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Author Topic: I attracted himó He pursued me but he says he isnít attracted to me  (Read 2615 times)

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Offline Imitation_deg

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Re: I attracted himó He pursued me but he says he isnít attracted to me
« Reply #45 on: September 01, 2018, 08:21:56 AM »
Iíll keep this short but Iíd like some opinions about this...

So after he invited me over to his place while I was doing postmates, I asked him if I could visit him again later on in the week. He said sure...
And honestly, I wasnít expecting anything.
I just imagined looking cute and both of us spending time together.  To me, watching him work on the fence seemed like an intimate activity anyway, and I was happy with that.  No expectations.

So he let me stop by again...and I looked very cute.  And he was checking me out.  He had no guard up, no resistance, and he welcomed me into his home.  We hung out for an hour...before he tried to get things sexual and I took that as my cue to leave.
Regardless, he was so open and warm and it was sweet and comfortable.

We both will be busy soon and I was hoping we could do this again...maybe I was being pushy but I asked him a couple of more times since last week when he will be done with the project.
Also, it turns out that the hardware store he will be working at was the same hardware store I was going to take my woodworking classes...I was planning for over two years and am trying to figure out when I can take them.

So a few hours ago...
I was joking about stalking him, but it turns out he really believes it.  Because of the woodworking classes, but specifically how I was so close in his neighborhood when he texted me back...

And it hurt my feelings.  We got into a huge fight.  Iím not stalking him but these loa coincidences (there have been MANY) make him think Iím stalking him.
And he says I have a big neediness to know everything about him...
Because I ask him questions.

So I called him out on his behavior...for all the negative things heís said about me...
Why I wasnít good enough to be his girlfriend, and apparently, now why Iím not good enough to be his friend. 
I tried to get to the bottom of it, ask him where is all this is coming from, and he twisted it to me wanting to know everything.
So again I called him out on it....

The other day I asked him about his dating life...and I joked about him doing online dating.  He was being vulnerable and open with me about it, and told me he did want to meet someone.  And I told him Iíd help him with it, and he thought it was so weird that I would do that, since I like him...
And I told him...
Youíre a great guy.  Itís a waste youíre not with someone right now.
So he didnít believe me and to prove him wrong...I started creating his profile and it got to asking him some personal questions and I guess that made him shut down....But not before he tried to do his usual sexual thing, and once again, me rejecting him.

And the next day...we got into an hour-long fight, where he completely shut down on me and wouldnít give me the space to talk about things...

Yes, deep down I like him but I was accepting and embracing friendship with him...I was okay with being friends, and felt his friendship...

But this happened and just as I stopped engaging him sexually, I can stop engaging with him platonically, as well...and that makes me even sadder.  And I fear thatís the way itís going to go.

Offline TheLittleBat

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Re: I attracted himó He pursued me but he says he isnít attracted to me
« Reply #46 on: September 01, 2018, 08:25:34 AM »
Listen, everyone is you pushed out. He is a reflection of you.
You need to change your inner talkings and talkings about him.
Only then will you see outside change.

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Offline AngelusofftheSea

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Re: I attracted himó He pursued me but he says he isnít attracted to me
« Reply #47 on: September 01, 2018, 01:52:44 PM »
Imitation-deg,

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it. The Buddha

You have set up barriers before, were working on all that and now slid back. No guilt, none are perfect. BUT>.... this can be fixed.

One you can relate to guy talk much better than most women and embrace them as friends. Have you realized this?

So, when you vacillate or doubt yourself it sends not only mixed messages about your self worth, self love to yourself ( subconscious programming is always working) but confuses him so he goes back and forth about feelings for you then denies them as that is the energy you are sending. This is the mirror and thoughts you are thinking of yourself.

 STOP .... recalibrate.

Look within, meditate, go with some 528 hz for love. 432 songs to dissolve problems.

Use the mantras again. Use switch words LEMON DROP and dissolve the whole mess right now.

Put yourself back on the pedestal and see your self-worth, loving, loved, sexy and believe it no doubt. Give it a few days...

See he loves you, respects you and wants a relationship with you not just sex or friendship. GET The wanting you for sex out of your mind, thoughts or what you think about him. See the end result of what you want, no doubts and take a break from going around or calling him until you can get the energy to settle.

Don't be in need, lack or panic when you think of him. If so pivot and focus on you again, your fun goals, going out, your career, friends and hobbies. When you think of him if this is what you want be in control like the above, when you were in the zone. You created this all now continue on the above one with the shirt, bring that you back. Align with the state of being, of a good healthy relationship, based on mutual love and respect.

Once you understand that you intrigue him, but confuse him you will get it. Stay the path 

So a few hours ago...
I was joking about stalking him, but it turns out he really believes it.  Because of the woodworking classes, but specifically how I was so close in his neighborhood when he texted me back...

Your word is your wand. When you joked about stalking... it went out to the Universe, him whatever you believe and manifested. It was that quick. You are a quick manifester. Now hone it in, manifest only good now.

You need to put your hand on your heart, and say " The old thoughts I learned about relationships, or played out in my life are not necessarily  true. I delete them and am learning to love myself and feel worth of a loving relationship based on my new truths." Put your right finger to your brain and repeat "I have a loving mind and am open to a healthy loving relationship"

Quote
Youíre a great guy.  Itís a waste youíre not with someone right now.
So he didnít believe me and to prove him wrong...I started creating his profile and it got to asking him some personal questions and I guess that made him shut down....But not before he tried to do his usual sexual thing, and once again, me rejecting him.

No, no, no, you are sending out the energy you are again putting him in friend-zone, and 'giving him away'. Don't let your doubts or programming do that. If you don't want him in friend zone don't put him there. End of story. Detach and read this from an observer point of view. Go within, meditate on this. Let those thoughts go. Never again do that. Unless you want that and to move on to being alone awhile, finding a new person or letting him go completely.

Get your confidence up again. Go for fun things out of your comfort zone as you have with job interviews, and life. Do ho'ponopono to the whole situation, again. Send  loving energy see it returned and let the misunderstanding dissolve into it's native nothingness.

By the way he is in his own way trying to show you he cares. Men don't have sex with their friends, or sister type friends. Friends with benefits yes. Stop giving him away, putting him in friend zone, and unconsciously making him feel less of a man. Be open to a loving relationship, stop confusing the whole thing. Stop vacillating. Start loving it all, life, him, yourself and the relationship you are creating. Don't plant the garden , dig up the seeds and spray weed killer everywhere. Plant the seeds and let them grow, water them and hand pick out the weeds ( your negative thoughts)let the good ones stay. Take control of your mind.

YOU can do this. There is NO try. Only do.

Love and light,

Angel 


« Last Edit: September 01, 2018, 02:34:11 PM by AngelusofftheSea »

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Offline Imitation_deg

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Re: I attracted himó He pursued me but he says he isnít attracted to me
« Reply #48 on: September 02, 2018, 09:12:44 AM »
Hi Angel,
Thank you again on your response.  I can depend on you for your help.
Itís bringing my energy down...didnít spend time today listening to your advice.

So I admit....
I was really feeling good about being his friend, like I felt comfortable and open and it was very clear last week that he felt the same way.  In a way...it helped me feel less doubt about myself and the relationship with him and I think that was probably was helping?  And yesterday....I admit, I went backwards.  I started going back to my old self...
I was excited about the progress and then I started getting a little ďfranticĒ about it.  I donít know how else to explain it.

And the whole match-making thing.  I did it to prove to him that he put me in the friend-zone successfully....I wanted to show to him I didnít care if he ended up with somebody else...
But also because I do want him to meet somebody and be happy with...even if it wasnít with me.

The more he keeps a distance, the less interested in him I become.  I canít keep wanting someone who wonít spend anytime with me.  I was really feeling this way...but when I see him, I donít feel like that.  When I get to see him and be around him, I want to be around him more and then I become interested in him all over again....
And so when I donít see him, I donít care anymore.  How can I care about someone that doesnít want to make any time for me?

So admittably....
Iím starting to lose interest.  I am tired of this dynamic and if I canít figure it out with him....then I should should move on.  I donít want to be hung up on this anymore.
Truthfully, Iíd like to be with him but not in this dynamic.  And if this is the dynamic Iím stuck with right now....Iím not thinking itís worth it anymore.

Makes me sad.  I deserve someone who respects me.  Who is open and honest with me...who cares about me and doesnít feel so many negative things about me...someone who wants to be with me.  Someone I donít need to argue with about this, someone I donít have to struggle with for wanting to be with him.

I am looking over your advice.  Iím trying to figure out what you mean about switching words ďlemon drop.Ē
Please elaborate on that.

Thank you again for listening, and thank you for your help.

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Re: I attracted himó He pursued me but he says he isnít attracted to me
« Reply #49 on: September 02, 2018, 04:09:00 PM »
Sounds to me like you're over this guy.

Offline AngelusofftheSea

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Re: I attracted himó He pursued me but he says he isnít attracted to me
« Reply #50 on: September 18, 2018, 09:11:53 AM »
Hi Angel,
Thank you again on your response.  I can depend on you for your help.
Itís bringing my energy down...didnít spend time today listening to your advice.

So I admit....
I was really feeling good about being his friend, like I felt comfortable and open and it was very clear last week that he felt the same way.  In a way...it helped me feel less doubt about myself and the relationship with him and I think that was probably was helping?  And yesterday....I admit, I went backwards.  I started going back to my old self...
I was excited about the progress and then I started getting a little ďfranticĒ about it.  I donít know how else to explain it.

And the whole match-making thing.  I did it to prove to him that he put me in the friend-zone successfully....I wanted to show to him I didnít care if he ended up with somebody else...
But also because I do want him to meet somebody and be happy with...even if it wasnít with me.

The more he keeps a distance, the less interested in him I become.  I canít keep wanting someone who wonít spend anytime with me.  I was really feeling this way...but when I see him, I donít feel like that.  When I get to see him and be around him, I want to be around him more and then I become interested in him all over again....
And so when I donít see him, I donít care anymore.  How can I care about someone that doesnít want to make any time for me?

So admittably....
Iím starting to lose interest.  I am tired of this dynamic and if I canít figure it out with him....then I should should move on.  I donít want to be hung up on this anymore.
Truthfully, Iíd like to be with him but not in this dynamic.  And if this is the dynamic Iím stuck with right now....Iím not thinking itís worth it anymore.

Makes me sad.  I deserve someone who respects me.  Who is open and honest with me...who cares about me and doesnít feel so many negative things about me...someone who wants to be with me.  Someone I donít need to argue with about this, someone I donít have to struggle with for wanting to be with him.

I am looking over your advice.  Iím trying to figure out what you mean about switching words ďlemon drop.Ē
Please elaborate on that.

Thank you again for listening, and thank you for your help.

Hello My dear friend,

Know you got my other, and sorry for delay. You're very welcome, so glad it helped.  Hope all is good now. I saw you responses to another,  you so got this!!! You have the power and are getting there step by step.

Remember you have the power, all your answers are within, and truly you rock. You will have all you need. Just see it, feel it, believe. In mean time make your lists of all you want, have faith and know you are beautiful and deserve love. It is here when you are ready.

Don't forget you have the ability to be such friends with guys, loving, caring and charming, but when you feel lack it makes him think or feel you are putting in friend zone. Just think on it for awhile. 

Yet remember the self love and put yourself on a pedestal. See yourself sexy, loved and appreciated. All is good no matter what way you go as you now are learning more about yourself, giving yourself love and confidence so the dynamics of your life, love life and relationship with him will change. It can and will be for the better, if it is him you want. See self love and reflect that now. See him as not a friend from either you or him and wanting a mutually loving and exclusive relationship with you. Look for no outward signs, just see the end result, feel it and live in it. Wait for it to arrive with no doubts if that is what you want. No matter what has happened circumstances don't matter, remember that. Have faith.

If not him, then let go and see a loving relationship when you are ready.

There once was a man that stood on a hill and went the same path to the river everyday. One day he wanted to go a different path and had to make one. He cut through, kept at it all day, and didn't see the river. He gave up and said it will be easier if I go the same way. A few days later, his friend came and said, "did you see the awesome path straight to the river with no rocky ledges like our old one?"

"Only problem is whomever stopped a few feet from the finishing it."

 The man was stunned, that was him and he hadn't seen how far he had come or how much he did.

I see how far you came, and so have you. Re read your posts, and life. You are strong, and are almost there, don't stop now. Visualize, see the end result of the great life, money, career, new job and relationship. Love etc. With him or someone new. It is all up to you, you hold the power.

Love and light as always,
xo
« Last Edit: September 18, 2018, 09:23:59 AM by AngelusofftheSea »

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Offline Imitation_deg

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Re: I attracted himó He pursued me but he says he isnít attracted to me
« Reply #51 on: October 24, 2018, 09:40:25 AM »
Hey Angel,
Iím so sorry for the hold up but I wanted to give it time to see my results grow.
Thank you soooooooooooooo much for your help and guidance during this time!!!  You really helped me heal a lot of negative energy that I struggled with letting go of and now I just feel so full of light and love energy.  Iím so grateful for all the skills you taught me in how to manifest the love I deserved in my life and everything I wanted, I got.  I am so grateful to see you do it because I wouldnít have believed it could happen, otherwise.  Thank you so much for passing the light to me.  Truly I feel like I have transcended my old state of mind and I have let go of the depression and pain I carried all these years.  The therapy was especially helpful, and you were right, it really did help me release a lot of limiting beliefs and negativity.
He and I are together now and he loves me so much, and I love him so much.  I see the light shine in his eyes when he looks at me, and i am overwhelmed with his love, and Godís love, and literally swell with tears with all the love I feel from this man, and this beautiful gift of the Universe.

You are a God-send, Angel.  Your name is so appropriate.  I love you for all that you give to people and I really could not have done this without you.  I have him in my life in the loving, fulfilling, and happy relationship that I always wanted, and knew I could receive because I deserve it and am worthy of it.
Iíve been able to let go of my old patterns and I canít believe how much I changed in such a short amount of time, all because of the new skills you taught me.  And it really means so much that you took time in your life to meet with me to teach me.  I know this love will last forever because if it.  It is here to stay and because Iíve changed my state of being, I KNOW I will never struggle with receiving, giving, and keeping love in our beautiful and healthy relationship.  Even he feels healed from all his past trauma and has been able to be freed from the pain that he had carried with him.  Heís let go of his old patterns, too, and heís the man I knew he always was deep down inside.
He is so wonderful, and we both love each other to no end.  He has told me over and over how much he loves me and how much I mean to him in his life.  This relationship truly feels like a gift from God.
Thank you so much Angel.  You helped my dreams come true.
« Last Edit: October 24, 2018, 10:23:14 AM by Imitation_deg »

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Offline possum-power

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Re: I attracted himó He pursued me but he says he isnít attracted to me
« Reply #52 on: October 24, 2018, 02:46:31 PM »
Thatís really beautiful... itís so beautiful that itís possible!!
And that it happened to you, you deserved it  :-*

Weíre all traumatised really itís more about whether weíre able to grow, heal, connect... learn.
In your case you and he obviously were  :D

Offline Imitation_deg

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Re: I attracted himó He pursued me but he says he isnít attracted to me
« Reply #53 on: November 04, 2018, 09:26:31 AM »
Hi Angel!
I canít wait to see you in my part of town soon! Iím really excited about the upcoming seminar and I canít wait to learn even more amazing and wonderful techniques from you, and I am so excited to see what other beautiful things I can manifest in my life.
I am excited to hang out and show you around!  Thereís so many cool places to see that I know youíll love, and I know weíre going to have so much fun together.

I have a favor to ask of you.  Can I get a hotel booked for the seminar?  Iíd love to bring someone along and Iíd love for us to stay together in the hotel room.  I told him about you and how much youíve helped me with your techniques throughout all of this, and how much of your time and beautiful light energy you shared with me to help me with making my life better.  I told him about how I was speaking at the seminar and he wants to come and encourage me, and itís so flattering that he believes in me and my own light energy.  He really wants to meet you and learn from you, too.  He is a person of light too and I know you two will get along wonderfully.

I was trying to get a hold of you on the phone too but just in case you were reading this message, I wanted to let you know what was going on.  Please check my other post, too.
Iím so excited and thrilled to learn more from you!

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