.

My common sense says I shouldn't publicly insult the other guy. But when I use LOA, I feel that's the right step to display my power and conquer her as my wife...

[lee.see]

Woah okay, no one can 'conquer' anyone. That is a possessive trait that doesn't serve anyone. Re-read the message you just wrote. Fear. You cannot create in someone's reality. You can however create in your own.

There is no 'right' or 'wrong' way of using LOA. It just is. No matter what, it is always working - period. You're feeling fearful, you're attracting fear. You're feeling happiness, you're attracting happiness. You're feeling neediness, you're attracting more neediness. Get it?

LOA isn't a degree or college paper or an exam. It is life. The people who discovered it just managed to give it a name so we could understand it better. It's there whether we are aware of it or not, always has been. The reason you think things have gotten worse since you became aware of LOA is because you weren't aware of the things beforehand. If you have time (and the patience) go onto The Secret website and download the PDF file 'The Science of Getting Rich'. Though the title veers away from what we are talking about. The principles apply to everything in life.

Working on yourself, bettering yourself is the HARDEST work you will ever do in life. EVER. It will not be easy. Things will pop up and you will be made aware of all of this things, many you wont like, but it is your strength and courage and whether you are truly willing to get yourself to that point.

Re-read the post again. It's all about she said this, she does that, she's like this. If you could really let someone be, love them unconditionally even if they weren't in your life, you would not be here writing about it. You would be free off in your everyday life, living, learning and loving. So take your attention away from her and what you don't want, stop putting the blame label on everything and place the attention on yourself. Become aware of yourself. Be your best friend! I'm becoming my best friend again, and oh my gosh do I have fun. Do things for you, take yourself out to dinner to a really expensive restaurant you like. Why? Cause you deserve it! If you have a favorite hobby, do that! If you love hanging out with mates, family etc, do that! You will notice being around the people you love and doing these things you love will be like a simple effortless energy that's blissful. That is the energy, the frequency you should always be at. Notice how the fear won't be there when you really are content with whatever you are doing, whoever you are with.

This is amazing insight for me as well! We are all learners here, always will be.

[Peace]

Woah okay, no one can 'conquer' anyone. That is a possessive trait that doesn't serve anyone. Re-read the message you just wrote. Fear. You cannot create in someone's reality. You can however create in your own.

I used extreme words. Sorry. What wanted to say was simply that I was absolutely sure about being just one step from success...

There is no 'right' or 'wrong' way of using LOA. It just is. No matter what, it is always working - period. You're feeling fearful, you're attracting fear. You're feeling happiness, you're attracting happiness. You're feeling neediness, you're attracting more neediness. Get it?

I was referring to the advice usually given on attracting a specific person. For example, many posts here talk about following signs and things like that. The point is that all signs can be ambiguous and have extremely, radically, opposing interpretations. She went offline without even talking to me. Does that mean she is avoiding me? Or does she just need some "me-time"? Or is she preparing something special for me? Oh, and then I often see things in my daily life that remind me of her... but do those signs mean "Get closer to her!" or "Get away from her!"?

It's all about she said this, she does that, she's like this. If you could really let someone be, love them unconditionally even if they weren't in your life, you would not be here writing about it.

Because I WANT her I would love her if I lost her, but as long as I can return to where we left and improve our relationship, I'd see it as a lost opportunity. Also, please note that everything I said about her here is because I don't know how to interpret her behavior in light of what LOA suggests.
I'm not sure whether you understood properly, but I really have the feeling that she changed as a CONSEQUENCE of my LOA-relationship-seeking behavior.

You would be free off in your everyday life, living, learning and loving. So take your attention away from her and what you don't want, stop putting the blame label on everything and place the attention on yourself. Become aware of yourself. Be your best friend! I'm becoming my best friend again, and oh my gosh do I have fun. Do things for you, take yourself out to dinner to a really expensive restaurant you like. Why? Cause you deserve it! If you have a favorite hobby, do that! If you love hanging out with mates, family etc, do that! You will notice being around the people you love and doing these things you love will be like a simple effortless energy that's blissful. That is the energy, the frequency you should always be at. Notice how the fear won't be there when you really are content with whatever you are doing, whoever you are with.

I know. I already do these things. I don't need to be lectured over and over again on how to love myself because I already did it long before I even knew LOA.

I am using LOA solely for the purpose of improving my relationship with HER.
I am already happy with almost every other aspect of my life.

I repeat: I started fearing as a consequence of my use of LOA in trying to improve this specific relationship.

[lee.see]

If this is so, everything should be fine.

What I've come to learn is, a person will listen when they are ready.

So good luck to you peace I wish you all the best.

[brian_bluesky]

Hi Peace,

I think both of us are the same people confusing & feeling fearful of whether we are applying LOA correctly.

I had posted my question in this forum before where discussing about my confusion of using LOA to attract my ex. In your post here, I can feel your fearful, frustration of not getting the outcome you wished. Your stubbornness to search "answer that you wanted to hear of" would never appear till you are really letting go your stubbornness.

I would like to share some of my thoughts with you at here :

Galia had suggested me that the most important is to "LETTING GO" which means regardless what methods you are using but as long as it can make you to feel good, happy & stop thinking "Needy" your partner. Though I am still learning to apply this method but I found it quite true in the sense to search my own happiness. This does not mean I do not love her, but I wanted to improve myself of both mental & physical before anything of me&her happens.

I know it is hard for you at this moment of not thinking her. But most of the people are saying the same thing where at the end of the day, we are the one cause the feeling we have. Why not you temporarily put her aside, start focusing your own stuff? I know it is hard again, but trust me, I have gone thru this few weeks ago. But now I started not feeling "needy" sometimes which I think it indicates that I am improving myself how to "detach from the outcome".

It is just my two cents advice though I am still learning it. Hope someone can correct me if what I have said is wrong. Thanks.

Just as your nickname, PEACE & love to you. Good day !!