coping with confusion

[need clarity]

hi guys, new to this forum. ok for last 2 years, i have been struggling with confusion.  i m not able to take a firm decision. actually i have a confusion between 2 paths i have. one is traditional which everybody in my family wants me to take but i want to have a different lifestyles. now confusion is i m not able to take a strong decision about the second one. these traditions are coming in my mind which i think i should follow as they are part of me or maybe i can't let that go or afraid of change. i don't know but this is destroying my confidence and my approach. i m full of anxiety and fear about lifestyle. i need a change but jus can't what to do. now i know answer lies in my heart but i don't know but i m getting more confused when i listen to it. any suggestions or exercises that can help. be specific just killing my life

[Edge]

Hi, Welcome to this forum.

I'm sure you will find plenty of support and advice here.

I'm guessing that you come from a background where children are expected to follow the path their parents want for them, and that this is a tradition that has been 'drummed' into you from a young age. I fully understand that this makes it extremely difficult to do something different to your family's expectations.

You said “one [path] is traditional which everybody in my family wants me to take but i want to have a different lifestyles”.
I think you've answered your own question. It seems you won't be happy taking the traditional path.
It is said that you should follow your passion. If the other path is your passion, then, in my humble opinion, that is what you should do.
We are not here in this physical existence to be unhappy.

Have you spoken to your family about what you really want to do? You should do so, even if you think the response will not be a good one.

In my opinion, it is unfair for them to put their expectations onto you – it is your life, not theirs. How would they feel if you told them what to do with their life?

Only you can decide what you are going to do about this, but I do think that you must talk to them, but talk rationally and calmly. Show them that you are mature enough to make your own decisions.

If they don't support you then you will have to decide whether to go ahead without their support. You can. And maybe, in time, they will come to accept your decision.

If you do decide to talk to them I strongly suggest you spend some time using “subjective communication” first. There are posts on this forum about that, but if you want some help with it, PM me and I will reply.

Best wishes,

Edge.

[need clarity]

thanks but problem is that i m not able to choose the other path with full conviction. i sumtimes feel that i m not doing fair thing with my family and with these traditions. actually these traditions is quite attached to my family for very long time. its like we are known and identified with these values we follow. and i m feeling guilty even before breaking them. i am having fear, guilt, anxiety about this. the other  path is less of a passion and more of lifestyle change. also i get influenced by others easily. i somehow focus my mind to other path but a dialog by family member talking about these values makes me feel  bad about breaking it. yes actually i tried to talk to family about this. they were very upset and that made my work lot more difficult. i want to convince them as it is difficult for me to hurt them. ok i will search about subjective conviction.

[lashark]

The amazing thing about being a deliberate creator of your reality is that you can have it all : ) You can have it all AND the universe sets it up in a way where its a win-win for everyone around! Its that awesome !

[2thetop]

Hey need,
Welcome to the forums.  To go a long with the above posts, i would suggest you writing affirmations and repeating them to yourself through out the day.  you are definetly at a point of change.  you just have to decide which path you want.  I went through something like that at the age of 15.  i chose a path i wanted and not a path my family wanted.  It caused a great amount of turmoil in my life because i was hurting from the idea i hurt my family.  now however, my family has told me they only wanted my happiness, and if i am happy with my life then they are happy.  Basically, take your family out of the picture, and think of you and what you want.  your family will come around.   

[Milos]

Hello,

I am also new to this forum. I wanted to introduce myself in Say Hello forum, but something is not working there. I am sure it will be fixed soon.

Need clarity, I wanted to say to you that your subconscious mind knows the correct answer. You only need a technique to access it. When I have a dilemma I always consult my subconscious mind and it never gives me wrong answer. For these purposes I use Silva method techniques, but you can do it without any special technique. Maybe you read a book The Power of Your Subconscious Mind by Joseph Murphy? He describes this situation well.

When you go to bed in the evening, ask a question, in fact repeat this question until you fall asleep. Let it be the last thing you are consciously aware. And the question should be really clear and must not be ambiguous. You should not ask whether you should do this or that. No. Maybe your subconscious have another answer for you. Do not predetermine a solution. Ask something like this: "What should I do in my life" or "Which job should I take" or something general like that.

You can expect your answer to come in different ways. Maybe you will dream something that will clearly explain what you should do. Maybe tomorrow you will hear some strangers talking on the street and some sentence will be your answer. Maybe you will read some title in the newspapers. The point is that when you hear something like that you will simply know that this is your answer. Believe me, you will know with your whole being.

And when you get the answer do not try to ignore it if you don't like it. Your subconscious knows what is best for you and if you listen to it, you'll see in the future that you were right.

I hope I helped you. Try this technique, you have nothing to lose and it is very simple. Regards