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Author Topic: I wish I knew back then what I know now  (Read 571 times)

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Offline Plissken

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I wish I knew back then what I know now
« on: May 28, 2019, 01:46:34 AM »
I wish I knew then, even just a piece of what I know now. I wish I was just a fraction stronger then, and a bit wiser. We would still be friends, and I wouldn't have scared her away because of my fear. It hurts nearly every day, despite my best efforts, and it wont stop hurting. Its a very difficult cross to bear.

I may be an awful fool, but by God I wont stop trying. it meant too much to me.  Feeling something I never felt before, confusing myself with two different versions of myself and it turns out I may not be either. The only thing I know is I did have a heart because it disintegrated.

With faith, wit, grit and no small amount of courage, I will become a better person. One that can handle reconnecting with this person and not being so effected by her tragic past, though I feel I cannot do it alone.

Offline Alexbally

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Re: I wish I knew back then what I know now
« Reply #1 on: June 12, 2019, 02:17:42 AM »
Life is full of these lessons. It's only you that labels them as wonderful or painful and with every experience, you carve and forge who you are today. The truth is you are all of your experiences and yet, you are none, nothing. Every moment of your life has led you to where you are today.

Without reflection and deep contemplation, you will continue to make the same shitty mistakes and will continue to blame everything and everyone else other than yourself for your own misfortune. You however Plissken, appear to be ready to learn and to feel again, as drastic change generally only follows drastic tragedy.

People always come and people go, few remain for a lifetime. The way each of them impact your life will remain forever. This is your true blessing to take from it all.
You'll be a different man tomorrow and another different man the next day. Learn what your insecurities and fears are as it's these that make you react the way that you do. Learn them and change them.

All the best.

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